Having convinced the woman to go back to her desk after letting her through, Katie has climbed two flights of stairs and is standing in the doorway of a room she hasn’t visited in several weeks. Nevertheless, it all still seems horribly familiar; even the figure in the armchair close to the window is exactly as she remembered him.
‘Hello, Dad,’ she says, placing a hand on the back of the chair as she moves alongside. His head is slumped against the high back and his mouth is partly open, as are his eyes, which, rather than looking at the beautiful sunset out of the window, seem to be focused on nothing. She wonders if he’s ever noticed this view. Even when she’d first moved him into this care home he was deteriorating so rapidly that she was certain she was spending all the money on nothing. Nothing other than her guilt.
‘I should have said these things to you before, a long time ago,’ she starts, her hand slipping from the back of the chair to his shoulder. There’s no response. ‘But I couldn’t…’ She creates a fist and twists her face, as if struggling even now to say what should be the simplest thing for a daughter to say to a dad who has given her everything. ‘I love you. I’ve always loved you. And it doesn’t matter what you’ve done.’ She leans in closer and lowers her voice to a whisper. ‘If you killed him, I know there was a reason.’
She’s distracted by a sound behind and spins round to find a man standing in the doorway. Instantly she can feel her cheeks flush. She’d almost forgotten how unattractive he is. He’s overweight, his hair is thinning and his features somehow look like they don’t fit the overall shape of his face. Yet when he smiles she finds herself smiling back, feeling a warmth spread through her that she’s only ever felt with Nathan.
‘Is everything okay?’
On his chest is a badge bearing the name ‘Martin Coates’, and below that the word ‘carer’. She remembers staring at that tag and, in particular, that word on the floor of the hotel she’d taken him to, her eyes struggling to focus from all the drink, her regret overwhelming.
‘I just wanted to see him.’
‘I thought that would be it. Barbara at the door,’ Martin gestures down, ‘told me it was police business. But I knew it would be something far more important.’
‘Listen, I need to speak to you,’ she says.
‘And me to you.’ Martin’s voice has always been very quiet, his words slow and measured. ‘I want to apologise, Katie, I’m appalled at what I did.’
She very nearly laughs at the suggestion that he had been the one to blame. ‘Why?’
‘Because of the job I do; because it’s clear I abused my connection with…’ Martin looks across at Katie’s dad, who is oblivious, she’s certain, to the conversation they’re having. ‘Otherwise you would never have…’ He turns his attention back to her, his rounded face starting to redden as he removes thick glasses and rubs his eyes. ‘Not with someone like me.’
‘That’s not true. It’s not your job. It’s who you are. It’s who you’ve proven you are with all the help you’ve given Dad.’
He smiles and puts his glasses back on. ‘I’m glad you think that.’
‘I haven’t been here for him myself,’ she says, the words catching in her throat.
‘We’ve spoken about this before,’ says Martin, taking a step forward and lightly resting a hand on the top of her arm. ‘There is no blame here. It’s a natural reaction, an understandable fear.’
‘Maybe,’ Katie says, squeezing the bridge of her nose as if that might stop the tears. Her phone starts to ring and she pulls it out quickly, wondering if it’s Nathan, before reminding herself that he had been left a prisoner in her home.
She raises an apologetic hand to Martin and then turns away, answering the call. ‘Hi, Mike. What’s up?’
‘Sorry to disturb you, boss, I just wanted to check you were doing okay.’
She wipes the tears from her cheeks. ‘I’m fine, thanks.’
‘And what about Nathan?’
‘He’s okay,’ she says, taking another step away from Martin, before looking back over her shoulder and finding that he’s gone. ‘Again, thanks for asking. You’re the only one that has.’
‘You know about my brother,’ he says, lowering his voice to a whisper. ‘You know what I’ve been through with him.’
Katie remembers the day from just a few months ago, when she’d been taken out to a run-down estate to visit a drug addict that looked so much like the sergeant that no explanation had been needed. It was proof of his trust that he was willing to show her. It was also, she can see now, a warning about the effect all the drinking and the sleeping around might have on her own life.
‘You remember what Nathan used to be like.’ She pauses as the images come into focus. ‘When he was doing his thing, it was like he travelled somewhere else, but you could see he was finding it harder and harder to come back. It’s the same with…’ She reaches out and places a hand on her dad’s shoulder. He hasn’t moved in the chair. ‘I’m sorry,’ she says, having drawn in a deep breath.
‘Don’t be,’ says DS Peters. ‘Your dad was a good man.’
‘And you’re too good a detective, Mike,’ she says, acknowledging his understanding. She finds herself straightening, muscles firming, barriers rising. ‘Now, what more do we know? Anything on the phone number for Christian?’
‘Nothing yet.’
‘What about CCTV of the house?’
‘Again, nothing. A couple of the neighbours have cameras, but we haven’t had a chance to run through it all.’
‘And the family doctor that Nathan spoke of? Any joy with him?’
‘Some. We know he was living in Spain until a little over four years ago. Then he was marked coming back through Heathrow. Nothing after that.’
‘Nobody reported him missing?’
‘As far as we can tell there’s no family or friends. He was living out there as a recluse, pretty much. We’re still working on tracking down former colleagues to see why he left, and to find out what sort of guy he was.’
‘If Nathan’s experience with his dad is anything to go by, not great at his job. What about his medical or dental records? We might not have to wait for the lab if they can get back to us with something first.’
‘If you’re in a hurry for forensics it might be best not to piss off the doctor,’ says DS Peters. ‘I hear you had another clash. He says you threatened him.’
‘Absolutely,’ she says. ‘After he’d told Mark Brooks about Christian.’
‘As you probably should have done yourself.’
‘I was choosing the right time.’
‘For him, or for Nathan?’
She feels a flash of temper; the rarest of things with DS Peters. ‘Nathan wants what I want.’ The knot in her stomach tightens. ‘Jesus, if you only knew what he was putting himself through right now.’
‘What do you mean? Is he not with you?’
She hesitates for a moment, weighing up the need to lie. ‘No. But he’s not leaving my flat, I can promise you that.’
‘So where are you?’
‘I came to visit my dad.’
‘Then I’m sorry I disturbed you.’
‘Don’t be. I was just leaving.’
‘Don’t suppose you have time for a detour on your way home?’
Katie looks at her watch. She has more than an hour before she’s due back at her flat. ‘What do you need?’
‘PC Smith and I went to talk to Markham, but he wouldn’t let us in. He’s obviously badly shaken after discovering what Christian had done. He said he would only speak to you. Now, I don’t mind driving over there as well. I can stay in the car.’
‘I’m better on my own, thanks, Mike. You know what I get like at times like these.’
‘I’m counting on it,’ he says, with a laugh.
‘What about the super? Is he going to be all right with me doing this?’
‘He doesn’t need to know.’
‘I don’t want you getting in trouble.’
‘I’m far too old to worry about that. Between you and me, I think this might be one of my last.’
‘I doubt I’ll have that choice.’