But then he didn’t.
I feel like I’m a lamb, and he’s a wolf. But at the same time, I feel like he doesn’t want to be. He’s caged, when he should be wild, and I don’t think he knows what to do about it.
The room is silent as we listen to his song, and I’m more emotionally charged by the minute. My past wells up in me, my present, my future. None of it looks good and then the music stops and my emotions pause.
Dare pushes the bench back, and he walks straight for me. My heart pounds as he bends, his lips close enough to graze my neck.
I remember those lips. The way they feel soft, yet firm. The way he tastes of spearmint.
“You smell like apples.” His whisper is low. I close my eyes for a scant second, because an apple is what destroyed Eden.
I open my eyes.
“I’m sorry I was rude earlier. This is just so goddamned hard for me.”
I know.
God, I know.
“Meet me in the garden tonight and I’ll make it up to you. Midnight.”
I glance up at him and I’m brave, but my bravery will get me eaten. Whether he wants to be or not, he’s a wolf.
And I’m a lamb.
Dare walks away, because it doesn’t matter to him what anyone thinks.
Dare does what he wants.
He lives free.
* * *
Midnight comes quickly.
I swing the gate open and tread inside among the night lilies, evening primrose and moonflowers. This garden is filled with things that are vibrant during the day and opulent at night. It is a small piece of paradise in the middle of a frightening place, and my mother had loved it. And so do I.
“Hey.”
He’s here already, and he lingers in the shadows, so at home in the night.
It reminds me of something my brother scribbled in his journal.
Nocte liber sum. By night I am free.
Am I free here with Dare?
“Hey,” I answer, internally commending myself on my eloquence. “You’re early.”
“I wanted to be ready.”
His voice is velvet, and it wraps around me like a blanket.
“What do you want with me, Dare?” I ask him honestly, because at the moment, I don’t know. He’s hot and cold, a distinct puzzle and I can’t put him together.
“I can’t do this anymore, Calla. It’s too hard to watch you, to stay away from you….” his voice trails off. “We’ve been through so much already. Don’t do this to us now.”
“So again, I ask you, what do you want from me?” my words are simple, and I don’t know what I’m doing.
Like always.
“That’s a loaded question,” he tells me as I approach and he watches my body as I move. I swallow hard because his expression is heavy and dark, and it’s meant for me.
He’s staring at me like he wants to eat me, and I am once again reminded that he’s a wolf.
“So give me a loaded answer,” I suggest, and my words surprise me and Dare.
What am I doing?
What am I doing?
His eyes widen, then narrow.
Dare practically growls as he yanks me to him, and he’s hard against my body. I sigh into his mouth and he groans.
Sensations blur and conscious thought ceases.
Consequences be damned.
Sweet Lord.
Dare’s tongue plunders my own and I’ve never felt so sexily invaded in my life. God, I’ve missed this. I’ve missed him.
So much,
So much,
So much.
It’s like every nerve ending in my entire body has exploded, like I’m standing on fire, like I’m fire itself. I’m ore, I’m magma, I’m lava. I’m melted, I’m the sun.
He’s ignited me.
His hands clutch me, big and strong and splayed against my back, and I somehow feel like I’m balanced in his hands, like he’s holding me steady.
Maybe he is.
Maybe he always has.
My head falls back and he slides his lips along my neck, grazing the soft skin, inhaling my scent.
“You smell like apples,” he tells me again, his voice husky in my ear. I feel urgent and rushed and desperate, yet his voice is even, controlled. I don’t know how he’s managing.