Chapter 23
Gyver was quiet in the car on the way to school the next morning, so quiet I dozed lightly until we pulled into a parking space. We were both avoiding any conversation about what almost happened in my bedroom on Wednesday and the avoidance seemed to swallow all possible words.
Ryan was waiting for me, leaning against the trunk of his car and smiling. He stepped over and opened my door for me. “Good morning, gorgeous. ’Sup, Russo.”
“Hey.” His eyes flicked down to Ryan’s hand around my waist and back to my face.
“Hi.” I was clutching my necklace and trying to prioritize my last day in school before next week’s chemo: I needed to smooth things over with Gyver, I had to talk to the girls, I needed to collect all my schoolwork for next week—hopefully I’d only be gone a week—and I had to figure out the right lies to cover my absence.
Gyver first. I smiled at him. “Thanks for the ride. Are you around tomorrow? Let’s do breakfast before I check in.”
“Check in?” His eyes narrowed. Ryan responded by pulling me closer. Neither was a good sign, but I didn’t have the energy for their stupid macho competitiveness.
“I told Ryan about my cancer. He knows I’m going back to the hospital.”
There was more than shock on Gyver’s face. Was it confusion, betrayal, or pain?
Ryan was calm. He clapped his free hand on Gyver’s shoulder—perhaps a little harder than necessary. “Thanks for being there this summer—when I couldn’t be. I appreciate it, man.”
“I didn’t do it for you,” Gyver snarled.
“I know, but still, thanks.”
Gyver looked at me; I studied my shoes. “Breakfast sounds good. I’ll see you in math class, Mia.” He shoved his hands in his pockets and headed into the building.
“I think he liked being the only one who knew,” Ryan said.
“He’s just not a morning person.” I watched Gyver’s back disappear through the school doors.
“Apparently. Well, at least we can count on Ally for some OMGs about our date. What did the rest of them say? Do I need to stay away from Hil’s claws?”
“I didn’t tell them.” It hadn’t even occurred to me and now I felt like an idiot. A slightly panicked idiot.
“Really? Aren’t you four psychically connected?”
The joke fell flat because it used to be true. Maybe if I wasn’t busy lying to them, debating whether to lie, and being exhausted by the reason for the lies, maybe then the Calendar Girls would know about the date.
“Did you tell anyone?” I asked.
“Yeah. Chris. Was I not supposed to?” We were at the top of the steps and Ryan opened the door. Chris was waiting for us—with Hillary and Lauren. “Shit,” he said under his breath.
“Mia, do you have beer-flavored panties or something? Because I never thought I’d see this guy whipped!” Chris jumped on Ryan’s back, and I stepped away to avoid being trampled.
“You mean it’s true?” Hil latched onto my arm and shook me. “I told Chris he must be lying because I’d know.”
Lauren watched the boys, but her words were for me. “You would’ve told us, right?”
“I didn’t plan it, it just kinda happened. And then it was late.”
“It was late? That’s your excuse?” Hil’s face was pinched with hurt. “I can’t believe I had to find out from Chris.”
“So it is true?” Ally’s feet hadn’t stopped sliding on the floor, but her arms were already around me—crashing me into Lauren, who laughed and joined in the hug.
She turned to Hil. “See? We weren’t pressuring her into anything she didn’t want to do.”
Hil rolled her eyes and sighed. “So much for Single Senior Year. I guess if you’re happy …”
“We’ll do a toast tonight!” said Ally.
“Definitely! I can’t remember the last time you came out,” Lauren added. I could. Every detail. What I was wearing and the song that was playing when Gyver showed up and dragged me out.
“Wait. I’m still single.” Wasn’t I?
“See! I told you, Chris. You’re full of bullshit.”
Chris raised his palms in an I’m-innocent gesture. “Ryan said—”
“I said I was taking her out after the game.” Ryan carefully extracted me from the crush of girls. “Give it a rest, Hil. Mia’s a big girl and can make her own decisions. You’d know this if you’d quit bitching long enough to hear her.”
When had people stopped listening when I spoke? It used to be I opened my mouth and had an audience, now they needed to be prompted to pay attention. And, ironically, Ryan used the same argument on Hil that she’d used on Ally and Laur yesterday: that what I wanted should matter more than what she wanted for me.
I finally had the floor, but I had nothing to say, so I repeated myself with an added dash of attitude. “I’m still officially single. Calm down.”
“Not for long,” quipped Chris, draping an arm around Hil’s shoulders. “How ’bout you follow your brilliant friend’s example and go out with me?”