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Jokertown: Rectory, Our Lady of Perpetual Mystery
Father Squid’s rectory was suffused with the peace of the monastery. Fortunato felt that he’d found an oasis of tranquility after nearly two days of travel and re-immersion in the strangeness of Jokertown. It was a small room in a small cottage attached to a church that had been abandoned by the Catholic diocese sometime in the 1960’s after they’d pulled out of Jokertown without regard for the souls of their vastly changed parishioners. Somehow it felt very much like home.
After enjoying a glass of mellow, surprisingly tasty wine in the rectory, Father Squid took Fortunato on a quick tour of his church, which after several years of reconstruction still wasn’t quite up to snuff.
“We’re doing the best we can,” Father Squid said as if reading Fortunato’s thoughts. He gestured at the scaffolds half-holding up one of the interior walls, the flooring that was partly warped plywood, the mismatched pews that must have come from half a dozen other forgotten churches. “But money is tight. And I hesitate to spend it all on building projects when so much has to be done for the parish poor. Meals for the elderly, or those incapable of taking care of themselves. Money for heating oil in the winter. A small camp we send joker children to in the summer, so they might know what sunshine and forests and clean lake water feels like.” The priest shook his head ponderously. “Never enough time. Never enough money.”
Fortunato nodded. He felt ashamed. He would have felt worse if he’d let himself dwell on it. Here he’d spent sixteen years gazing at his own navel, while this fat old joker was out in the real world, trying to make a difference. He looked around the church’s interior. It was nowhere as nice as the old Our Lady of Perpetual Misery. Fortunato particularly missed the icons that had been part of the old church. The old representations had been genuine works of art. Their replacements...
Fortunato frowned as he looked at them closely.
“I know,” Father Squid said, sadly. “We lost much that night Our Lady of Perpetual Misery burned to the ground. Many parishioners. But also some things nearly as irreplaceable as human beings.” He gestured at the mosaic upon the walls. The two headed male/female joker crucified on the DNA helix; the handsome, golden-auraed demon juggling his thirty pieces of silver; the two-faced scientist in his lab coat dispensing pain with one hand and relief with the other; the thin black man with curling ram horns and a bulging forehead hurling thunderbolts as he floated in the air. Another part of him bulged inhumanly large in his pants. “Crude as they are, these will have to do until a joker artist with more ability comes along.”
Fortunato stared at the mural. The thin black man with curling ram horns and a bulging forehead hurling thunderbolts looked familiar. “That’s me,” he said, half fascinated, half horrified.
Father Squid smiled. At least, his facial tentacles twitched. “It’s what your legend has become, my son.”
“And that is?” Fortunato asked, still unable to take his eyes off the mural.
Father Squid shrugged broad shoulders. “Like most things in Jokertown, theology is two-faced. You’ve become the fertility god who showers both fecundity and destruction upon his people. Pregnant jokers pray to you that their children be normal. Or at least not hideous. On the other hand, you’ve become a cult figure to certain of those with a destructive bent. Youth gangs in particular.”
“The Jokka Bruddas,” Fortunato said.
Father Squid nodded. “Among others. I deal with them frequently. Their clubhouse, as they call it, is an abandoned apartment building just across the street—”
“Excuse me,” Fortunato said, as his cell phone went off. He fumbled with it for a moment, unfamiliar was he was with the controls, but finally got it working. “Yes?”
“Fortunato?” a familiar, frenzied voice asked. “Digger,” it said, before Fortunato could reply. “Have you heard the news?”
“News?” Fortunato looked at Father Squid. Father Squid shrugged. He shrugged back.
“There was some kind of dust-up in Vegas. Your son’s been kidnapped.”
“Kidnapped?” he heard himself repeating stupidly.
“Yeah, and Peregrine, she... she was hurt. Apparently she’s been flown back to New York and is at the Jokertown Clinic—”
“This must have happened hours ago! Why didn’t you find out about it until now?”
“I was busy, all right?” Digger said defensively.
“Busy doing what?” Fortunato asked.
“Writing up your story at my apartment—then my girlfriend came by and one thing led to another, and I just turned on the TV—”
Fortunato caught himself about to swear, then shut his mouth. He took a deep breath and ran through the Heart Sutra a couple of times. He didn’t feel any calmer when he was finished, but he realized that it was all water under the bridge and there was no use crying over it.
“All right,” he said. He checked with the map of Jokertown that was still etched into the furrows of his brain. “I’m going to the Jokertown Clinic—”
“I’ll meet you there—”
“If you want.”
”I’m on the way. Keep the channel open and I’ll fill you in on the details.”
“All right,” Fortunato said. He turned to Father Squid. “I have to go,” he said.
The priest nodded ponderously. “God go with you, my son.”
Fortunato nodded as he ran out of the church, Digger still yammering in his ear.