“That was Len, not me.” I turn my head in the opposite direction and come eye to eye with Len kneeling at my side. Ash is standing behind him with her hands on her hips.
“I’m sorry. Let me get up. I’m fine.” The boys help me stand, slowly, then lead me over to the living area and sit me on the sofa. Ash passes me a glass of water.
“Drink that, G, then we need to do this. I’m seriously in need of a waz.” I drink my water, and my head and vision clear.
“Go,” I tell Ash.
“Hang on,” Jim calls out, “I’m just making you some tea and toast.” Ash rolls her eyes.
“Sit down, babe,” Marley tells her. “If you stop pacing, you won’t need to go so badly.” Ash actually sits down without argument, which is most unlike her, and it suddenly strikes me how much pressure her and Jimmie must be feeling.
Jim comes in with tea for everyone and a plateful of buttery toast.
“I didn’t know who was hungry,” Jim says, always the mother hen.
“Me,” Ash says. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’ve not stopped eating this past…” She trails off as we all stare at her. A massive smile breaks out on her face. She shakes her head. “I don’t need to do this test. I know I’m pregnant.” We all take a slice of toast and sip our tea. Nobody speaks a word.
*
Fifteen minutes later, we are all standing around the kitchen bench, staring at the six home pregnancy tests that are sitting on a piece of kitchen roll.
I’ve called Cam four times, but have got no reply and I’m feeling a combination of hurt, anger, concern and a whole lot of stress. I’m really worried now that there’s something seriously wrong with Harry and that’s why I can’t get a hold of Cam. I’m also feeling sick to my stomach as I stand and wait to see how many lines the sticks will reveal. I swallow hard and try to push down the desire to vomit.
“Breathe, George, take a deep breath in through your nose. You look like you’re gonna faint again, babe,” Len tells me, and as if by magic, two lines appear on the first stick. It belongs to Ash.
My eyes are instantly on Marley, who’s wearing the biggest of grins. “Fuck, we did it, G.” Ash smacks his shoulder.
“We. We. What the fuck did you have to do with any of this?” Before he can say anything, I hear Jimmie’s whispered, “Fuck.” I look down at her sticks. All three of them have two lines on; in fact, all six now have two lines on.
“We did it, G. We fucking did it,” Jimmie whispers with tears streaming down her face.
“We did,” I reply. “Oh, my God, we did. You’re both pregnant. I… Two babies, maybe.” “Why are you two whispering?” Ash whispers.
“I don’t know,” I reply and we all start to laugh.
We spend the next half an hour popping champagne corks, calling my parents and Bailey and then Dr Shepherd’s office.
The girls have an appointment to see him on Wednesday and he will carry out another pregnancy test, just to be sure.
The only person I don’t get to talk to is Cam, but I push down the disappointment I feel at that and spend the journey into the office staring at my phone, willing it to ring.
It’s almost lunch time when I finally get a call that shows his name on the screen. “Kitten, I’m so sorry. I had a meeting with the doctor and a nurse. She’s stitched me right up. I had to get the fuck out of there for a bit, so I took the baby for a walk. I put the phone in the pram, but she took it out and hid it. I found out how she did it. I know how she got pregnant.”
I struggle to breathe. I’ve been worried sick, not only about the tests, but for his baby, and he’s been out walking in the sun. With her. With his family.
“Kitten…” I can’t do this. It’s not going to work. I can’t share him. I’m fundamentally a selfish person and I can’t share him. If it was just the baby, it would be fine, but it’s her. I can’t lie to him or myself and pretend that I’m okay with him spending time with her, because I’m not and it would just eat me alive. I would end up as bitter and twisted as she is and I’ve got two babies of my own to worry about now and I don’t want to be that person.
Lennon takes the phone from my hand and I realise that I’m standing in the middle of his office with tears running down my face.
“See you, you piss taking cunt? You best stay the fuck away from me. After everything you put her through over the weekend, you then don’t even bother to pick up your phone today.”
I listen as my quiet brother, the mild-mannered, diplomatic one, loses his shit with Cam.
“No, you listen to me, and you listen fucking good. She’s been worried sick all morning. She fucking passed out on my kitchen floor earlier because she got herself in such a state. Ya know what, King, you don’t deserve her and you don’t deserve them kids. Now get Benny to come and pick her up. I’m sending her home.”