“I…” Nicole goes on before I have a chance to say anything.
“He’s thirty-five years old and all he can do is drink and make mess after mess. My father always bails him out. Me, they refuse to talk to. Even when I sent word they were going to be grandparents, they wouldn’t talk. They’re older, my brother is older.”
“Nicole…”
“My point Care Bear, is that age is just a number. When I look at you I don’t see a young girl who doesn’t know her mind. I see a woman who has survived. I see a woman who is in love.”
“Care Bear?” I ask, my heart feeling a little lighter.
“Dragon says he heard Dancer call you that. I like it. It fits you.”
I don’t reply and she must give up, because she turns out the light. I hear the squeak of the door.
“Nicole?”
“Yeah?”
“I won’t give up.”
“I never thought you would. Take a nap, I’ll be out here with Bull if you need me.”
“What was all of this?”
“Even strong women need a kick in the pants.”
“So you just kicked me?”
“You’re welcome,” she says and I hear the door close.
I fall asleep with a smile on my lips for some reason.
Chapter 20
Dragon
I’m probably making a mistake. Hell, I don’t know. I’ve wrestled with it for a week and I’m still not sure how to handle things. The only thing clear is that Dancer is not getting better. He may have allowed Carrie to get closer to him, but a damned fool could see he is just going through the motions. If I continue to ignore it and do nothing? If I do that and Dancer keeps spiraling? That will be on me. So, I know I have to try and reach him. The thing is, I have no fucking idea how to do that.
When I talked with Nicole in Dance’s hospital room and he started having a nightmare, I didn’t think anything of it. I thought he was reliving almost drowning. I know he is having trouble adjusting to the outside and I know he has secrets. I had no idea how bad those secrets are.
When he screamed out against unseen men holding him down, my blood ran cold. When he cried out how he would gut them? My heart stopped. When Dance cried? Cried in his motherfucking sleep? I wanted to join in. I didn’t. My woman did. She cried and looked at me with such sadness, I wanted to scream. Instead I held her close, buried my face into her neck and tried to absorb her. His words didn’t stop, each one more horrific than the next. When Nicole could take no more, I kissed her forehead and squeezed her shoulder. Then, I watched her leave.
It was all I could do not to leave with her. She ran from the room, ran away from the horrible truth. I didn’t. I stood there listening to a story unfold that brought me to my fucking knees.
Now this shit is like acid swimming in my system. I need to try and help Dance. I need to be here for him, like I failed to do when he was locked up. I just don’t know how. I am at a loss. So, I find myself here. I figure I am fucking up, but I’m afraid not to try. Me…afraid. Fuck.
When Dancer makes it into the club the room is eerily quiet. There’s no music, no crowds, nothing. It’s empty with the exception of me. I’m sitting at a table with a bottle of Jack and two glasses.
“What the fuck is this?” Dancer demands stopping at the door. His hands are pushed so far in his damn jeans, it’s a wonder the pockets don’t rip.
I don’t respond. I figure he knows what is going on. I pour two drinks and kick a chair out in front of me. I watch his hand shake as he rakes it across his beard. He doesn’t want this. Hell, I don’t want this.
“Say what’s on your mind,” he orders, watching me.
I take my shot and down it quickly. I drop the glass back on the table. The sound echoes in the room.
“Sit.”
“I don’t feel like doing this shit…”
“SIT THE FUCK DOWN!” I yell, because I knew this wouldn’t be easy, but fuck I don’t need it to be any harder either.
“Drag, this isn’t your concern, this isn’t your fight.”
“Don’t make me tell you again, Dance.”
He sits down, refusing to look at me. He downs the drink I poured and then pours another one, downing it just as quick.
My phone is sitting on the table, the ringer is turned off, but it vibrates.
I don’t bother looking at the number, already knowing who it is. The boys know what is going down tonight. They know to stay away from the club. A few are outside monitoring for protection, but they know not to come in.
“Hey, Mama.”
“Just letting you know I’m here, sweetheart. You were right. Carrie’s pretty upset, she is crying in the bath right now.”
“Thanks baby, try to stay off your feet and tell Bull if he don’t keep you two safe I’ll…”