‘Just one, honestly – stop worrying. I’ve left another for tonight, but I flushed the other two down the loo when I woke up. It was amazing to just pass out like that, but genuinely very unnerving, plus I’ve got this horrible metallic taste in my mouth that feels like I’m chewing on filings every time I so much as take a sip of water. I don’t want to take them again after this evening, and I definitely don’t want the girls finding them by mistake and popping one, given they’re just loose. Last night and tonight will be enough to reset me, I’m sure. I feel much better already, actually.’
She did look considerably more relaxed, but otherwise still pretty ropey. I took a deep breath again and smiled at her, determined to hold on to the positives. She’d slept all the night through.
‘That’s great. I’ll go and have a quick shower, then do you want something to eat?’
She threw back the cover. ‘It’s OK, I’ll make something for you. And then I thought maybe I could come with you to get the girls if that’s all right?’
I stared at her. She appeared to have more energy than she’d had for days. ‘Of course. Mum and Dad would love to see you.’
She smiled. ‘Let’s go after breakfast then. We better check the roads, I guess, if there’s been a big accident. We might have to go the back way. They really need to do something about how fast people come up that hill when traffic is trying to turn onto it from Bunny Lane.’
‘They do,’ I agreed. ‘You really do seem much brighter today, Al. That’s great.’
She hesitated. ‘I feel calmer really, not so overwhelmed and desperate. Nothing’s changed, obviously – but it’s so much harder to cope with things rationally when you’re severely sleep deprived too. And I’ve been thinking… the most important thing to me is making sure that Maisie and Tilly aren’t affected by any of this. They need to see me coping normally and, from now on, that’s what they’re going to get.’
I scratched my head. ‘But you were doing that anyway.’
‘I mean taking them to school, going out at weekends as a family. Not allowing myself to be distracted by his social media stuff. I refuse to let him ruin every single part of my life until this is resolved and everyone realises he has, in fact, been lying from the word go.’
She sounded determined – and I felt encouraged. Optimistic, even.
‘Sounds great to me.’
‘Good.’ She hesitated. ‘Listen, on the subject of him, something happened last night while you were at your mum’s. Gary Day came over.’
I froze. ‘What? Here?’
‘Yes. Just after seven. David was just leaving and—’
‘Sorry, wait—’ I couldn’t keep up. ‘What was David doing here again?’
‘He’d called in to pick up his mobile phone; he left it in the downstairs loo by mistake when he came at lunchtime,’ she explained patiently. ‘Thank God he did, otherwise I’d have been here on my own when Day rocked up.’
‘So what happened?’
‘I’d lost the bloody pills upstairs, David came up to help me look – worried that I was making it up and going to ask him for more, I expect – we found them, came back downstairs and the door went. I opened it and Gary was just standing there.’
‘You were upstairs with David?’ I tried to keep my voice calm and even.
She gave me a look. ‘Don’t. That’s exactly what Gary Day said. I opened the door, David was stood next to me – and he said: “well this is cosy. Hubby not in then, I take it?”’
I clenched my jaw but said nothing.
‘He’s so disgusting,’ Alex said vehemently. ‘I replied no, you weren’t in and would he mind explaining what he thought he was doing, coming to our house? He told me it was very simple. If either you or me go near his son again, he won’t be reporting us to anyone else, he’ll be sorting us out himself. He was calm – not ranty and out of control like he was in the surgery that morning – which was actually more unnerving, somehow.’ She shuddered. ‘Anyway, then David said: “just so we’re clear, you’re happy that I’ve just witnessed you say that?” To which Day replied – and I quote – “I couldn’t give a flying fuck”. He wished us a “happy night in” and left. David stayed for another half an hour after that. He offered to stay longer but I said you’d be back for nine. I took the sleeping pill, he left and I went to bed.’
‘You took a sleeping pill, in the house, on your own, when Gary Day had turned up out of the blue and had a go at you?’ I was incredulous.
She frowned, confused. ‘It wasn’t pleasant, but… I wasn’t afraid. You had been to his son’s school, it wasn’t completely unjustified.’ She shrugged helplessly.
‘I said sorry for that.’
‘Yes, I know. What I mean is, I can see it from his point of view, that’s all. I’d have reported you to the police, to be honest, so…’ She shrugged, looking tired again. ‘Anyway, I just thought you ought to know.’
‘Well of course I should know—’ I began, but she was already looking at the clock.
‘We should get a move on. You put the kettle on, I’ll be right down.’
Dismissed, I turned to leave the room.
‘Rob?’
I looked back over my shoulder.
‘I wasn’t having a go, then. I really was just telling you what happened. I actually want to say thank you for your support – practical and emotional. I wouldn’t be doing this without you.’ She realised what she’d said and coloured instantly, ‘I mean—’
‘I know what you mean, it’s OK,’ I said quickly. ‘And you’re welcome.’
Gary Day had been to our house and spoken to my wife. I was furious with myself for putting her at risk and actually I was glad that David had been here too. The thought of her being alone in the house and answering the door to that opportunistic, nasty piece of work made me feel as frightened as he’d intended.
* * *
‘Don’t slip on those leaves,’ I nodded, walking back from opening the gate, as she picked her way over to the Qashqai an hour later. ‘I need to sweep them all up later when it’s dried out a bit.’
She breathed the air deeply. ‘I love the way it smells in the forest when it’s been raining like this; pine cones and bracken, all cleansed. It reminds me of walks with Mum and Dad when I was little. They’d make up stories about fairies living in the tree trunks, then we’d go home to tea in front of the fire and watch The Muppets. Maybe that’s why this place appealed to me so much.’ She nodded at the cottage. ‘I’ve never thought about that before.’
We got into the car and I started the engine. ‘I think people are subconsciously drawn to architectural styles of houses that they were happiest in as a child,’ I said, pulling away. ‘Which is what sold it for me here – rather than just the setting.’
‘Hmmm,’ she pondered. ‘Maybe. I have always had a weird thing about townhouses – people being either side of you. You might be right. Anyway, do you want me to close the gate?’
‘Leave it,’ I said. ‘Saves a job on the way back. I checked and there’s no report of traffic problems, so we’ll just go the usual way, I think.’
We carried on up the road, falling into a companionable silence, then turned the bend. Immediately on my right I saw the police cars from earlier, parked up in the Forestry Commission clearing. The place was swarming with uniformed officers and people in high visibility jackets, while a silver Golf was being placed onto some sort of recovery truck.
‘Shit!’ I exclaimed, and as we passed I saw an officer look up from talking to a man with a dog on a lead before noting something down. I slowed instinctively and glanced back briefly to see, within the trees, the flash of a large white tent.
‘Oh my god!’ Alex said next to me.
‘I know,’ I said carrying on. ‘It looks like they’ve found a body. That’s why they put up tents like that, isn’t it?’
We turned the corner again and the circus disappeared from sight.
‘Do you think we ought to go back?’ I said. ‘They’ll only come knocking on the door later, won’t they? Ask if we saw anything?’
‘No!’ Alex said so quickly that I glanced at her. She had gone utterly rigid in her seat and was staring dead ahead.
‘Are you all right?’ I glanced at her again. ‘Do you need me to stop the car?’
‘Please, just keep going!’ she begged. Then she began to whisper: ‘No, no, no…’ under her breath.
Worried, I opened my mouth to ask her what on earth was—
‘That was his car!’ she blurted. ‘That silver Golf.’