You Only Love Twice (Masters and Mercenaries #8)

It meant that Tennessee Smith would cease to exist. He would have no name, no passport, no home or bank accounts in the United States. He would be a ghost.

Ten turned to Jesse. “I swear to you, I’m going to figure out what’s going on and we’ll handle the Caliph. If I have to have the fucker assassinated, I will. But I have to find out what’s going on first.”

“I think it’s the senator,” Phoebe said. “I think somehow he’s working with al Fareed.”

“Proof?” Ten asked.

She shook her head. “I have a whole lot of conjecture, but I need to know who recommended Ace. I was right about that. He couldn’t have made it on an Agency black ops team without some serious recommendations. Who was it?”

Hutch turned to his keyboard and his hands flew across it. He sat back and then tried again. “What the fuck? Boss, I don’t have access to those records. What the hell? I’ve got the security clearance. Why am I blocked?”

She exchanged worried glances with Ten. They weren’t just being called back. Ten’s job was on the line and he was about to have his life picked apart by bureaucrats because he’d stepped into something none of them understood yet. Phoebe made her own command decision. “Simon, get your wife on the phone or better yet, get Adam. They could be watching Chelsea. Her job is on the line, too.”

Simon snorted, an oddly elegant sound. “She doesn’t particularly care one way or another. If the Agency fires her, she’ll just go to work for Tag. I’ll call Adam as well. We’ll have an answer soon.”

Jesse stood up. “I’ll start looking for flights for me and Si and Erin.”

There was something about the way he said it that made her wary. Already, they were splitting up. Hutch and Theo were moving toward each other, talking in low tones. Simon walked out of the room. Erin and Jesse exchanged a glance.

“You’re not going to leave, are you?” Phoebe asked.

Jesse’s jaw went stubborn. “I don’t have to answer to the Agency. I answer to Ian Taggart. We’ll see what he says. I suppose you’ll be on that plane.”

What did he expect her to do? “I would think you of all people would understand the chain of command, Jesse. I was ordered by my superior officer to return to base.”

He stared for a moment as though he could imprint his will on her. “You can choose. You don’t have to work for them. This isn’t Ten telling you what to do. This is someone with an obvious agenda. They are working against our mission.”

“Those people you’re talking about run the CIA.”

“Oh, and there’s never been corruption there. Now who’s being na?ve, Phoebe? You want to be on that plane, I don’t think I can stop you. Erin, go talk to Kamdar. Explain what’s going on. We still need his cooperation in order to continue.”

Erin nodded and like the good little soldier she was, trotted off to do his bidding.

“They can’t stay,” Theo said, his eyes widening when he realized what was going on. “They don’t have any backup. They don’t have anyone who can help them out if they get into trouble. If they get arrested, the government won’t do a damn thing about it. She can’t stay here.”

Phoebe kept her eyes on Jesse. “He has a point.”

Jesse shrugged. “I never expected the government to help me out anyway. What I do have is Ian Taggart, and I assure you he won’t leave my ass in a prison for months and months. We’re not the Agency. We don’t take our time or wait for the right political situation. We don’t leave our men behind.”

His words hit her squarely in the gut.

He’d been left behind. In essence, she’d left them both there, Jamie to die and Jesse to be tortured.

“We looked. Do you think we didn’t look for you?” The question came out on a shaky breath as every one of her insecurities bubbled to the surface. All the guilt she’d started to toss out settled over her again.

Jesse took a step toward her. “I’m talking about the present, Phoebe. Not the past. You are so damn caught up in the past, I should have known what you would think.”

She turned and walked away. She couldn’t have this argument with him. Not when she was leaving and he seemed determined to destroy himself. It struck her quite forcibly that she could lose another man she loved to that animal because Jesse couldn’t think straight about this. He couldn’t control himself. Last night had proven it. He needed to step back and let Ten handle it.

Did she just think that word? Did she put that word into her head? Love? She couldn’t love him. She couldn’t save him. Hell, she hadn’t saved Jamie. She didn’t even deserve a chance with Jesse. She just didn’t.

“Hey, Phoebe. Stop.” Jesse followed her into the hallway.

She couldn’t face him. Her carefully constructed walls were rotting at her feet. She was the reason Jesse was here now. If she’d been better at her job, he would likely be back in Dallas, going on with his life.