Thirty-Two
Heidi
We kissed passionately under the water and then cleaned ourselves up. Once out of the shower, we changed and found a local seafood place that had fish overnighted from the coast each day. It was incredible, and Landon assured me it was way more relaxing than a big PGA dinner could ever be.
I wanted to go to one eventually, but it wasn’t worth it to go to this one. Not when Miranda could show up and ruin everything. I didn’t want Landon to have to deal with that, and I couldn’t handle the headache.
It was enough for me this time that he really wanted me at the tournament to show me the life he led outside of Lubbock. And what a life it was.
We spent the next day wandering the golf course and meeting his friends. Ryan fell pretty quickly out of the top of the tournament rankings, but Landon told me he would still be assured a substantial prize for getting this far.
And the rest of the weekend was just…amazing. Hanging out with Ryan, enjoying the game, and finding my place in both of Landon’s realities.
After the winner was announced, we had to hurry and catch our flight home. I was sad to go. This had been a pretty wonderful weekend. Just the two of us actually having the opportunity to live our lives. It was refreshing. And it’d made me all the more nervous to get home.
Because we couldn’t have that life at home.
When we returned, he would be my boss again, and I would be a lead engineer in the company I’d been working for since college…the company his family owned. Everything was stacked against us back in reality. And I didn’t want to have to deal with it. Not after the weekend we’d had.
“You’re awfully quiet,” he said as we boarded the plane home.
“The weekend was so perfect.”
“So, you’re sad about that?”
“Only that…we’re not together at home. That’s not our reality. And I got used to you being my boyfriend here.”
“Heidi,” he said with a sigh. “We’ll figure it out.”
“When?” I asked.
“I might have…already talked to Jensen.”
“You did what?” I screeched. A few people turned to look at us, and I dipped my head to my chest. “I mean…what were you thinking?”
“I didn’t tell him it was you. Only that I was dating someone on my floor, and I wanted him to find me a new spot.”
My breathing got shallow. “He’s going to figure it out.”
“No, he’s not. There are a lot of girls on the floor. They’re just not in engineering. And, anyway, he said to wait it out, and he would figure a way to make it work.”
“When did you talk to him? Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked frantically.
“Um…at church, a week ago. I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want to get your hopes up. I don’t know how long it could take. He doesn’t know it’s you. He thinks that my new girl is someone I just met and that I’ll get over it.”
“How charming.”
“Jensen is just looking out for me.”
“I know, I know. He’s a great guy. He’d have to be to be with my best friend. Still, I wish you had told me.”
“I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to keep it a secret or anything. I wanted to wait to figure out what Jensen could do.” Landon took my hand as we settled into our first-class seats. “Trust me, okay? We’ll make this work out.”
I nodded. He was right. If Jensen didn’t know, then it could theoretically be anyone. There were a ton of other women that Landon could be with, and if Emery kept her mouth shut, then Jensen would never have a reason to suspect me. In fact, he’d probably think that I was the last person Landon would pick, considering his history with Emery.
Landon planted a kiss on my cheek, and the rest of the flight was smooth sailing. My bad mood about having to hide our relationship again vanished. Maybe I was overreacting anyway.
Did I want our relationship to be known to everyone? Of course.
Could I wait until Jensen moved Landon to a new spot? Probably.
I didn’t want to wait, but it wasn’t the end of the world. Landon was worth waiting for as far as I was concerned.
Our descent into Lubbock was a little rocky. They’d had some storms unexpectedly blow through, and it was keeping a lot of flights in Dallas. Luckily, we’d gotten out just in time. But my stomach was queasy by the time we made it to Landon’s car. I sipped on a bottle of water as we drove through the flooded streets back to my apartment.
That was such an issue in Lubbock. Because it rained so infrequently, anytime there was rain, all the streets would overflow. The ground couldn’t soak it up. There weren’t enough drains. And, basically, the rain always hit like a flash flood. I swore, it was bad planning from some poor government civil engineer. A better sewer system would have handled that, but I didn’t work for the government. So, it probably wouldn’t get fixed anytime soon.
Landon lugged my suitcase inside while I checked the mail. I tucked the mail under my arm as I dashed inside to try to get out of the rain.
“Oh my God, it’s like a monsoon out there,” I said, throwing the mail onto the counter and shaking out my soaking wet hair.
“Yeah. No joke. You would never guess that we were normally a desert climate.”
I laughed. “No way. I’m going to change out of these wet clothes.”
“Can I watch?” he asked with a grin.
“Why do I have a feeling that’s not all you’re going to do?”
“No idea.” He tried and failed to give me a look of innocence.
“I’ll just be a minute.”
I traipsed into my bedroom and stripped out of my travel gear. I changed into pajama bottoms and a T-shirt before towel-drying my hair. I looked like a wet dog but whatever.
When I walked back out to the living room, Landon was sitting on the couch, holding a plain white letter in his hand. He was gently tapping it against the coffee table. His eyes found mine across the room.
“What are you doing with that?” I asked, my voice small.
“Just saw it in the pile of mail. You still haven’t read any of them, have you?”
“No. Because I’m not going to ever read them. I don’t want to talk to him.”
Landon stood to face me. The letter between us felt like a barrier. “You shouldn’t compartmentalize this the way that you do, Heidi. I know that you miss him. I know that you only allow yourself one day a year to think about him. But it’s here every single week as a reminder. Aren’t you the least bit curious?”
“No,” I said fervently. “I’m not curious. I don’t want to hear from the man who did everything he could to ruin my life.”
“You and I both know that’s not true.”
“Yes, it is!” I cried.
“You didn’t think that way about him in high school, and he was using then. He might have fucked up. He might have done horrible things. But he loves you. He put you through cheerleading. He came to all of the football games. He threw you that graduation party.”