My nerves and insides were tied into knots as I prepared to go through with the one thing I swore I would never do…until him. I smiled to myself as my heart drummed through every panic-stricken moment; every piece of clothing placed on me. Every inch covered in white and bright beads. My body vibrated with itching nerves firing off. The pants and soft knee-high boots, the weird half-skirt that wrapped around my right hip, even the bodice that went over an off-the-shoulder chemise. Each one made me want to rush out of the room. My hair was pulled from my face in three braids—one in the back and one on each side, with beads and white leather laces tied at the ends.
Why are you so nervous? Marren said in our private way.
“I’m not nervous.”
Okelo glanced at me with the other werewolf girl, whose name I didn’t remember. Their looks spoke of worry and questioned the stability of my mind. I realized I had spoken aloud.
I smiled. “Er…right? This is normal jitters? There’s no real reason to be nervous, is there?”
Both girls shared a smile and a giggle while Okelo shook her head.
“You two could not be any more perfect for each other. It’s probably that you’re anxious and can’t wait to belong to him forever,” Okelo said.
Right. Forever.
I’m not nervous. I spoke to Marren this time.
I can’t wait to see you.
A nervous chuckle escaped me. I found myself bouncing a little. The baby kicked her annoyance.
“Careful or you’ll bounce right out of your dress,” the other werewolf girl spoke with the edge of a giggle at the end of her words.
“I can’t help myself. I’m scared.”
“What for?” Okelo asked. Her brows had furrowed together in the way a parent’s would while staring hard at their child who had done something they should have thought better than to do.
I opened my mouth to offer some form of explanation, but only air escaped and an “Um…?”
Both girls dug into the giggling this time. I had to admit, even to myself, the idea of me being nervous was a little ridiculous. I’ve already given myself to Marren so completely and irrevocably that this ceremony should make perfect sense. Even as a small step toward forever with him. A bubble of giddy laughter sprung from my belly and out of my mouth. Loud and light.
My heart danced and I knew Marren did the same.
See you soon, I said.
See you soon, Marren whispered back.
With the final burst of laughter, my body calmed, and with it, a serene peace came over me.
***
I stood at the entrance to the Circle of Gathering. A place where Marren’s, and soon my, people gather to celebrate, mourn, pray, and even prepare for battle. It is a place of immense importance for the race of therianthropes. A sacred and special place.
It was formed at the foot of the mountain under Marren’s window. It was in a perfectly shaped circle and cleared of everything except a few toppled over tree trunks for benches, stumps for stools, and a large fire pit at the center. Lush green grass covered the ground in soft spikes, only fading as it neared the fire pit, which was blazing with heat and life at that very moment.
All types of races showed for the ceremony. Many of the werewolves dressed in strange and colorful garb, dancing in rhythmic ways around the fire, with beating drums and the sounds of other instruments. The songs they were lifting and beautiful. It came as a surprise to realize only a few people actually sang, though it sounded as if everyone had joined in. Absolutely enchanting.
I found the one directing the ceremony and it struck me hard, the feeling and pull within my heart from the missing piece of my life. I tried to not think of Danst and the gaping hole he left. He was supposed to be the one to oversee this. My heart sagged as a tear snuck down my cheek. I quickly wiped it away and took a deep breath.