“We know you are,” he said to me. His drawl was so gentle that I almost forgot he thought it was al in my head.
“We’re going to have to keep you tied up, though. You understand, darling’?”
“Don’t cal me darlin’,” I managed to say.
He smiled. “Good to see you’re stil with us. But just so your, er, other self knows...your father has the police alerted to what’s going on. In case you get any more out of hand.
And, I’m afraid, that despite what your sister thinks, the hospital is going to be the best place for you. I’m just sorry I didn’t know about this sooner, Perry. I’m sorry I actual y thought you were haunted. I would have never gone along with the clearing thing; it just made things worse. It gave proof to the delusion.”
But you saw! I thought, now too weak to say anything.
You saw the beast! You’re a liar. A goddamn liar!
He stroked the hair off my forehead. I flinched and glared at him, which only made him point at my dad. “I think we might need some more rope here.”
“You guys are fucking sick,” Ada snarled from the back of the room. She shook her head and held herself tightly. “I can’t stand here and watch you do this. I won’t.”
She shot me one last look. It was a look I couldn’t read.
She left the room and my heart sank.
My dad re-did the ropes on my arms and legs so I was strapped down to the bed. There was a moment where I was free. Where I thought about shoving him off and running away. I didn’t know where, but I would leave the house and run to the river and just run and run until they couldn’t find me. I’d be safe there. I wouldn’t be dragged off to the hospital. I’d stil have this thing inside of me, Abby, a demon, whatever it was, but at least I wouldn’t be carted off to a hospital. I didn’t want to destroy myself in a sterile room. Like a dying dog, I wanted to go somewhere far away and quiet. It was the last thing left that I could control.
But I didn’t move. I didn’t make a run for it, even though I could have. My dad finished tying me up, avoiding my eyes the whole time. He left the room with my mother. Then it was just Maximus and me.
He pul ed up the chair from the desk and looked me over. His green eyes glittered apologetical y but it wasn’t enough. I had wanted more from him. I had wanted someone who would have fought to the death over me. I wanted someone who’d sacrifice for me. Someone who had my back. Someone who would save me if I couldn’t save myself.
That was not Maximus. It never had been. I was just a quick fuck to him. Never anything else.
Story of my life.
“I’m sorry it has to be this way, Perry,” he said, knowing better than to cal me darling again. “I real y like you. A lot. I mean an awful, ridiculous amount.”
You’ve got to be kidding me. Was he breaking up with me? We weren’t even in a relationship.
“But you need so much more than I can give you,” he went on, running his fingers down my arm. “You need help and I’m going to help you as much as I can, but you have to help yourself too. It’s a darn shame this had to happen. I think we could have real y had something. And, wel , maybe someday we can. I think we’d make quite the team. You know, outside of al this. Especial y if you agree to doing the show with me. When you’re better, of course.”
That did it.
“Maximus,” I said.
He gave me an inquisitive look. “What?”
I spat in his face with al the nastiness I could muster. The bal of spit landed right on his nose.
I smiled viciously at the look of shock on his face. “That was from me, too. The real Perry.”
He gave me a mean little smile, then wiped his nose and got up. He put the chair back, saying “I’l be staying overnight here. I’l come see you later.”
He pul ed the door behind him until it was a few inches open. I was alone with my thoughts until the pil s kicked in and pul ed me into a haze.
Of course, I was never real y alone anymore.
I might never be alone again.