“She’s not-”
“She doesn’t feel it either way. He’s a nice man and he’ll treat her well, we all know that. I just hope my Matching is different,” she said, sadness ringing in her voice.
In Wetherdon a Matching ceremony was held twice a year, once in the spring after the Equinox and once in the autumn following the Harvest. When women came of age they were eligible to put themselves forward for the biddings, or rather, their parents put them forward. Daughters weren’t particularly valued in the city…even the wealthiest.
“I’m sure it will be,” I reassured her. “Remember, you’re prettier than all of the women this side of the ocean. I bet you’ll have the largest collection of suitors to choose from.”
“You’ve never even travelled outside the city,” she laughed.
“I don’t need to. I just know, okay?” I stuck my chin out firmly.
“I believe you’d also get a handsome suitor,” Kaela poked.
Even if I wanted to be Matched, I couldn’t. Father had always said that my destiny was never to be stuck with someone in town. He said I was different. I had duties; potential…and yet he never let me leave.
“So,” I changed the subject quickly, “what brings you up to see me? Other than escaping your sister, I mean.”
“Oh, right. I was coming to see you about the Equinox tomorrow. I thought that since your brother’s been trading it meant your father is still away, and you might be able to come with me this time.” Kaela twiddled her fingers playfully.
I mirrored her smile. For years I’d wanted to go to the celebration but Father had always said no: there were too many people, it was dangerous to go, blah, blah, blah. Excitement flooded through me. Kaela was right. I could go this year. Just as I’d opened my mouth to respond a voice cut across the room and footsteps stomped into the kitchen.
“She’ll not be going this year either,” Roan interrupted.
“What?” I piped. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, you’re not going. Richard may not be here but I’m watching over you and your brother until he gets back. This is what we talked about.”
“Then come with me. We’ll celebrate it together,” I snapped.
“There’ll be too many people.”
“But-”
“That’s enough, Ava,” he said gruffly. “My word is final and I’ll hear no more of it.”
I released a frustrated cry and slammed my hands down on the table. “The old Roan would have let me go. He would have come with me to drink and dance until dawn.” I knew I was being childish but I said it anyway. “I should have let you leave.”
My words hurt him. That was clear as he sneered. “The old Roan isn’t here anymore. Get used to it,” he said sharply.
My tears threatened to spill over when Kaela cleared her throat. “I think I’ll take my leave. My sister will probably need someone to yell at.” Her face was strewn with pity and frustration and it made me do something utterly out of character.
I ran and hugged her close, bringing my mouth close to her ear. “I’ll meet you tomorrow afternoon,” I whispered, barely loud enough for her to hear. Kaela hid her smile and continued her act of melancholy.
“Perhaps next year if your keepers finally set you free,” she said, shooting Roan a dirty look. “Such a shame, the tailor’s wares are quite spectacular this time of year too.” She batted her eyelashes and snapped her fan open again. “I’ll see you soon.” Kaela flashed me a toothy grin and walked back out to her brother.
A bitter silence then fell between Roan and me as I tried to keep a cap on my anger. “Happy now?” I managed. The bitterness in my voice returned quickly and before he could respond I was running upstairs.
He tried to follow but I slammed the bedroom door behind me. He knocked and tried to explain himself as I changed into a shirt and trousers. My pack was under the bed; the dagger on the dresser I sheathed at my thigh, and there was wire in the kitchen. Even though I was planning on going to the celebration, the fury still bubbled beneath my skin and I had to do something useful: to move; to trap; to hunt. Roan babbled behind me as I brushed past him in the hall, shouldering a thick cloak as we passed the pile of them. Down the stairs, I grabbed the wire from under the sink. Bread and cheese in the pack, and I all but ran out of the door. Roan called after me.
“Where are you going?”
“To do something useful,” I bit back.
Off I went, into the deep, dark woods.
CHAPTER FIVE
MY ANGER EVAPORATED once I’d reached the deep forest. The fresh bite of wind and whisper of the trees filled me with a sense of peace that I could find nowhere else. Sometimes I used to believe that I belonged here, amongst the greenery and wilderness, but people didn’t belong there. Above me the sun glittered through the mess of branches, and mud squelched beneath my feet. The usual path was worn and familiar to me, each step throwing me back to relive hundreds of the same journey. Familiarity, repetition, routine; I was sick of it.
Perhaps that was the reason I strayed from the path.
An hour passed, maybe two, by the time I stopped recognising anything around me. That alone should have made me anxious beyond belief but it didn’t, it felt refreshing. For once in my life I was lost. The close clutter of trees and bushes suggested that it was not a place that had been explored by many. Rabbits skittered through my legs and birds swooped close to my head, singing sweet songs as they flew past. I whistled one or two of them. Then things started to feel different.
The deeper I walked, the darker the forest got. The canopy of branches and leaves above had remained constant, neither growing nor depleting in quantity. As though the light itself was afraid to enter. It wasn’t long until I was stumbling over roots and catching my clothes on large bramble bushes. I cursed whatever part of me thought it was a good idea to venture into the woods without a box of matches or a lantern. Then again, I hardly thought I’d be out long enough to need such things.