Kane saw the brief flash in her eyes before her lids shuttered downward, abashed. For just a moment, her lips parted in surprise, and he knew she hadn’t guessed his ever increasing desire for her. Worse than that, he seemed to have offended her somehow.
He had known better, and had gone ahead and opened his mouth anyway. He was not one to share his personal thoughts, not with anyone, even though he had broken that little golden rule at least a dozen times with her already. And she wasn’t asking him his opinion on safe topics like politics or religion. No, she wanted to know his thoughts on sex. It was certifiably insane, and absolutely, positively, most definitely against Kane’s Rules to discuss such matters.
But when she looked at him with those big, soft, brown eyes, none of the usual rules applied.
It was true. He hadn’t been with a woman in months, and certainly not since he came back from Namibia. At first it was because of his injury, but lately, it was because of a different reason entirely. He couldn’t bring himself to desire any woman except the one currently sitting across from him, managing to look adorable and sexy at the same time. He tried desperately to keep his thoughts to himself, but perhaps somewhere he had messed up and she had sensed his single-minded hunger for her and her alone.
He wished like hell he knew what was going through her mind as the reflection of the flames danced within them. Flames easily visible in the extra sheen of moisture there. Great. Now he’d gone and made her cry.
“Shit – no, it’s just -. Ah, Christ. What was the question again?”
“Never mind,” she replied in that quiet way of hers. “You’ve already answered it.”
And how was he supposed to respond to that? Things were going downhill fast, and he didn’t like it, not one bit. He much preferred his detached perch up on his own personal, virtual summit, looking down and being able to take in and assess a situation all with a single glance.
All he seemed capable of seeing at that moment was the woman right in front of him. And her face was back to being that mask again – the one she offered to everyone else. The one that was calm and pleasant and soothing, but showed nothing of the inner turmoil she was feeling – none of the unease that she clearly felt, despite her outward tranquility.
Goddamn it, she could show that face to anyone else, but not to him, because he knew better. “Rebecca –“
Before he could say anything else, she rose, offering him a little smile that nearly broke his heart, and he didn’t even understand why.
“It’s late. I’m going to get ready for bed,” she announced. Without giving him a chance to respond, she grabbed her overnight bag and disappeared into the other room.
Kane raked his hand over his face and sighed. Usually everything was crystal clear to him. He understood situations, knew all of his options, and formed rational, informed decisions. But suddenly he felt strangely lost.
His mind ran through scenarios like a supercomputer as he paced the living area, searching for something that he could say to bring her back to him. He’d become so accustomed to the real Rebecca – the one who felt comfortable being herself around him – that anything less was simply unacceptable.
Chapter Eleven
Rebecca closed the door behind her and leaned against it. What had she been thinking? They had such a good thing going between them. Why couldn’t she just be content with that? Why did she want more?
She shook her head, opening her bag and sifting through the contents. She was not going to mess this up. Things were still salvageable; she hadn’t said anything too revealing. If she went back out there and acted like nothing happened, maybe he would just chalk it up to whatever he’d added to the cocoa and being overtired. God, she hoped so.
When she re-emerged a few minutes later, she knew her plan had worked. A genuine smile tugged as his lips as his blue eyes raked her up and down, taking in her flannel bunny pajamas and fuzzy slippers. She smiled at him shyly, then did a little spin for him, ending in what she hoped was a mock-seductive pose.
“I know. Sexy, right?”
“Sweetheart, you have no idea,” he chuckled; gone was the unease that had etched his features only a few minutes earlier. Rebecca breathed a sigh of relief. No woman in her right mind intent on seduction would wear those pajamas.
She laughed and padded over to the sofa, where she proceeded to unfold and lay out a blanket.
“What do you think you’re doing?” he asked.
“Going to bed,” she answered.
“We talked about this, Rebecca. I’ll take the couch. You take the bed in there.”
“No, you talked about it, Kane. I never agreed.”