Normally, my sister would jump all over the opportunity to gossip with me about interesting people, but she’s chewing her lip, acting like she’s not sure that she wants to.
“What’s up? What are you thinking? ’Fess up, sister, or I will be forced to withhold muffins.” I snatch one up and hold it by my shoulder.
“Ozzie has told me some things about Toni’s past, but I’m pretty sure it’s not something he’d want me to discuss.”
Of all the things that May has said or done since she met Ozzie, this one makes the biggest impression on me. She has never kept a secret from me in our entire lives as far as I know. Until now. It makes me both sad and happy.
May throws a big muffin crumb at me. “Why are you looking at me like that? You look like I just slapped you across the face or something.”
I pick the crumb off my shirt and throw it back at her. “No, I’m just thinking how much it sucks when your baby sister grows up and leaves the nest.”
“Oh, that’s so sweet,” she says in a mocking tone, right before going totally serious. “What the hell are you talking about?”
I unwrap the muffin slowly as I respond to her command. “Dev and I were talking, and he was sharing his opinion about you with me, and it really got me thinking about a lot of things.”
“Like . . . ?”
“Like, how I’ve always looked at you as my baby sister, as somebody who I needed to protect. But how, now that we’re older and we have our own lives, that’s not an accurate picture of who you are or who I need to be.”
“Uh-huh . . .”
I sigh in frustration. “I don’t know if Dev is some sort of guru or whatever, but every time I talk to him, I feel like I get a clearer picture of who I am and what my life is all about.”
I feel sad about the next part. Admitting it out loud is harder than just thinking it inside my own head. “And I don’t necessarily like everything that I’m seeing. I feel like I’ve been afraid of way too many things for way too long, and I’ve basically become a turtle hiding in a shell, letting an adventurous life pass me by. I guess that’s why I feel so conflicted right now about Bourbon Street Boys, about the kids, about the whole dating thing . . .”
“It sounds like you’re having a midlife crisis.”
I shake my head. “No, I don’t think it’s that. I don’t have the urge to go out and buy a Corvette or date an eighteen-year-old or anything. But am I ready to jump into being a freelancer with a security firm? I don’t know. This job has really changed you, May, and I have to believe you see that.”
She nods. “I do. But I think they’re all good changes. And what do my changes have to do with you? We’d be doing different jobs. You could work from home most of the time. It’s not the same thing.”
“I agree they’re good changes in you. Now I do, anyway. I didn’t agree last week, but after getting to know the team a little bit better, and seeing them in action, I realize the big attraction. I see why you’re excited about going to work in the morning, and I also see why you find Ozzie so attractive. He’s confident, he’s smart, and he’s very loyal.”
“And he’s awesome in bed. Don’t forget that part.” She can’t stop grinning.
“You and I both know that’s not the reason you’re with him. But it is a nice side benefit.”
May gets a far-off, misty look in her eye that I’m almost jealous of. I quickly move the conversation forward to keep from dwelling on anything negative. I’m thrilled she’s so happy.
“Anyway, it’s been nice having Dev to talk to, and I think I could really have fun with him as a friend, so even if that’s all that’s going on between us, I’m happy.”
“I’m happy for you too.” May smiles. “You guys could make a cute couple, though.”
I shake my head. “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. We just met each other last week.”
“So? Love at first sight is a real thing. Trust me, I know.”
I laugh. “You told me, when you met Ozzie, you thought he was a hideous beast-man with that beard of his. You said he was completely and totally ugly. That was no love-at-first-sight situation, no way.”
May frowns at me. “That impression lasted only about ten minutes. Once he shaved, and I saw how amazing he was, I was done. I fell for him like a rock.”
I roll my eyes. “Whatever.”
May crumples up her muffin paper. “So, did you find anything good on those computer files or whatever you went after the other night?”
“Well, I should probably save this for the briefing later today, but I did find some stuff on the clone drives last night after the kids fell asleep.”
May sits up really straight in her chair. “Really? Tell me.”
I lean in, excited about what I found after working into the wee hours of the morning. “There’s somebody there at Blue Marine who sits at station number three, named Anita, who’s been messing around with the accounts. I haven’t shared everything with Lucky yet about it.”