Snow Crash

For purposes of this evening’s job, the man with the glass eye has already supplied her with a “driver and security person,” as he put it. A totally unknown quantity. Y.T. isn’t sure she likes putting up with some mystery guy. She has this image in her mind that he’s going to be like the wrestling coach at the high school. That would be so grotendous. Anyway, this is where she’s supposed to meet him.

 

Y.T. orders a coffee and a slice of cherry pie à la mode. She carries them over to the public Street terminal back in the corner. It is sort of a wraparound stainless steel booth stuck between a phone booth, which has a homesick truck driver poured into it, and a pinball machine, which features a chick with big boobs that light up when you shoot the ball up the magic Fallopians.

 

She’s not that good at the Metaverse, but she knows her way around, and she’s got an address. And finding an address in the Metaverse shouldn’t be any more difficult than doing it in Reality, at least if you’re not a totally retarded ped.

 

As soon as she steps out into the Street, people start giving her these looks. The same kind of looks that people give her when she walks through the worsted-wool desolation of the Westlake Corporate Park in her dynamic blue-and-orange Kourier gear. She knows that the people in the Street are giving her dirty looks because she’s just coming in from a shitty public terminal. She’s a trashy black-and-white person.

 

The built-up part of the Street, around Port Zero, forms a luminescent thunderhead off to her right. She puts her back to it and climbs onto the monorail. She’d like to go into town, but that’s an expensive part of the Street to visit, and she’d be dumping money into the coin slot about every one-tenth of a millisecond.

 

The guy’s name is Ng. In Reality, he is somewhere in Southern California. Y.T. isn’t sure exactly what he is driving; some kind of a van full of what the man with the glass eye described as “stuff, really incredible stuff that you don’t need to know about.” In the Metaverse, he lives outside of town, around Port 2, where things really start to spread out.

 

 

 

Ng’s Metaverse home is a French colonial villa in the prewar village of My Tho in the Mekong Delta. Visiting him is like going to Vietnam in about 1955, except that you don’t have to get all sweaty. In order to make room for this creation, he has laid claim to a patch of Metaverse space a couple of miles off the Street. There’s no monorail service in this low-rent development, so Y.T.’s avatar has to walk the entire way.

 

He has a large office with French doors and a balcony looking out over endless rice paddies where little Vietnamese people work. Clearly, this guy is a fairly hardcore techie, because Y.T. counts hundreds of people out in his rice paddies, plus dozens more running around the village, all of them fairly well rendered and all of them doing different things. She’s not a bithead, but she knows that this guy is throwing a lot of computer time into the task of creating a realistic view out his office window. And the fact that it’s Vietnam makes it twisted and spooky. Y.T. can’t wait to tell Roadkill about this place. She wonders if it has bombings and strafings and napalm drops. That would be the best.

 

Ng himself, or at least, Ng’s avatar, is a small, very dapper Vietnamese man in his fifties, hair plastered to his head, wearing military-style khakis. At the time Y.T. comes into his office, he is leaning forward in his chair, getting his shoulders rubbed by a geisha.

 

A geisha in Vietnam?

 

Y.T.’s grandpa, who was there for a while, told her that the Nipponese took over Vietnam during the war and treated it with the cruelty that was their trademark before we nuked them and they discovered that they were pacifists. The Vietnamese, like most other Asians, hate the Japanese. And apparently this Ng character gets a kick out of the idea of having a Japanese geisha around to rub his back.

 

But it is a very strange thing to do, for one reason: The geisha is just a picture on Ng’s goggles, and on Y.T.’s. And you can’t get a massage from a picture. So why bother?

 

When Y.T. comes in, Ng stands up and bows. This is how hardcore Street wackos greet each other. They don’t like to shake hands because you can’t actually feel the contact and it reminds you that you’re not even really there.

 

“Yeah, hi,” Y.T. says.

 

Ng sits back down and the geisha goes right back to it. Ng’s desk is a nice French antique with a row of small television monitors along the back edge, facing toward him. He spends most of his time watching the monitors, even when he is talking.

 

“They told me a little bit about you,” Ng says.

 

“Shouldn’t listen to nasty rumors,” Y.T. says.

 

Ng picks up a glass from his desk and takes a drink from it. It looks like a mint julep. Globes of condensation form on its surface, break loose, and trickle down the side. The rendering is so perfect that Y.T. can see a miniaturized reflection of the office windows in each drop of condensation. It’s just totally ostentatious. What a bithead.

 

He is looking at her with a totally emotionless face, but Y.T. imagines that it is a face of hate and disgust. To spend all this money on the coolest house in the Metaverse and then have some skater come in done up in grainy black-and-white. It must be a real kick in the metaphorical nuts.

 

Somewhere in this house a radio is going, playing a mix of Vietnamese loungy type stuff and Yank wheelchair rock.

 

“Are you a Nova Sicilia citizen?” Ng says.

 

“No. I just chill sometimes with Uncle Enzo and the other Mafia dudes.”

 

“Ah. Very unusual.”

 

Ng is not a man in a hurry. He has soaked up the languid pace of the Mekong Delta and is content to sit there and watch his TV sets and fire off a sentence every few minutes.

 

Another thing: He apparently has Tourette’s syndrome or some other brain woes because from time to time, for no apparent reason, he makes strange noises with his mouth. They have the twangy sound that you always hear from Vietnamese when they are in the back rooms of stores and restaurants carrying on family disputes in the mother tongue, but as far as Y.T. can tell, they aren’t real words, just sound effects.

 

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