“Hmm, I like this idea too.” Of course you do. He ran his hands up my thighs, biting his lip.
“I’m sure you do, pervert, but unfortunately for you, I’m not easy. Get up. Your mum’s making pancakes and they smell so good.” I leaned over and kissed him. My heart was doing somersaults. “Come on.” I hopped off him and stood at the side of his bed. “You want me to go down and get you some while you get dressed?”
“I love you, Summer,” he said, looking deep into my eyes and completely ignoring my question. My heart felt like it was trying to burst out of my chest. Sometimes I didn’t believe him when he said it. Actually most of the time. He was…well, him, all gorgeous, tall, dark, and unbelievably handsome, and I was just me.
“Love you too, birthday boy.”
He chuckled and got off the bed, pulling me into his arms. Whoa half-naked! He only had on cotton pajama pants and nothing else. I gulped. My hormones seemed to be in overdrive and my body burst into flames. Wow, wow, wow! I was secretly grateful for all the football and training he did because it did wonders for his chest.
“Now who’s the pervert?” he teased, smirking at me. I rolled my eyes and got up again, opening his wardrobe. “I kinda feel like a piece of meat.”
“Well, either get used to it or cover up,” I replied and threw a T-shirt at him.
He caught it just before it smacked him in the face and pulled it over his head. “Let’s get this over with then. And thanks for that,” he said, nodding at the balloon that was now stuck to the ceiling.
“You’re welcome. That’s not your present by the way.”
His eyes lit up. “Is my present you?”
I sighed, discouraged. “Downstairs. Now.” He saluted and marched out of the room. Following him downstairs, I grinned like an idiot to myself. I had wanted to be with him for years and now we were finally together. This was the first birthday we would spend together, where I could get him something decent because now he knew how crazy I was about him.
He stopped suddenly at the bottom of the stairs. “Did you know about this?” He questioned, gesturing his hand to all the birthday decorations.
“Of course I did. I chose most of them,” I said, smiling proudly. He frowned. “Don’t be a pain in the arse, Lewis. It’s your birthday and everyone’s excited!” Me mostly. Spending his birthday with him—properly with him—was like a dream come true so he could suck it up. Nothing was going to take away the excitement I felt, not even a grumpy arse.
“Fine,” he said and sighed dramatically. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he kissed me. “I know I said this like two seconds ago, but I really do love you.” He pressed his forehead against mine and smiled.
“I know I said this like two seconds ago, but I really do love you too.”
25
CLOVER
Monday, February 7th (Present)
I woke up early. The sun was still working its way over the horizon. My mind immediately flitted to the search for my Lily. Yawning and rubbing my eyes, I forced myself to get out of bed. I had to go to work. I had to keep it up. No one could suspect a thing. My whole family was on the line, and I had to continue my normal routine to protect us.
Looking in the mirror, I tried to recognize the man I was when Mother was alive. I wasn’t as strong, but I wanted to be. I tried to be. I didn’t want to let her down. I could make the world that little bit better while making my world a happy one. A nagging voice at the back of my head still chanted “Failure,” and I knew I would never stop until I had succeeded. I will prove her wrong and make her proud.
I showered, washing myself thoroughly—twice—and dressed in black trousers, a blue shirt, and blue tie. I didn’t look in the mirror again. All I saw now was a shadow of a man, barely holding on. You don’t need her; you can do this alone. I did need her, though, but I didn’t want to.
Growling in frustration, I slammed my bathroom door shut and went down to the girls. I needed to see them, to see how much they needed me, how they appreciated our family and me.
“Good morning, Flowers,” I said and walked down the stairs. The room was filled with the heavenly scent of toasted hot cross buns.
“Morning, Clover,” they replied in unison. Lily looked to the floor. Her shyness was both attractive and endearing. I did have hope for her coming out of her shell a little more, though. There really was no need for her to be so shy when she was among family.
I sat down and a plate of warm buns smothered in melting butter was placed before me. “Thank you, Lily.”
She smiled and muttered, “You’re welcome.” There was something sad about her. The smiles she offered never quite reached her eyes. “Are you not feeling well, Lily?”