Dex, I love you. That’s what I wanted to say. I wanted to tell him that and confess my sins of what I did to him.
But of course, I didn’t do either of those things. I just gave his hand a squeeze and said, “I’m in this with you, you know that.”
He nodded and fished a piece of Nicorette out of his pocket. “I really wish we could just go back home and be alone.”
Be alone? I was unable to hide the shocked look on my face.
He caught the expression and shot me a sly grin as he popped the gum in his mouth.
“Don’t worry, kiddo. I just meant I’d rather be with you and not with any of these fucks that Jenn wants us to eat with.”
“I thought they were your mutual friends,” I said, crossing my arms.
“I said this was a compromise, didn’t I?” he said.
“So what do we do? Go eat or go home?”
He sighed and stepped away from the wall, shooting an anxious glance up and down the alley.
“Am I fit enough to go for dinner?” he asked.
I looked him over with a discerning eye. Of course everyone looked garish under streetlights in a dirty alley, but he looked OK. Eyes were less bloodshot and his hair was sexily messy thanks to my handiwork.
“Show me your ass,” I said to him, turning him around with my hands.
“Perry,” he admonished in fake shock but he let me twirl him. The back of his pants were all wet from sitting on the ground but luckily his black cargo jacket was long enough to cover most of it. He had quite the perky butt, which helped.
“I think you’ll pass,” I admitted. “I don’t know what Jenn’s going to think…”
“Who cares,” he said with a shrug and straightened up his collar.
“As long as you don’t,” I said sternly.
“I’ll be OK,” he said. He took a step forward, trying to walk away but I grabbed him and brought him closer to me. He was taken aback at my gruffness.
“You’re not allowed to lie to me anymore, you got it?” I said. “You tell me everything that’s going on. The next time you see Abby, you tell me, just as I would tell you. Just as I have told you. We’re in the same boat now. I don’t know what the fuck she’s doing here or what she wants, but it’s something and I don’t think she’s going to go away until she gets it. You…me, we both have to be prepared for this. Got it?”
He blinked hard and then eyed my Kung-Fu grip on his arm. “I’ve got it. Wow. Perry…when did you…”
“When did I what?” I challenged.
He smiled. It started off small and then spread across his face until the corners of his mouth cracked. “When did you start acting like me?”
I paused at that. But just for a second. Then I hoisted him forward (which was really just a foot) like I was throwing him against the wall. He laughed and trotted off toward the street. I joined him and we went to the restaurant, leaving the alley and Abby behind.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Dinner was a total chore. The restaurant was absurdly expensive, considering it was just “tapas” and we pretty much had to pay $50 each for a bunch of tiny appetizers and weak drinks. But neither Dex nor I made a peep about it. We had other things on our minds.
Their mutual friends, Sarah and Jorge, were nice enough. A yuppie couple who made it big on the internet back in the 90s. At least Jorge did. Sarah seemed to be his third wife, but she was Jenn’s college friend and there was a weird competition between them. Every time Sarah flattered Jorge on how well his stocks were doing, or whatever they were talking about, Jenn bristled all up like a porcupine and then mentioned how well Wine Babes was doing in the ratings. She never once mentioned Dex. I guess because Dex wasn’t technically doing all that well for himself, at least not financially. The truth was, Experiment in Terror had still yet to make it big, despite the copycats out there.
Dex seemed withdrawn and disinterested in the conversation and his food. Only his drinks got his attention. I was surprised that after three drinks, he was still as coherent as usual. I thought the Valium would have done more than make him see the ghost of his ex-girlfriend. But I suppose that was probably the worst side effect any medication could ever have.
I couldn’t help but think about Abby throughout the whole excursion. It made me think that the reason Dex was on medication was because he was seeing ghosts. But if that was the case, it was wrong, not to mention unfair. I saw ghosts too, but I wasn’t carted off to shrinks and prescribed shit. Why were ghosts seen as a mental illness instead of just fact? Or at least a fact that was accepted, if not understood? It seemed like cheating, kind of. Then again, I never knew why he was on his medication. I had Hasselback tell me, but Dex never actually answered that one. I made a mental note to ask him later.
I was also frightened about the whole thing. How long had Abby been trying to terrify him? Was she in his apartment every night for the past five-odd years? Or was she only there because I was there…because I was either weird competition, or because she knew my abilities. Maybe after years of trying to get through to Dex, she finally found someone who listened: Me. But why? What did she have left to say? Did she blame Dex for what happened to her? Was she out for revenge…or worse, whatever worse could be?
Yeah, I was terrible company and so was Dex. Jenn had to spend most of the meal handling the conversation. I didn’t feel bad for her, though. She was the one who saw her beloved sitting in an empty alleyway, head between his knees, hiding from a nightmare, and she acted like it wasn’t a big deal at all. I didn’t understand her one bit and I was liking her less and less by the second. I didn’t even think that was possible.
Unfortunately, whatever I thought about Jenn didn’t matter because as soon as dinner was over and we were back at the apartment, she scooted me into my room.
“Go put on something sexy, Perry,” she said throatily, her voice going all Scarlett Johansson again. She hadn’t forgotten about the whole clubbing thing.
I paused in the door, held my stance and looked at Dex fearfully. Not only did I not want to go clubbing, but I especially did not want to leave Dex alone in the apartment with Abby on the prowl.
But to my amazement, Dex said, “Just go, Perry, you’ll have fun.”
My mouth dropped. “Dex. I am not leaving you here!”
I froze when I realized what I’d said.
“Leave him here? What are you talking about?” Jenn asked, her voice building with each word.
I quickly looked at Dex. He gave me a very quick, poignant look that said “please don’t say anything.”
I took in a deep breath and somehow found the strength to smile at Jenn. “I mean, it’s not really fair to leave him here while we go out and have fun.”
“Phhfff,” Jenn said, waving her hand at him. She walked over to me and pushed me into my room. “You know he’d hate it. Now quickly get dressed.”
She shut the door. I was quickly enveloped in the dark but switched on the light before the terror seized me. Part of me could not leave Dex here, would not leave him. But the other part told me I just might have to. He was trying to save face and act like nothing was wrong.
Well, as long as I had time to myself in the room, I had time to switch his pills all back. Even though I was tempted to continue on with the experiment, I didn’t want to put him through any more terror or pain. Whatever his pills were for, the fact that I just switched some of them, the pills that had to do with delusions, it couldn’t have just been a coincidence. Whether it could be proved or not, I felt partly, if not fully, responsible for what happened in the alley.
I brought out my duffel bag from beside the bed and brought out all of my clothes, strewing them across the pistachio bed. I reached into the bottom of the bag. And found nothing but powder.
I opened the bag wider against the light and peeked in, my chest heaving. All the pills were crushed. There was nothing but a white and yellow powder lining the bottom of the bag. What the fuck?
My hands flew up to my mouth in horror. What happened? How did the pills get crushed? I thought about earlier when I was shoving clothes in my bag. I was rough, but not enough to crush a handful of pills. What the hell could have done that?
Then I looked at the bag again. The outside was covered with a lot of fine white hair. Dog hair. Could Fat Rabbit have stomped all over the bag? He didn’t seem big enough to do enough damage, but then again, his name started with the word “Fat” and he was known for pissing people off.
And that was the end of that idea. I couldn’t replace Dex’s pills with dust. I couldn’t do anything now but watch him unravel, watch his nerves fry as Abby came and did her worst.
But that couldn’t be it. It couldn’t be. It had to be a coincidence. How could pills prevent you from seeing ghosts? If that were true, wouldn’t I have been on something similar in high school…
I pushed that thought out of my head. I didn’t want to conjure up Jacob at a time like this. There were far more important things to worry about. Like Dex. And going clubbing with Jenn.
I sighed and quickly shoved on the skinny jeans I had, the raspberry heels and a plain white tank top. I didn’t bother with my face or my hair. I honestly did not care. In fact, if I could have covered myself with ghoulish makeup, I would have done so.
I opened the door (after shoving the duffel bag and its powdery evidence underneath the bed) and stepped out into the living room. Dex was gone, the door to the bedroom closed. Just Jenn stood in the living room, flipping through the TV stations.
At the sound of me, she turned around and gave me the once over. “Is that what you’re wearing?”
I looked down at myself. Suddenly the tune of “Makeover, Makeover” from Clone High rang through my head but luckily Jenn wasn’t on the same plane. She just nodded and said, “Whatever, it works.”
“Where’s Dex?” I asked, eyeing their door.
“Sleeping, reading, I don’t know,” she said and gestured for me to come forward. “Come on, let’s get going.”
I eyed the clock in the kitchen as I walked over to her. “It’s only ten. Are we in a rush?”
“No, no,” she said breezily, smiling at me. “Just getting a head start on the fun.”
She turned and walked to the door. I followed, suspicious of everything and everyone. I wanted nothing more than to go into Dex’s room and make sure he was OK, but I knew that would only get him in trouble. So I steadied my nerves and followed Jenn out the door.
We took a cab to the venue, since Jenn planned to get quite drunk. Those were her actual words on the elevator down: “I hope you know I’m going to get quite drunk, Perry.”
That was fine with me. I was curious to see how drunk Jenn would compare to sober Jenn. Maybe she was less bitchy, less selfish and more vulnerable.
Well, 20 minutes into our arrival at the douchiest nightclub in the Pacific Northwest, I found out that drunk Jenn was the same as sober Jenn. Just…amplified.
“I need another drink,” she said, trying to wave down the bartender who was doing quite a good job of ignoring us the whole time. The music was on a continuous suck cycle except for the occasional addition of Kylie Minogue or Lady Gaga. We were occasionally getting sized up by guys but neither of us had been hit on at this point.
I wasn’t surprised by this when it came to myself (I definitely wasn’t slutty enough) but I thought Jenn would have been approached at least a few times already. She was a Wine Babe after all, and she did get recognized quite often. Here, though, that wasn’t the case. And the drunker she got, the more she picked up on it.
“You’re so lucky, Perry,” she said, bringing my head out of another worrying daydream about Dex.
I frowned at her. “How do you mean?”
“Well look at you,” she said while chewing on her straw and waving at me up and down. “You could become as thin as I am and you’d still have boobs.”