Cocktales

“Okay, where do we start?” Bek flattens our awkwardly hand-drawn map of Holly Woods out on the coffee shop table.

I put my iced coffee down and uncap my red marker. “This is my parents’ house.” I circle it. “So, he started there, and he definitely made his way into town. This is the only route he knows, and while I don’t like Gio, he’s stupid.”

“Do parrots have a sense of direction? I mean, they don’t migrate for the winter, do they?”

I tap the pen against my lips. “I don’t know. We know he isn’t at the vet and that she hasn’t seen him since we called, but she is keeping an eye out for him. So, we’ll go to the obvious place.”

“The park. The trees.”

I nod. “I don’t know if there’s anywhere else he’d be.”

“I agree. It’s pretty logical. Birds like trees, so…”

“Even if Gio isn’t a normal bird,” I add. “Why do I feel like we’ll find him somewhere super random like the bank?”

“Because Gio is an asshole,” Bek says matter-of-factly. “Hey, if you and Drake are on a wild parrot chase, where are the twins?”

“Napping. With Nonna. Thankfully.”

“Thankfully that they’re with her?” Her eyes bug.

“No. Don’t be stupid. Thankful they’re napping while they’re with her,” I correct her. “All right. Let’s go to the park and hope we find a parrot.”

“Sounds good to me.” She grabs her take-out cup of ice water and stands up. “Noelle? Question.”

“Mm?” I fold up the map and grab my own drink.

“What the hell do we do with Gio once we find him?”

I open my mouth, and then—crap.

“That,” I say slowly, “Is a very good question.”

“So, we’re praying for a miracle.”

“Pretty much.”





Three





It isn’t going well.

How the hell do you find a parrot in the middle of a town? I don’t even know what I’m doing. Neither does Bek. We’re basically wandering around like hapless, headless chickens, waiting for Gio to do something useful for once and fly in front of our faces.

That will never happen, because as Bek said, Gio is an asshole, but hey. I’m a dreamer.

Actually, I’m a complete realist, but dreamer sounds better.

“How did Gio get out?” Bek asks. “Did she check the attic?”

“That’s what I asked her,” I reply. “But yes, she said she did, and I don’t know how he got out. She likely forgot to close the window before she opened his cage, then walked out, and off he went.” I shrug. “She’s insistent that he was stolen.”

Bek chokes, thumping her chest with her fist. “What? Why the hell would anyone steal Gio? You couldn’t give the creature away, never mind anyone stealing him.”

“That’s what we tried to say to her, but you know what she’s like. You’d have better luck getting a conversation out of a stone.” I sigh and look around the park. “I don’t think we’re going to find him here.”

“Do you think we’ll find him at all?”

“Hopefully not,” I mutter.

She snorts.

“I don’t know. On one hand, I want to find him for Nonna, but damn, this is a lot of space for a parrot to disappear in. I mean, I can find cheating spouses and murderers by putting myself in their headspace, but how the hell do I do that with a glorified chicken that speaks pirate?”

“Not to mention you left your children with the town’s crazy lady.”

I groan. I don’t need that reminder. The last time she was alone with them, she spoke almost exclusively in Italian in the hopes they’d be more fluent than me and my brothers.

They were nine months old. They pooped, crawled, cried, and threw spaghetti at me.

They weren’t ready for Italian lessons.

My phone vibrates in my pocket, so I reach in and pull it out. It’s a text from Drake asking if I’m having any luck.

Me: None. This is ridiculous.

Drake: And there’s two of you.





“Uh-oh,” I say. “He knows you’re with me.”

Bek shrugs. “He’s still not going to find the parrot. Nobody can find the parrot. This isn’t a zoo.”

Ah. It’s so nice to see her pregnancy hormones setting in.

I open the text thread and hit reply.

Me: She needed fresh air and I was going to fresh air. Would you deny a pregnant lady?

Drake: You’re not using that again. That’s why I once spent sixty dollars on ice-cream when you were pregnant. The guilt trip sucks.

Me: You did that because you love me.

Drake: Mmmmph.





I laugh to myself and look up.

And see a flash of green.

“Did you see that?” Bek shouts, grabbing hold of my arm.

“The green?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Will you vomit if you run?”

“No, but Nonna owes me fifty billion pans of lasagna.”

“Done.” I clutch my phone tight and run in that direction. Bek is hot on my heels as we run across the park after a flash of green.

That may or may not even be Gio.

Two years ago, I was chasing murderers in my Louboutins. Now, I’m chasing a parrot in sneakers that were vomited on last week.

Mom life for the win.

We manage to reach the snack kiosk before we both have to stop. I push my way to the front of the line to the teen girl behind it. “Did you see a parrot fly past here? Just now?”

Her eyes widen and she looks at me like I’m crazy.

It’s okay, kid. I know I’m crazy. You have to be to survive the Bond family.

She shakes her head slowly, and I groan, thanking her before I turn around.

“Damn it,” Bek mutters. “What if he flies close to Drake? Then we lose.”

“And I have to live with it,” I moan.

“Ma’am?”

I turn, ready to cut the person calling me ma’am. I’m not a ma’am, damn it! Unfortunately, he’s the cutest, spottiest teenager who looks positively terrified at speaking to me. “Yes?”

“Is the parrot y’all are looking for green?”

I nod once.

“I saw him. He went that way.” He pointed toward the main road leading out of the park.

Bek gasps. “Let’s go!”

“Thank you!” I shout as she drags me away and in the direction of the parrot.

Run. Run. Run. We run like hell after the green blur that we can’t even see anymore.

“Bek. This is ridiculous.” I stop and grab hold of a post, bending over to catch my breath. “We don’t know where he went.”

“Uhhh.” She clutches my hand. “Noelle, I’m gonna be sick.”

Oh no.

Oh no, no, no.

She bends over, and I instinctively reach out to her. I scoop back her hair and hold it as she vomits into a bush behind me.

“It’s okay,” I say softly. “You’re fine. I’ve got you.”

She grips hold of the fence behind the bush and takes a deep breath. “Damn it. Does this stop soon?”

“Yes. When you visit your doctor,” I remind her, releasing her hair as she stands up. I shrug off my sweater and use the sleeve to wipe her mouth.

“Noelle,” she says flatly. “Seriously?”

“Instinct. Sorry. I see vomit and I have to clean it up.”

“That’s gross.”

“No. Gross is wiping shit from your walls at five-thirty in the morning. Vomit is lovely compared to that.” I give her a wry smile. “Do you need to go home?”

“She doesn’t have a choice.” Brody’s voice interrupts whatever she was going to say.

“Aw, shit,” she whispers.

I have to fight back laughter, but that quickly disappears when I see Drake right behind him.

“Noelle!” Brody points at me. “Why the hell do you have her running around after Nonna’s fucking parrot?”

“Excuse me? She wanted fresh air. Don’t put this on me!” I point right back at him.

“She can’t even pee in the morning without vomiting.”

“Say it a little louder, Brody. I want everyone to know that information,” Bek snaps.

He—wisely—ignores her. “You can’t have her go running everywhere!”

I hit my little brother with a death glare that makes even Drake take a step back. “Brody, believe it or not, I don’t control her. I didn’t want her here. Sit your ass down and shut up, idiot.”

He opens his mouth, but he’s shut up by Bek.

“Brody, she’s right. I wanted to come alone. Neither of knew we’d end up chasing a parrot through the park only for him to disappear,” she says wearily. “But I think going home is the smartest choice.”

“What about your car?” he asks.