My jaw nearly hit the ground. “You are?”
“I was angry and frustrated and so, so pissed off. I took all of that out on you. Whether or not you think it’s your fault, you didn’t deserve how I treated you.”
“Heidi, my firecracker,” I said with a chuckle, “I could never love you less for yelling at me.”
I took a step toward her, and she took one back.
“But I can’t do this.”
“What?” I asked, my voice coming out harsher than I’d intended. “What do you mean?”
“What I’m feeling is crippling,” she told me. “Completely physically debilitating. It is turning my entire world upside down, and I’m trying to find where I still fit in. I lost my job and my identity all in one fell swoop.”
“Don’t you think that I, of all people, understand what that’s like?” I asked. “When I injured my back, golf was gone. Something I had been doing my entire life. The only job I had ever known. And not just that, but I was physically limited from that point on. I was half the man that I had been all because of one bad swing. I think I can understand what it feels like to have an identity crisis.”
“Fuck, I know. I do know that you have been here before. And I’m sorry that I yelled at you, but it doesn’t really change how I feel. It doesn’t change the fact that what happened…I associate with you and your family. So, it makes this hard.” She gestured between us.
“Being with me?”
“Being near you,” she corrected. “Seeing you and knowing that I love you and that I can’t let this go. That I can’t forgive and forget. That, right now, I hate the Wrights and everything they fucking stand for. Because I lost myself, got caught up in you, and did exactly what I’d sworn I wouldn’t do. Now, I’m fucked.”
“I see,” I said, suddenly miserable again.
She loved me, but she didn’t want to even be near me. Miranda had hated my family for no reason, and now, Heidi hated them with good reason. I couldn’t fucking win.
“So, I just…I need time, Landon.”
Hello, time, my old friend.
“Of course,” I found myself saying. “It’s the last thing that I want to give you, but I will if you think it will help.”
She took a stutter step forward, as if she wanted to throw herself into my arms. Then, she seemed to catch herself and stopped. She shrugged out of my jacket and offered it back to me.
“Keep it.”
“I can’t.”
“Please, Heidi. Let me take care of you even if you don’t want to be taken care of.”
I bridged the distance that she had been hesitant to cross before and tugged the jacket closer around her. Her eyes were round with concern at my nearness. But she didn’t pull away.
“You might hate me right now, but I’ll be right here. If you need me, if you think you can move past what happened. I’ll be here, trying to fix what I broke between us.” I leaned forward and pressed my lips to her forehead. “I should have waited for you. I should have probably waited until Jensen or Morgan moved me. There are a ton of things I could have done, but I can’t regret our time together. I never will. You stole my heart completely with that first kiss in the back of Flips, and I don’t even want it back.”
A tear slipped down her cheek, and I gently swiped it off her face.
“No more tears, love.”
“I’m sorry, Landon,” she said in a choked gasp.
Then, she turned away from me and fled through the cemetery, leaving me with nothing but the dead to console my broken heart.
Thirty-Seven
Heidi
“I cannot believe that I let you talk me into this,” I said with a heavy sigh as Julia parked her SUV in the parking lot of the Overton.
“It’ll be fine,” Emery insisted from the passenger seat.
I was seated in the back in the dusty-rose slip dress that Julia had gotten for me. I had no idea why in the hell I was wearing it or why I was about to attend the Wright Charity Benefit.
“I have it on good authority that Landon isn’t even going to be here, and you know most of the company doesn’t even show up. It’s mostly for hoity-toity types with a lot of money to dish out,” Julia reminded me again. “Engineering would never show up for this.”
Well, that was true at least. No one in the department I had worked for had any interest in dressing up and going to some high-class function. But I didn’t understand why Landon wouldn’t be here. It was a Wright event. He was a Wright.
“And why isn’t Landon coming again?” I asked.
Julia and Emery passed a look between them.
“Jensen said he was busy,” Emery said at the same time Julia said, “I think he’s busy.”
They both laughed nervously, and I sat straight up. “He’s going to be here, isn’t he?”
“No!” they both said at once.
“Oh, Jesus, y’all lied to me?” I groaned. “Take me home! I am not dealing with this tonight.”
“How else were we going to get you here?” Emery asked, swiveling to face me. “So…Landon might be here. I don’t actually know. But we can still have a good time either way. I really didn’t want to go without you. Think about how much fun we had at Sutton’s wedding because you dragged me there.”
“You’re both shitty friends.”
“Free champagne. Free dinner. And a reason to wear a fancy dress. Fuck all the Wrights tonight, and let’s just have a good time. What do you think, Heidi?” Julia asked with a smile. Her red hair was flipped to one side, revealing the shaved undercut.
“Okay, but steer me clear of them tonight, or I can’t promise that I won’t flip my shit.” I popped the door open and stepped out with my nude strappy heels.
“Excellent,” Emery said. She hopped out next to me in her floor-length black dress and flats.
Julia had gone with mile-high black heels. She was rocking it with a short black one-shoulder dress that showed off her tattoos. I wouldn’t fuck with her.
“Shall we?” Julia asked with a wicked grin.
I nodded reluctantly and was ushered inside between my two best friends. I knew that they were only trying to be good friends, but I was not looking forward to this.
Wright Construction had fired me, and I had broken up with a member of the Wright family. Now, I was showing up at one of their events. It was pretty ballsy.
The ballroom was decorated to match the casino theme with enormous signs that said, Wright Charity Benefit Casino Night: Double Down for Charity. Roulette tables were set up in the center of the room. Blackjack and poker tables were already crowded with players. The noisiest area of the room was already the craps table. Women blew on the dice before men threw and hoped to win. It was outrageous and genius. All the money spent would be donated to the local Lubbock Children’s Hospital. From the looks of it, it would be a very generous donation indeed.
We angled toward the least crowded bar, and Emery passed out pink champagne.
She held her glass aloft. “To free champagne, best friends, and a girls’ night out.”
“Let’s get fucked up,” Julia added.
I just laughed. “I might have to get fucked up to live through this night.”