“I . . . missed . . . you . . . so much,” I sob out, gasping as the emotions over take me.
“God Princess, you have no idea. No fucking idea,” he says, rolling to the side and pulling me closer to his hard body. “Never letting you go, Izzy. Never,” he whispers into my hair, squeezing me a little tighter.
I let him hold me while I purge myself of the overwhelming emotions our lovemaking has brought forth.
“I need to clean you up, baby. Don’t move.” He rolls up and off the bed, padding across the large room and into the bathroom. I roll over and look up at the ceiling, hugging myself tightly. I can hear the toilet flush and the water running. He walks out of the bathroom, completely unconcerned with his nudity, right up to the edge of the bed. “Open up, baby, and let me clean you up.” I let my legs fall to the side and watch, in shocked amazement, while he cleans our joint come from my pussy. The warm wash cloth causes me to jerk a few times when he touches my tender skin.
After a few seconds, he throws the towel in the direction of the bathroom and falls back to the mattress, pulling me into his arms again.
“Talk to me, Izzy. What was that?” He doesn’t sound mad, just confused.
Sighing deeply, I reply, “It was just so much, Ax. So much emotion flooding through my system at once. Never in my wildest dreams did I think we would be here again, and trust me, I dreamt of this moment plenty.” I take another deep breath before continuing, looking into his questioning eyes. “You have to understand, Ax. I don’t know what it’s been like for you all this time, but I thought you were gone, Ax. Not just gone, but dead.” I hiccup a sob and take a moment to collect myself. My wet eyes meet his shocked ones. “I lived in hell for six long years, but those years were nothing . . . absolutely nothing compared with the pain I felt thinking you were dead this whole time.”
“What?” he asks, so softly that I would have missed it if I weren’t been looking into his handsome face.
“I don’t understand what you don’t get about that, Axel.” I really am confused now. He seems completely baffled. How can he think I would think any differently! He disappeared out of my life, vanished! How else would someone take that?
“Baby,” he chokes out, “please explain that to me. What do you mean you thought I was dead?”
I turn my head to the side and study him. I am beyond confused. His brow is winkled, his lips are pinched tight, and his eyes . . . His eyes look pained.
“Can we get dressed please? Maybe get something to eat before we have this conversation?” I weakly ask him. I need to take a second and figure out what is at play right now.
He shakes his head, as if clearing the fog, and nods. “Sure, Princess.”
We get up and he throws a tee at me from his dresser before pulling some sweats up his narrow hips. Walking over to where I’m standing, he pulls me back into his arms and holds me tight. Almost too tight.
“I know you felt it, baby. No way had something that fucking powerful skipped your attention. Hear me now, and understand me. We will talk, but nothing you say will change the fact that you and I are happening. I won’t let you go, Izzy. Never. You’re mine, you got that, Princess?”
Do I? Can I so easily give my heart back to this man, knowing he has the power to destroy me? Yes. I can. If I walked away from him now, I might as well pull the trigger myself because I would be dead anyway.
“Yeah, I understand. But, Ax?”
“What baby?”
“I always have been yours, you know that, don’t you?”
And with a bright smile that reaches all the way to his beautiful eyes, he pulls me tighter and places a soft kiss to my shoulder, my neck, and my ear before whispering, “Oh yeah, baby. I know.”
CHAPTER 16
I have been standing on the back deck watching Axel flip the steaks on the grill and enjoying the view for the last ten minutes. If I hadn’t understood what motivated him to buy this large waste of space before, it is all clear now. While I look out at the vast sparkling water his house sits on the shore of, I get it.
He has a very large deck—with of course no furniture or seating. But he does have one large gleaming grill. There is a nice-sized grassy patch of yard before it meets the pebbled path to the dock. And then there is the lake. There are no other houses that I can see. Just woods and a lot of water. It is absolutely stunning.
“You almost ready to eat, babe?” he asks, coming up behind me and handing me a glass of wine.
I look over my shoulder and just drink him in. He is still naked from the waist up and his sweats are riding low on his hips. The sexy V that disappears beneath the material makes my mouth water. His abs clench and he growls low in his throat.
“Stop, Izzy. Stop right fucking now or I will take you right here on the fucking porch.”
“Sorry, Ax, but you did ask if I was ready to eat,” I tease.