Alien in the House

Chapter 74



JEFF SIGHED as he sat down next to me. “Lay it on me.”

“Okay, Dad and I just finished reading all these bills, every one of the bills the Speaker gave you to go over, the ones that will go to vote in the first week of January.”

Jeff nodded. “Yeah, I know. I don’t know why you two read them. That’s my job. Now, I mean.”

“Let’s make sure we’re on the same page. Bills are legislation going through the House or the Senate.” Schoolhouse Rock was coming back to me with a vengeance. “A congressman introduces a bill, for whatever reason. Many times the reasons are good, like to give teachers and schools more money.”

“But many times, they’re not,” Dad said. “Some bills are restrictive in their nature, such as bills about illegal immigration.”

Jeff nodded. “Right. Bills go to committee. This got explained to me when they shoved the job on me and then again earlier today. The different committees take the bills, research them, and make their recommendations. Sometimes they table the bill, which means they get rid of it, sometimes the committee favors the bill and sends it up for a vote. And all bills get debated somewhere along the way.”

“They also get amended along the way, which is where many politicians, lobbyists, and special interest groups come in to try to use their influence to affect the bill,” Dad said.

“Right,” I added. “The former Diplomatic Corps used their influence to, supposedly, ensure that bills and other actions going through Congress were doing things to help, versus harm, the A-Cs.”

“Okay, so someone wants to affect the bill. So the committee says no.”

“The committee doesn’t always say, no, Jeff,” Dad said. “Sometimes the committee agrees with what the lobbyist wants. And then they amend the bill. Sometimes they amend or change a bill about, say, protecting butterflies, with a single line forbidding the sale of alcohol in every state in the union.”

“Why is that allowed?” Jeff sounded worried now.

“Because that’s the way things work. Think about the Cabal of Evil. Lillian Culver represents a lot of big defense contractors. Let’s say you’re on the Defense Committee. She’s going to want to wine and dine you, so to speak, in order to influence your putting in something in the bill that suggests that you must use one of her clients. No biggie, right? I mean, they’re established defense contractors, buy American, sort of thing.”

“Okay, but that’s obvious, and there would be opposing sides on every committee. Someone would catch it and stop it.”

“Love your faith in the political system. And maybe that would happen. But let’s say that you’re on the Education Committee. Lillian still wines and dines you, and convinces you that her clients will give money to the schools if you’ll just get this one line in requiring that all schools have to have, say Titan Security instead of local police providing protection. You agree, and either slip it in or passionately argue the case for the committee, and the committee buys in and puts the line in willingly.”

“I can see how that would be dangerous, but even if the committee went for it, so what? These things get debated in session. That’s where something like what Sol just described could be stopped.”

“Only if everyone’s read it or someone brings up the line about forbidding alcohol in every state or having Titan Security in every school.” I held up one of the bills. “These things are humongous by the time they’re done and go to the Floor of the House or the Senate for a vote. And not everyone reads them. Many rely on the committees to make their recommendations and then they vote accordingly.”

Jeff nodded slowly. “And many who vote will think they’re voting for the obvious parts of the bill, not the sneaky stuff. So, every bill needs to be read carefully. That’s the job, isn’t it? At least a big part of it, I mean. To read every bill that comes your way?”

I dropped the stack of bills in his lap. “You’re an A-C. You can read at hyperspeed. I don’t believe every single representative is going to read every word, let alone find the line that Dad and I found, over and over again, in a plethora of legislative bills that have almost nothing to do with each other, and also almost nothing to do with the line being snuck in.”

“I’d agree with that in general,” Tito said, as he and Nurse Carter joined us. “But not for one in particular. We can guarantee that Santiago Reyes read every bill that he was given. And I’d bet he found the same things you did.”

“What did you all find?” Jeff asked. “I’m obviously the only one not clued in.”

I held up the last bill, which I still had in my hand. “This bill is supposedly about making the nation’s schools better. But get a load of this particular sentence—and really pay attention, because Dad and I found this or close to it in every one of the bills now sitting in your lap.”

“Edge of our seats,” Jeff said, sarcasm knob only at a sleepy six on the scale.

“You will be. I think Tito and Magdalena are already aware. From the middle of a paragraph describing school bus specifications in extremely boring detail, we have this gem: No aliens not naturally from Earth shall be allowed to overrule any U.S. state or federal government law, mandate, or directive, now or in perpetuity.”

We were all quiet for a few long moments. Tito cleared his throat. “That’s what Santiago was doing. He had a listing of every bill and the specific anti-alien lines from them. He had the ones about human illegals called out, too. This shouldn’t surprise anyone in the room, but there were a lot less of those than the ones clearly put in to cover the A-Cs both of Earth and elsewhere.”

“I understand why this is bad, but what does it all mean?” Nurse Carter asked.

Seemed obvious to me. “It means we know why all the representatives are being killed.”