“I’ll be back in a few days and we’ll go somewhere more private than this club apartment.”
Harlow smiled at the idea of us alone. I sensed she might even have a specific place in mind. All of our plans would need to wait until I returned to Ellsberg.
Chapter Thirty Three ~ Harlow
Wallowing in self-pity took a lot of effort. Yet the entire world sucked without Saint nearby. Dad and Mom tried to give me hope by talking about having him over for dinner when he returned. I nodded, but a part of me didn’t believe he would return.
My days were spent with family. Winnie babied me a lot. Jace was less helpful. While I sat watching TV with him, he turned to me and rolled his eyes.
“You need to stop sighing or I’m going to scream.”
“Like your girlfriend screamed?” I taunted since he was my little brother and I had a duty to torment him.
“Maybe your crappy personality is why Saint ditched you?” he muttered since I was his big sister so he had a duty to make me miserable.
“Not cool.”
“Don’t mock my woman then,” he said, rolling his eyes again.
“She’ll eat you alive.”
“I’m bailing Ellsberg as soon as I’m old enough to drive. Disappear, change my name, go into hiding. You know, live in fear that she’ll find me and scream until I marry her.”
“Sounds like a solid plan.”
“I’m not kidding.”
“I know.”
Jace grinned then sighed with relief when a car arrived. “Winnie will help you stop whining. It’s her talent.”
“I love you very much, Jace,” I said, grossing him out. “If I don’t feel better when I return, I’ll expect cuddles.”
“I might need to go on the run sooner than I thought.”
Grinning, I left him to watch a baseball game. Winnie waited in the car patiently then gave me a big smile when I joined her.
“You look really beautiful,” she declared.
“I haven’t brushed my hair today. Why are you so happy?”
Winnie pulled the car away from the curb then headed towards Raven’s house for the girls’ weekly get together.
“Mom said you were still sad, so I thought I could help you feel better.”
“By rubbing your happiness in my face?” I grumbled, fighting a grin.
“That was part of the plan,” she said, smiling as we waited at a light. “I know you miss Saint, but he said he’ll come back, right?”
“Yeah.”
“So he’ll be back, right?”
“I guess.”
“Does he lie?”
“Everyone lies.”
“Do you think he was lying?”
“I don’t know.”
“Do you think he plans to ditch you?”
“I would if I were him.”
Winnie pulled the car over and parked at the curb.
“What are you doing?” I asked.
“Why should Saint ditch you?”
Shrugging, I leaned against the door. “He was settling because he thought he’s too messed up for someone good. Now he knows he can control his demons, so why shouldn’t he find someone better?”
Winnie frowned. “Better how?”
“Don’t act dumb. We know I have my issues. I’m always saying no even when I want to say yes. I have a lot of hang-ups. I also want to live in Ellsberg, but he doesn’t like small towns. Why give up what he wants when he can find someone who wants the same things as him?”
“Maybe because he cares about you?”
“I guess.”
“I don’t know him, so maybe he’s not so great. Maybe you’re better off with him gone.”
I frowned. “Saint is fucking perfection, Winnie. He’s sexy as hell and really patient. He never loses his temper even when he wants to crush someone. He keeps his cool and never scares me. He’s also smart and funny. Like I said, he’s perfection.”
“And you suck?”
“No, but I’m not perfection.”
“Maybe he thinks you are.”
“I said he’s smart. So no, he doesn’t think that.”
“How do you know what he thinks? Aren't you just assuming because you’re in a crap mood?”
Crossing my arms, I grunted. “You don’t know.”
“What it feels like to be hung up on a guy who seems way too good for me? Yeah, I think I do. I still don’t know why Dylan puts up with my moods. Last week, I got spooked and wouldn’t leave the house even though we had plans to go to the movies. He didn’t get mad or ditch me. Dylan loves me even though I’m all messed up.”
“Saint doesn’t love me.”
“Do you love him?”
When I didn’t answer, Winnie forced my hand into hers. “You’re a fucked up person. There’s no denying that, but you’re also great in a lot of ways. Those ways might be perfect for Saint.”
“He said he would tell me stuff when he came back. Personal stuff like his real name. I believe he meant it when he said he was coming back, but he might see things better once he’s away from me. Like how he has more options than he thinks. He could see that I’m a dead end.”
Winnie sighed. “I don’t like how this guy makes you feel. Dylan made me feel beautiful and special. Saint seems to make you feel bad about yourself.”