Lucy straightened, tears sliding silently down her cheeks. She wondered if her heart was slowly breaking, whether such a thing was even possible. In less than a day, she’d seen more men die than she could ever have imagined. She wondered if this was why her mother had silently agreed with her father, never interrupted when he had made it so clear that women shouldn’t be doctors, and that she’d never have the stomach or strength to be a nurse on the front line. But she refused to think of caring as being weak. It should hurt to lose a patient, and she refused to think any other way, no matter how painful it was.
‘Ambulance hit!’
Lucy heard the boom of gunfire before the call, dropping the bandages she was holding, ready to run. She was close to the entrance, to where the ambulances were arriving. She held her breath, terrified of what she was about to see. As she emerged, there was smoke everywhere, thick and acrid. She held her hand to her mouth, started to cough, choke, until the smoke began to slowly clear like fog – and then she simply froze.
The ambulance had been hit; she could see the vehicle on its side through the haze, not so far from where she was standing. But it was the woman’s body on the ground near her that made her stop moving, made her scream silently, filling her own head with a piercing noise even though she knew no sound came from her mouth.
‘We’ve lost nurses!’ came a shout.
Lucy only took a moment to gather herself, thinking nothing of her own life, of the danger facing her, as she sprinted forward. She bent, turned the young, motionless nurse over, her tin hat discarded, blonde hair etched with blood.
‘Help!’ Lucy screamed.
It felt like a lifetime even though she knew it was only minutes, as she held the hand of the other nurse, staring into eyes that were slowly starting to focus. And then there were men around her: doctors, orderlies, she didn’t know. She did her best to help lift the other woman, ran alongside them and into the hospital as the noise of gunfire echoed around them. She cringed at the sound of an explosion. Would she ever make it home alive?
CHAPTER FIVE
Scarlet
Sussex
‘If I have to march again or crawl through barbed wire, I’m going to scream.’
Scarlet laughed at Ellie’s moan, but the truth was she felt the same. They’d scaled ropes, marched for what felt like hours, been trained in self-defence and slept on the ground. She knew that once they were stationed somewhere, they were going to have to deal with tiring conditions, but for now it seemed unnecessary. Besides, they’d all already endured so much training before arriving here. Never in a million years had she imagined doing anything like this; it was so far removed from the life she knew it was laughable. Anyone who’d known her at home never would have believed what she was truly capable of. Even though she knew some of her friends would be stepping outside their comfort zones to help in factories or the local Red Cross, none of them would be doing anything like what she’d volunteered for.
‘We’ll be well prepared for anything,’ Scarlet replied, instead of sharing her own concerns.
‘I say we run away and find that place with the hot baths.’
Scarlet knew exactly what Ellie was talking about. They’d been in Sussex four days now, and some of the other nurses had already visited the surrounding farms. Rumour had it that an old retired colonel was taking pity on some of the nurses and offering hot water, and she was tempted to go and find out herself whether it was true or not.
‘Before dinner?’ Scarlet asked.
Ellie nodded. ‘Maybe he’ll feed us, too. Would have to be better than the slop we get here.’
Scarlet shuddered just thinking about the food they’d been eating. The poor cooks had to make four meals a day for them – but on normal civilian rations, it was almost impossible.
‘I’m dreaming of eggs. And chicken. And fruit,’ Scarlet muttered.
‘Oooh and tea with fresh milk and sugar.’
Scarlet shut her eyes, almost able to taste it. ‘Stop teasing me. I can’t stand even thinking about food.’
‘Dinner will be served promptly at six o’clock,’ Matron barked at them.
‘I think we all know that already,’ Ellie muttered loudly.
Scarlet waited for them to be reprimanded, but it seemed they hadn’t been heard, and soon they were trooping off after the other nurses. When they reached their tent they both retrieved their towels and toiletries, tucking them into tight balls under their arms.
‘Are we going to ask anyone to join us?’ Scarlet asked.
‘No way. Come on.’
Scarlet followed Ellie’s lead, keeping her head down, not wanting to catch any of the other nurses’ eyes. They’d made some lovely friends, often chatting to many of the other women, but if they were going to have any chance of a bath, it was better if there were only two of them.
‘Cathy said he is a kindly older man, and he fetched water for them straight away.’
‘Sometimes I wonder if they’re just teasing us. The thought of hot water . . .’ Scarlet sighed, not bothering to finish her sentence. ‘I think it’s what I miss the most. I can’t decide whether it’s decent food or being scrubbed clean.’
The countryside was beautiful. With the oak trees swaying gently high above them, and the green grass stretching as far as they could see, it was almost impossible to believe they were at war. That their men were away fighting, dying; that they were going to be stationed somewhere so different, so soon.
Ellie walked along beside her, and when Scarlet glanced over she saw that her friend was looking around, too, probably thinking the same thing. It was somehow so idyllic in the midst of such chaos. They kept moving through a more forested area and over a fence that divided the properties.
‘Are you ladies lost?’ a deep, well-spoken man’s voice said from nowhere.
Scarlet jumped and grabbed hold of Ellie’s wrist. A soldier was leaning against a tree, boots crossed as he lit up a cigarette. His uniform made it clear that he was a commanding officer. He was watching them, squinting into the sun, one side of his mouth turned up in a smile.
‘No, not lost,’ Scarlet replied, chin up, refusing to let him see what a fright he’d given her.
Ellie gently tugged on her wrist and Scarlet folded her arms for something to do.
‘I’m guessing that you’re looking for a house that gives pretty nurses hot baths?’
Ellie laughed and that made the soldier laugh, too. Scarlet tried hard to keep a straight face.
‘Are we that easy to read?’ she asked.
He grinned again, and he seemed so at ease that Scarlet softened, letting herself smile back. She didn’t know why she’d been so taken aback in the first place. He was handsome and friendly, and she needed to relax more. Things were different here from what she was used to back home.
‘I hate to tell you, but you’re second in line already,’ he said, pushing off from the tree and stepping forward. ‘Another two nurses scurried past earlier, but I’m sure they’ll be almost done.’
‘Are you just standing here on nurse watch then?’ Ellie asked, swapping glances with Scarlet, her eyebrows raised.
‘No, I’m keeping an eye out for deserters. You aren’t one of those, are you?’
‘There are people running away?’ Scarlet asked. ‘Surely not here!’