“Maybe.” He smiled crookedly. “I just got here. And the last time we had an in-depth conversation, you were telling me that you were the one in control of the situation. Yet I notice you didn’t call and let me know that you were going to London.”
“I knew Joe had called you.”
“But Joe isn’t you.” He was silent an instant. “I was surprised you and Darcy hadn’t gone back to school.”
“Darcy did. I’ll go back to New York next week. I thought I should help Eve get Michael settled with Jane. We all need family right now. Joe will be coming in a few days.”
“From what I saw, Michael is doing pretty well.” His gaze was still searching her face. “How are you doing?”
“All bruises healing. Who knows how the inner scars are doing? But they will go away, Jock. So stop looking at me as if I was still that kid you’ve known all these years.”
“I liked that kid,” he said thickly.
“Well, she doesn’t exist any longer. I told you that I was grown-up that night at the summerhouse.” She shook her head. “It wasn’t true. But what I went through with Norwalk gave me my diploma.”
“I know it did. I could see it. I hated it.”
“So did I.” She added fiercely, “But I’m not going to let him ruin one minute of what I want to take forward with me. I thought quite a bit about that when I was in that boat heading toward my personal Armageddon. I want beautiful, splendid music, and a family that will light every darkness, and all the love I can gather and hold.” She punched her finger at his chest. “And I want you, Jock Gavin. I don’t know how I’m going to manage to get you, but it’s going to happen.”
“No, it isn’t,” he said roughly. “I told you that’s not possible. I’m the worst choice you could make. You might have forgotten that you’re also my best friend. That’s allowed, that can’t hurt you.” He added bitterly, “And I won’t destroy my best friend because I want to take her to bed.” He added in frustration, “And, for God’s sake, you’re only eighteen years old. Out of bounds, Cara.”
“Interesting thing about age is that it keeps changing. Going up and up and up.” She shook her head. “I don’t know where we’re going, Jock. But I know we have something wonderful that we can build on. So I’m not letting go.” She met his eyes. “And I don’t think you can let me go. I’ll have to see. Let’s do a trial run.” She moved into his arms. “I don’t know much about this part, but I’m a fast learner.” She kissed him. “I’ll ask Darcy about all the nuances.” She kissed him again. “Unless you’d like to demonstrate.” She looked down at his lower body. “And I think you would, Jock.”
He drew a harsh breath. “Damn you, Cara.”
“I’m not going to let you cheat me.” She took a step back. “But I’ll let you give me a little more time if that’s what’s bothering you. You might need a period of adjustment.”
“I’m not right for you,” he said through set teeth.
“You’re the only one who will ever be right. So get used to it. Find a way to deal with me.” She took another step closer, her voice shaking. “We can do this.”
“Get on that plane. You’re going to miss your flight.”
“And then what would you do with me?”
“Get you on the next flight.”
“But you do live a good deal of the year at MacDuff’s Run, near Edinburgh. Maybe I could join you for a few days in Scotland.”
“No!”
“Then take what I offered. You set the pace.” She smiled. “Because today, tomorrow, or in a few years, I’m going to have you, Jock.”
“The hell you are.”
“You’ll see.” She turned and walked back toward the gate. She looked back over her shoulder at him. So golden and wonderful, so angry and grimly determined to give her what was best for her. Why hadn’t he ever been able to understand that he was that best?
She knew the answer. Because she hadn’t been able to make it clear, and that had to change. She smiled lovingly at him because he had to see the love. Passion was all very well, but they had so much more.
She turned and started down the jetway.
“Think about me,” she called back to him. “Think about us. Because you can bet I’m going to be thinking about you, Jock Gavin.”