“So how did they smell?” I whisper.
She frowns at me and I raise my eyebrows. “The pheromones, how did they smell?”
“Fucking awesome.” We both giggle and then she winks. “Too bad he’s off limits.”
Oh yes, I forgot to mention a small detail, a detail I try and not give too much thought to because it does my head in every time. Joshua and I share more than a history, we share blood. We are first cousins. His father and my mother are brother and sister, so when I tell you I can’t have this man, I truly mean it.
Chapter 3
The family photos outside the church are a painful reminder of just how closely Joshua and I are related. His younger brother Cameron comes up behind me and grabs me in an embrace and spins me around.
“Tassshhh,” he laughs as he pulls me under his arm and kisses my hair. I smile and put my arm around his waist. This is a normal cousin relationship. A distasteful thought flashes through my mind as the word incest rolls my stomach. My God, how can I be so physically attracted to a relative, and I’m not imagining it. It’s overbearing. I have never experienced it before. It’s as if my body has a spiritual connection with his and my mind is being totally left out of the equation, making no sense or reason. I frown as I sum up the events so far and I’m shocked to my core. I knew I found him attractive before. But now, now the attraction is unbearable.
Josh comes over and kisses Bridget. “Didge,” he smiles. This is the pet name the Stanton boys call her.
She grabs him in an embrace. “Josh,” she laughs. “I’ve missed you.”
He smiles, “Of course, who wouldn’t,” he winks.
She rolls her eyes. “You still have tickets on yourself.” They both laugh as she slaps him. My mother comes over and grabs him in an embrace. I can’t hear what they are saying but she has her hands on his cheeks as she speaks. My eyes are transfixed as I watch the comfortable interaction. This is the first time as an adult it is actually sinking in, fuck we are related. My family love him too. I’m such an idiot. After a minute of speaking to my mum he turns to me and dips his head.
“Natasha,” he smiles and gives me a kiss on the cheek. He rests his hands on my waist as he pulls me into him. I lean into him and put my hands around his neck. His lips linger a little too long on my cheek and my heart stops. I close my eyes as I try to control my breathing before I gather my senses and pull away. We have a familiarity with each other that is still present. I know he feels it too, as he rubs his forehead with obvious discomfort. Discomfort at what our body language has just revealed to each other without a word spoken.
Two men are with Joshua who I’ve not met before. He introduces them to Bridget and my mum and dad and then heads over to me.
“This is Ben and Adrian,” he smiles to me, “they are friends of mine who work with me in America.” I smile and shake their hands. “And this is Natasha,” he smiles. He seems nervous and I see them glance at each other. Adrian comes forward. He’s athletic, tall and blond, immaculately groomed and dressed.
He holds his hand out. “Hello,” he smiles. I smile back as we shake hands. I feel comfortable instantly—he’s got a sort of honest quality about him. He looks at the other guy Ben as if to prompt him to shake my hand, but Ben is just staring at me. My eyes flick back to Adrian. Josh has turned around to talk to his brother. Adrian smiles and shakes his head, “He’s not used to seeing such a gorgeous woman.”
Ben snaps out of it, “Oh sorry, I was miles away.” He shakes my hand. “Nice to meet you” he says in a heavy accent.
I raise my eyebrows. “English?” I ask.
“No, South African.”
“Ahh,” I smile. “So you guys work with Josh?” I ask.
“Um,” Adrian laughs. “Ben is his bodyguard and I am his PA.”
“Ohh,” I smile. Slightly shocked. “Why does Josh need a bodyguard?” I ask.
They shoot each other a look. “Oh you know,” Adrian smiles. “Paparazzi and whatnot.”
“Ohh,” I answer as I nod, feeling stupid.
“So, Natasha,” Adrian asks, “what do you do?”
“I’m a clinical psychologist.”
They both look at each other again. “Oh god,” Adrian laughs. “Don’t psychoanalyse me, you’ll find out I’m crazy.”
I clink my glass to his. “You and me both. Don’t worry, I won’t tell if you don’t.” He giggles and hunches up his shoulders. I do like him. Joshua rejoins us. He has both hands in his suit pants and he still looks nervous. I can’t help it, I’m watching Ben and Adrian who are trying to communicate something to each other without speaking, something about Josh. My eyes turn back to Josh who’s watching me silently. Adrian smiles again and hunches his shoulders as if he’s excited about something. What’s going on here?
“Can I get you a drink?” Ben asks Josh.