“Well, then the nurse, you know, Wendy, the funny one? She tells me a story about how her mate got pregnant on purpose by using a syringe to suck spunk out of a condom her boyfriend had left in the bathroom bin and injecting it up into herself.”
I suddenly feel hot and my heart begins to race. I know my mouth is hanging open as I shake my head. “She didn’t... I mean, where did you… What did you do with the condom the last time… It was in Ibiza wasn’t it?”
He nods. “Yeah, the thieving fucker robbed me, took my wallet and my watch. And, it turns out, she took the fucking condom with her, too.” I close my eyes for a few seconds while I try and push the horrible anger down inside me. God, I want to punch that bitch’s face in right now. “And it wasn’t the first time. Wendy, the nurse, has become really pally with her the last few weeks. I did a bit of research, found out she was a bit behind on her mortgage and needed a new car so I helped her out on that score. Just a little bit.”
“You bribed the nurse?” Oh, for fuck’s sake.
“No,” he stands up straight, “I just sort of persuaded her.”
“With a new car and some cash to pay off her debts?”
“No,” he replies indignantly, “I got her a better car than she had but it wasn’t new, and I didn’t give her any cash. I paid what she owed on her mortgage straight into her mortgage account.”
“Cam, it’s the same thing. At the end of the day, you bribed her.” He lets out a long sigh.
“This is exactly the reason I didn’t tell you. Considering who your dad is, you’re so straight sometimes, Kitten.”
I shake my head at him. “What if she’d gone to her boss? You could’ve lost custody of Harry? You have to think about that kind of thing now, Cam. You have to be a little bit more responsible.”
His face falls and his mouth hangs open as he struggles for a reply. “I didn’t even think of that.”
“Yeah, well, not thinking is what you seem to do best lately.” He tilts his head slightly while he considers my reply, and then as he usually does when he’s wrong and I’m right, he ignores my comment.
“Anyway, Tamara told her that she had been trying to get pregnant for years. Every time I threw a condom in the bin, she would go into the bathroom and either take it with her or cut the end off, turn it inside out and push it up inside herself. She succeeded once before, but miscarried just a few weeks later.” I’m stunned. I just keep shaking my head, unable to think of anything to say until a thought pops into my head.
“So your spunks not so super then? If it took her all that time to get pregnant.” He rolls his eyes like a teenage girl.
“Kitten, there’s fuck all wrong with my spunk. She didn’t get pregnant because she’s an anorexic junky. She’d been off the gear for a while when she finally got pregnant with Harry; that’s why it worked.” I was still shaking my head.
“So what happened then, this morning. Did you confront her?”
He shakes his head. “Not yet. I took Harry for a walk to calm myself down and to call you, but then I realised I’d left my phone behind, except I hadn’t, that scheming bitch had taken it and hid it; that’s why I was so late calling you.” He’s quiet for a few seconds. “I need to tell you, I want to go for full custody of Harry.”
“Cam, you can’t take her baby away from her. She loves him. She’d be devastated.” I don’t like the woman and she is a complete psycho, but I would never be so cruel as to take her baby away from her. I know what it’s like to have that and then to have it all taken away.
“When she finds out I know what she did, she’s gonna flip, and I don’t trust her around the baby. They’re talking about letting her out the weekend that we have him here, or maybe even sooner.”
I shrug. “Well, if she’s clean and all her results are coming back clear… I don’t like her, Cam, but you can’t take her baby away from her for no reason, and you can’t keep her locked up.” I can see a nerve twitch in his jaw and I know he’s pissed off with my reply, but unless Harry’s in danger, I can’t justify what he plans to do.
“You just don’t want him living with us.” Wow, did he really just say that?
“D’ya know what? Fuck you. I’ve sat here, listening to all your shit, about your day and you haven’t once asked about mine. You haven’t once asked what happened this morning. Len told you I passed out and yet you haven’t once asked how I am. You don’t give a shit about anything or anyone other than you, her and the baby right now. So I tell ya what, you go to court and get custody of your kid and you go and live wherever the fuck you like and leave me out of it.”
I slide off the stool and start heading for the door, then I remember that I’ve got no car here.