‘Yes,’ I say. ‘Is there medication? Or some kind of therapy we could enrol Leo in?’
‘No, I’m afraid not in this case. The “cure” is time and patience.’ Leo and I both sigh. ‘Now for the good news,’ Craig continues. ‘You can travel whenever you’re ready – but only by air ambulance. You’re not in any shape to attempt a commercial flight.’
‘I’ll organise a medical crew for our jet,’ I say, and Craig nods, but Leo laughs weakly and says dryly, ‘Of course. “Our jet” – how could I forget?’
I hate the sarcasm and it’s an immediate reminder of how things used to be between us, unsettling me more than it should. ‘Do you want to go home, or not?’ I snap, and I immediately feel the doctors’ eyes on me. I flush, and then work hard to follow up my sharp tone with a gentle explanation: ‘It belongs to my parents, but I can still use it. We can get home whenever we want to – if you want to, Leo.’
As the doctors prepare to leave, I tell Leo that I need to visit the bathroom and on my way out, I hand him the box of supplì. As soon as Craig steps out, I waylay him in the corridor.
‘How are you holding up, Molly?’
‘I’m okay,’ I say. ‘I just wanted to ask your advice.’
‘Happy to help if I can.’
‘We were…’ I freeze up when I try to say the words to explain our situation. I don’t want to admit the terrible mess we’ve made of things, not even to this doctor whom I will soon bid farewell to and never see again. ‘You said to keep him calm. How calm did you mean? There’s so much that he has forgotten, I don’t even know where to start. I just don’t know what to tell him.’
‘I’m inclined to suggest that you trust your instincts. I think you’ll know when he’s ready to hear the things you need to tell him.’
I stare at the floor, trying to figure out what that will look like in practice. Craig adds gently, ‘I think you need to ask yourself what he needs to know, Molly. Your role between now and when he’s well again will be one of tour guide – let him experience the world again for himself, but give him the information he needs to understand it.’
I take a moment to collect myself, and when I return to his room I find Leo busily eating the supplì. He’s sitting up in bed more easily now, not leaning into the pillows anymore. There’s a newspaper on the table beside him. Leo is definitely on his way back.
‘These are amazing,’ he says.
‘There’s a wonderful pizzeria between the hospital and my hotel. I’ve had more carbs in the last two weeks than I’ve had in the last year. It will be so good to get home.’
‘But where will I go? Surely rehabilitation centres have waiting lists.’
This has occurred to me too, but I have a back-up plan. If we can’t find Leo a suitable place, we’ll have to get therapists to come to us. He would have to move into my apartment, though – his house has too many stairs.
‘Money talks, Leo. It’ll be fine.’
We both fall silent for a moment, then Leo pushes the box of supplì towards me. I take one. ‘You said you’d remembered something,’ I prompt.
‘I remembered meeting you a few times, when we were talking about Declan. When you mentioned it earlier, I had a…’ He struggles for words, then says, ‘It was just like… maybe like déjà vu? It was familiar, as if it had been there all along but I’d forgotten how to access it.’ He hesitates again, and then mutters, ‘Very hard to explain. But I do remember thinking…’ Leo pauses, and seems to select his next words very carefully. ‘I remember thinking that, if I’d met someone like you under any other circumstances, I might have asked you out.’
‘How far do these new memories extend?’
‘There was certainly nothing romantic going on in what I’ve remembered so far.’
‘Do you remember the night we met up for a drink at Darling Harbour?’ He frowns, pauses to concentrate, then sighs in frustration and shakes his head.
‘Do you think you could take me there?’ he asks suddenly. ‘To Darling Harbour – and maybe some other places we went together – you know – if I’m allowed out once we get back to Sydney, and if the memories still aren’t back.’
I glance at him quizzically. I don’t know how I feel about the idea. It makes sense to take Leo to some of our old haunts, but this is hard enough already without literally taking myself back to remember the things we’ve lost. I remind myself that the most important thing is for him to be well, and even if it’s a little uncomfortable for me to revisit those days, he has been such an important part of my life. I need to do what I can to help him.
‘Sure, if you think it’ll help.’