‘I understand work is important, Mrs Cotter, but—’
‘I will ask,’ I said again. ‘But Evie is completely used to being with my mum, it’s not as if a stranger is picking her up. She loves her Nanny and—’
‘And I’m afraid therein lies the problem, Mrs Cotter.’
‘Call me Toni, please,’ I said. ‘And sorry, what do you mean?’
‘This is difficult.’ Harriet sighed, pressing her hands into the desk and leaning forward.
‘I’d rather you be honest,’ I said, feeling a wave of tension steadily filling the space between my shoulder blades.
‘I get the impression that your mother – sorry, remind me of her name?’
‘Anita.’
‘Of course. I get the impression that Anita rather thinks she knows best when it comes to Evie. Do you understand what I’m saying?’
I nodded slowly. I couldn’t argue with her assumption.
‘It strikes me that, although Anita obviously loves Evie with all her heart, she thinks she knows better than you, her mother, or indeed myself, an educational professional with decades of experience.’
But not a teacher. The thought flitted through my mind, but I had to admit, qualified teacher or not, she was talking sense.
She looked at me. ‘Mrs Cotter – Toni – the last thing I wish to do is offend you but—’
‘Not at all,’ I interrupted. ‘I’m not offended, honestly. You seemed to have worked Mum out. I’m impressed.’
‘Really? Oh, well, that’s somewhat of a relief.’
‘I’m afraid me and Mum often clash over what we think is best for Evie.’ I held back saying any more because it felt a bit disloyal to Mum. She’d be so upset if she heard us talking like this.
‘I’ll be frank, I’m afraid I got the distinct impression that Anita wasn’t a fan of Evie staying for our one-to-one sessions.’
I bit my lip and stayed quiet, but inside I cringed. I hoped Mum hadn’t said anything inappropriate to Harriet.
‘And of course, we all know that children are like little sponges, soaking up the opinions and unspoken disapproval of the adults around them.’ Harriet pressed her lips together. ‘Toni, I’m so sorry to have to tell you this, but I think your mother is unknowingly sabotaging the work we are trying to do with Evie.’
‘Oh.’ A thickness collected in the middle of my throat, cracking my voice a little. ‘I’m sure Mum would never—’
‘Don’t get me wrong,’ Harriet said hurriedly. ‘There’s no doubt in my mind that your mother wants the very best for Evie – but that’s the crux of the matter, isn’t it? She doesn’t really know what’s best.’
I thought about how Mum said Evie was better at home than in Harriet’s sessions, how she said the school staff were to blame for Evie not settling in as well as we’d expected.
‘Toni,’ Harriet said gently, ‘what I’m saying is this: I think, to give Evie the best chance, you need to limit the time she spends alone with your mum.’
48
Three Years Earlier
Toni
Harriet Watson made it sound a lot easier than it was. Limiting the time Evie spent alone with Mum wasn’t something I could just do overnight.
‘I’m relying on Mum with my new job,’ I explained. ‘I could have a talk with her, try to make her see that we all have to work together.’
Harriet gave a sardonic little smile.
‘She listens to you, does she, your mum? Takes on board what you say?’
I sighed. She had a point there.
‘I know things have been very difficult for you over the last few years, Toni,’ Harriet said quietly. ‘You’ve had to manage alone under an enormous amount of stress and strain.’
To my horror, a prickling sensation started up in my eyes and nose.
‘I know your mother has been a great help to you in the past, but now Evie is at school, the welfare of your daughter must become your priority.’
I nodded, although Evie had always been my priority.
‘Our next session is on Wednesday, so I urge you to speak to your manager today, if you can. We must work together to give Evie the best start at St Saviour’s.’ Harriet placed a hand on mine. ‘Other children can be so unkind and are quick to shun. We don’t want her becoming an outsider, now, do we?
* * *
I’d got myself looking fairly presentable for my appointment with Harriet Watson, styling my hair and putting on a little make-up, so when I got home, I changed into smart trousers and a blouse and left early for work.
I had one or two bits I needed to do in town and it wouldn’t do any harm to get into the office a bit earlier. It might even get me into Bryony’s good books, paving the way for me to broach the subject of tweaking my hours on certain days.
I parked the car and walked onto the High Street. On the spur of the moment, as I was passing, I decided to drop by the office and say hi to Jo.
I peered through the shop window and watched her for a couple of seconds, smiling and talking to her computer monitor. I realised she was probably Skyping her sister, which meant Dale and Bryony were out of the office.
I opened the shop door and Jo looked up, smiling, expecting to see a customer. The smile melted away when she saw me.
‘Sorry,’ I mouthed. ‘You busy?’
She shook her head and held up her index finger. ‘Sorry, sis, got to go now. Toni’s here, the new lady I told you about.’
I grinned and walked over to her desk, intending to give her sister a little wave.
‘OK, speak later, bye,’ Jo said to the monitor, turning it off.
‘Oh.’ I stopped walking. ‘I was just going to say hi to your sister.’
‘Sorry, I’m just nervy,’ Jo said, looking at the door. ‘It would be just my luck for Bryony to come back and catch us Skyping. I shouldn’t do it at work, really, but it’s been a quiet morning and the internet speed is so much better than I get at home. Anyway, how come you’re here so bright and early? Couldn’t you keep away?’
I grinned. ‘I just needed to do a few bits, pop to the bank, the chemist. Do you need anything while I’m out?’
‘I’m good, thanks,’ Jo replied. ‘But seeing as you’re in town early, I’ll take my half hour for lunch for a change. Dale should be back soon. Fancy popping to the café next door for a coffee and sandwich, about twelve fifteen?’
‘Perfect.’ I smiled. Forty-five minutes was ample time to get my errands done. ‘Meet you there.’
* * *
I got to the café a few minutes early but Jo was already in there, tucked away at a table at the back. I plonked down my shopping bag and handbag on a spare chair before dashing to the loo.
‘Back in five.’ I grinned, crossing my legs for comic effect.
When I got back to the table, Jo was studying the menu.
‘It’s really nice in here,’ I said, looking at the homemade cakes lining the counter and inhaling the smell of freshly brewed coffee. ‘We should do this more often.’
Jo rolled her eyes. ‘I’d love to, but they’d have a fit if I wasn’t in the office to answer the phones and man the desk most lunchtimes.’
‘You’re entitled to a lunch break, you know,’ I said, picking up the other menu and leafing through. ‘You could insist on taking it.’
‘Yeah, I could,’ Jo said. ‘If I wanted a miserable life. Bryony has this way of quietly torturing you if she’s displeased. I really hope you don’t get to see that side of her.’
‘I think I’m getting pretty close to it,’ I murmured. ‘By the way, our little chat the other day really helped, thanks.’
‘Aww, I just want you to know I’m here if you need to offload, that’s all. I don’t want to push you. I know sometimes it can be difficult to open up, especially as we’ve only just met.’
Jo couldn’t possibly know that I found it hard to trust people I didn’t know, but somehow, she seemed to sense it anyway.
‘I find it easy to talk to you,’ I said, rummaging in my handbag for my purse. ‘You’re a good listener.’
‘Years of practice.’ She smiled. ‘With my sister, mainly.’
‘Let’s order, these are on me,’ I said, frowning as I delved deeper into my bag.