“How could you not tell me all this stuff?” Milo looked hurt and offended. “Jack told me you were going to turn last spring, but you changed your mind because of me. And I appreciate that, I really do, but you almost did! And you wouldn’t have told me about it? You were trying to make the biggest decision of your life, and you didn’t mention anything to me.”
“I couldn’t tell you anything,” I sighed. “They told me not to, and I raised the same argument. How would it be better for me to just disappear instead of telling you something. And they said it would be too hard for you to live a normal life while knowing that they exist.”
“But you could’ve made up something,” Milo shook his head. “You could’ve just told me about the whole triangle thing with Peter and Jack, and said you were thinking about running away with one of them. That was close to the truth.”
“I don’t know. I didn’t think of it, I guess,” I sighed. “Look, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you anything. But at least I can talk to you about it now, right?”
“On the subject of which,” Milo grinned and titled his head. “What’s this I hear about you kissing Jack last night?”
“Word travels fast.” I avoided his eyes and what they insinuated.
“Come on. There’s like four people in that house. You’re the only word there,” he laughed, shaking his head. “What else would we really talk about?”
Looking down at my feet made me realize how badly the dark purple nail polish was chipping on my toes. In order to reach it better, I pulled my knee to my chest and started scraping at the nail polish with my fingers.
“That’s really hygienic.” Milo nodded to my foot being on the counter, and I stuck my tongue out at him.
“What do you care? You don’t eat here anymore.” I smiled, almost sadly. “Hell, you don’t even eat anymore. Or get sick. I don’t think this is really an issue for you.”
“You’re avoiding the major issue.” He pulled out a kitchen chair and sat down, then tapped the empty spot next to him. “Come on. Have a seat, and tell me all the juicy details.”
“There isn’t anything juicy to tell!” I groaned and stayed where I was.
“You kissed Jack! There’s got to be something to tell!”
“Are you even cool with talking about this?” I looked up at him, studying his face for any jealous aggression that might be brewing underneath.
“Yeah, I’m so over that.” He leaned back and rolled his eyes, then shook his head. “Okay, I’m not like completely over him per se, but I’m not crazy jealous anymore. Remember at the club? I didn’t freak out then, and he was all over you most of the night.”
“He was not all over me,” I said, but my cheeks burned crimson. “He protected me a lot, and so he had to touch me. But it wasn’t like we were making out or anything.”
“No, that was for later.” Milo winked at me.
“It wasn’t like that!”
“Alice, everyone gets it. You and Jack are seriously into each other. What exactly do you think you’re hiding from me? And more importantly, why do you think you need to hide it from me?” Milo asked me directly, and I squirmed a bit.
“I don’t know.” I kept my arms wrapped around my leg and rested my head against my knee. “I guess I’m just not used to talking about any of this stuff. And I can’t really explain it, but I feel weird talking about it because of Peter.”
“Peter? He’s not even here. What does he have to do with anything?” Milo’s brown eyes were filled with confusion.
“Nothing.” I shook my head. “Everything. Did Mae explain to you what it meant to be bonded?”
“Yeah. I mean, she did the best she could, but considering I’ve never even had a boyfriend, it’s a little hard for me to get a handle on what you guys feel.” Looking the way he did, it would be hard to believe that he’d stay single for much longer.
“It’s not like having a boyfriend.” I chewed my fingernails and stared down at the faded floor tile, thinking of how to explain it. “In a really abstract way, it’s like having a crush, but it’s far more physical than that. From what I can tell, from when Jack’s really having bloodlust, it’s something similar to that.”
“What are you talking about?” Milo squinted at me. “You know what Jack feels when he’s hungry?”
“Kinda. I can feel what he feels, most of the time. Not exactly, unless it’s really intense, but I usually have a sense of what’s going on with him. I think he always purposely eats before we’re together, just to be safe, but I’ve felt what he feels when he really wants my blood.”
A change inside of Jack was completely visceral when he wanted me that way. Raw and intense, there was something frightening about it, but it was completely exhilarating and always made me want him more.
“Wait, wait, wait!” Milo waved his hands to stop. “You feel what he feels? That’s not normal, is it? You never did that before.”