That Night

I tried, but they came in every weekend after that, sometimes two days in a row. Mostly they just ordered coffees, sometimes a plate of fries to share. And they’d do stupid stuff, like unscrewing the lids on the salt and pepper shakers so they’d spill when I picked them up. Most of the waitresses knew the girls were giving me a hard time and tried to seat them in another section, but sometimes the restaurant was full and there were no other options. If my side was full, I’d breathe a sigh of relief, but I knew they’d just come back another day.

And then, on the first Saturday in May, Nicole came in with them.

I was shocked to see her there, let alone with them. Mike was running the front and he didn’t know what was going on. I hadn’t wanted to involve him, knowing he was friends with Shauna’s father—Frank McKinney came in sometimes with other cops. Mike sat them in my section.

I went over to their table. “What are you doing here?” I asked Nicole.

Shauna said, “Hey, no one talks to my friends like that.”

Still looking at Nicole, I said, “Since when are you friends?”

I’d never seen them hang out before—I’d never seen Shauna hang out with anyone younger before. Nicole looked up and I noticed she had on a lot of makeup—mascara, shadow, eyeliner, blush, and a bold pink lipstick. I hadn’t seen her wearing that much since the party back in January. I also hadn’t noticed her sneaking out for at least a couple of weeks, maybe a month, and I wondered if she broke up with that guy and was out looking for a new one. She’d done a good job with the makeup but it made her look older, and I felt a sudden stab of fear for my baby sister, who maybe didn’t know how sexy she looked.

“I can be friends with whoever I want,” Nicole said. The words were brave but she sounded tentative saying them, still not used to standing up to me. Shauna gave her a smile of approval, and Nicole sat straighter, smiled back.

I was going to say more but then I noticed Mike watching from the bar.

“Are you going to order anything?” I said.

Nicole ordered fries, and the other girls milkshakes. I could hear them giggling as I walked away.

“Doesn’t she know how awful her hair looks?” Shauna said. “I mean, does she even brush it? Ugh.”

I hated myself for doing it, but I went to the bathroom and stared at myself in the mirror and tried to smooth my hair down, fix my makeup, not sure why it mattered but feeling embarrassed just the same. When I came out again, Nicole was watching, but glanced away, smiling at something one of the girls said.

*

That night I confronted Nicole at home.

“Why are you hanging out with those skanks?”

“What do you care?”

“The only reason she’s hanging out with you is to piss me off.”

“Oh, get over yourself, Toni. She’s fun—and she likes me. Just because you hate her doesn’t mean I have to.”

“You’re not going to think it’s so fun when she decides she doesn’t like you anymore. Why aren’t you hanging out with Darlene?”

I’d noticed that Darlene wasn’t calling but hadn’t given it much thought until now.

Nicole shrugged. “We’re not friends anymore.”

That was weird. They’d been friends since they were kids. “What happened?” Darlene was okay, a little quiet and boring and not as pretty as my sister, with a freckled face and an upturned nose, but she was still nice.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Now she looked close to tears. “What does it matter to you anyway? You’ve never cared about any of my friends before.”

“I’m just trying to help. Shauna will drop you soon, but not before she makes sure that no one else wants to talk to you.”

“Shauna told me what happened between you guys when you used to be friends—you shouldn’t have messed around with her boyfriend.” Nicole frowned at me. “She was really hurt that you betrayed her like that.”

“Is that what she told you? She’s lying, Nicole.” I sat on the bed beside her, held her gaze. “You have to listen to me. Brody and I were just talking one day and she flipped out—she turned into a super-bitch overnight and they made my life hell for a year. They’re still making it hell.”

Nicole looked doubtful. “But she’s been really nice to me. All the kids in my class are jealous.” She smiled, looking proud. I remembered being in Shauna’s circle, feeling like I was on top of the world, powerful and cool. I also knew how much it hurt when she dropped me back to earth.

“Fine, figure it out for yourself. Just stay out of the restaurant.”

She turned back to her homework. “Whatever.”





CHAPTER NINE


ROCKLAND PENITENTIARY, VANCOUVER

MARCH 2010

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