I bite back the denial, knowing I won’t ever be able to say it with a straight face.
“There’s nothing wrong with liking him. Boys are awesome—obviously.” She grabs my arm and leans close, nearly tripping me. “Do you love him?” she asks, drawing out the o.
I shake her off. “Jane!”
She cackles. “I can’t wait to meet him. I’m sure he’ll get a kick out of all your embarrassing baby stories.”
I shoot her a nasty look. “You weren’t even alive when I was a baby.”
“Yeah, but I’ve seen all the pictures. And I’m pretty good at making things up.”
By the time we reach the restaurant, I’m about to strangle her. Jason arrived first, and he waits for us just outside. He takes off his sunglasses, and his entire face brightens when he spots us. He waves as we approach.
“Gracie, he’s cute,” Jane whispers into my ear.
“Shut up,” I hiss.
“You must be Jane.” Jason shakes her hand with a wide smile. “It’s great to meet you. I know Grace was happy you came.”
“Was she?” Jane raises both eyebrows at me. “You never said that.”
“Because you wouldn’t stop yapping for me to get a word in,” I say.
We head inside and get a table in the back. A few diners point at Jason and whisper behind their hands, but no one approaches him. They stare, though. Not that I can blame them. With his black V-neck and cherry red sneakers, I’m staring, too.
“So how are you missing school right now?” Jason asks.
Jane shrugs. “My dad got me out of it. He’s cool like that.”
I snort but don’t comment. Cool isn’t the word I would use for him. Intense maybe, but not cool. Then again, he’s always been a lot easier on my little sis—the baby of the family.
Jane clasps her hands on top of the table and leans forward. “So, Jason, I hear you and my sister are good friends.”
“I guess so.” He smiles at me.
“What are your intentions toward her?”
I kick Jane under the table, but she doesn’t break her intense stare.
“No intentions,” he says, maintaining a pleasant exterior I didn’t know he could have for strangers. “Just friends.”
Okay, ouch. Never thought just friends would sound so depressing.
The server brings our food, and Jane is momentarily distracted by her seolleongtang—ox bone soup—from continuing with the awkward questions. After a few slurps, though, she resumes with, “Have you asked her out on a date yet?”
I nearly choke on my rice, and Jane slaps my back as I cough.
Jason keeps up his smile, however, looking nonplussed. “No, but I would if I thought she’d say yes.”
I gape at him, my chopsticks falling out of my fingers.
“You must have misread the signs, then,” Jane says, “because I’m pretty sure she would say yes to anything you asked.”
“Okay, that’s enough.” I shove back my chair and stand. “Jane, outside. Now.”
She takes one more slurp, then lets me lead her to the sidewalk in front of the restaurant.
“What are you doing?” I cry. “You can’t just embarrass me like that!”
“You obviously need a little help. You’ve been crushing on that boy for months, and nothing has happened. You both need a shove in the right direction.”
“No, we don’t! You don’t understand anything.” I run both hands through my hair, drawing in slow, deep breaths through my nose to calm myself. “Jane. Please. Just stop. Please.”
She shrugs. “Fine.”
And without letting me say anything else, she heads back into the restaurant. The rest of our dinner is spent with her and Jason chatting it up and laughing like they’re old friends, and me sulking, huddled over my food.
It’s weird, seeing them together. Much weirder than Jane and Sophie squealing about cute Korean singers. Maybe because this feels more like she’s meeting my boyfriend.
After dinner, Jason walks with me when I drop Jane off at her hotel.
Jane takes my arm and pulls me close to her. “We need to talk tomorrow. After the ceremony. I’m going with Mom to get our nails done tonight.” Her eyebrows pull together in concern, a look I’m not used to seeing her wear. “And don’t worry about her. I’ll take care of everything.”
“Thanks,” I mutter.
She hesitates a moment, then says, “You didn’t do anything wrong. You know that, right?”
I manage to offer her a half smile, but it feels like my insides are being squeezed.
Jane hugs me goodbye, waves at Jason, then disappears into the hotel. Jason and I walk back to to where the car will pick us up, the sounds of the city in the air between us instead of conversation, as I grapple with Jane’s parting words.
His company’s driver returns us to the school campus, and when we reach my building, Jason stops me. “Don’t be angry with Jane. She was just joking. And she meant well.”
I shrug one shoulder. “I guess.”
He chuckles. “Besides, she managed to get some things out in the open that we’ve been tiptoeing around for months.”
My pulse leaps, all thoughts of Momma blown out of my head. “What things?”
He takes a step closer. “I know I really butchered saying it last time, but I like you a lot. That hasn’t changed. And judging by the way you act around me, I would guess you like me, too.”
He looks at me with such hope in his eyes that I nearly break down and scream, Yes! Yes, I like you! But I don’t. I can’t.
“Jason, I don’t think this is a good idea.”
“Why?”
Because you’re even more screwed up than me, I want to say. Because I’m terrified that you’ll end up like your dad and my brother, and because you may have no intention of hurting me, but one day, you will. Because all that stuff you said about me being a distraction, because you’re embarrassed by me—it’s all because you have issues, and I can’t handle them.
But all I say is, “Because we would never work.”
He stares at me in confusion. “Why not?”