“No, I’d hoped to never have to hear that,” I said. “But I also didn’t expect for you to tell Janice that you didn’t want to have kids after we’d spent the last year doing everything possible to make that happen, then blow up on me when I asked you about it.”
Tears welled in her eyes, and within seconds, she was sniveling into her hands. Her shoulders were shaking. Her body was racked with sobs. The composed woman that I knew disappeared.
“I’m sorry,” she blubbered. “I’m so sorry. It was a joke between girls. I swear.”
“Well, it wasn’t a funny joke considering we lost a child and I’ve catered to your every whim the last year in an attempt to make it right. Then you tell her that you don’t want a kid to end up like a Wright so you’re not having one. Excuse me if I don’t think that’s funny.”
“It was stress,” she went on. “I know I shouldn’t have said it. I didn’t mean it. Everything I said was me being worried about your career and came out all wrong. It wasn’t anything else. I want you to get better. I want you to do what you love again. You know that you’re my first priority. Always. And I flew all this way to make it right.”
Her eyes came up to meet mine. They were bloodshot, and tears streamed down her face.
“Landon, let me make this right,” she gasped out.
My phone buzzed in my pocket, and I knew exactly who that was. I knew where I was supposed to be and what I was supposed to be doing. But here was my wife, my callous and hardened wife, laying it all out for me. I was so tired of all the shit that we had been through. I didn’t know if I believed her when she had she had been joking or that my career was her first priority, but I’d have to be a different man, a worse man, to not hear her out.
“One more chance, Miranda,” I told her. “Just one and if I ever feel this way again. I’m gone. Do you understand?”
She nodded fiercely. “You never will. I promise.”
Six
Heidi
Going to Café J to have brunch with Landon was an idiotic idea. I knew that down to my bones, yet I couldn’t say no to him. I’d tried, but when he had pleaded with me, I had been a goner.
There was never going to be a real relationship between us. I wouldn’t come between him and Miranda. I wouldn’t be that kind of girl.
But, still, I hoped.
I hoped for the day when he would tell me that he wasn’t just separated, but that he’d finalized a divorce with Miranda.
It was a bad, cruel thing to hope for.
Asking for a marriage to be ruined was bad Karma, and I needed all the good vibes I could get in my life. I’d had enough hard times, and I knew better.
Still…it made my chest ache to think about that one kiss. And, even though he’d been drunk the night before, my blood had heated when he asked me if I liked to be on top. It had taken all the willpower in my body not to give in and forget about being a responsible adult for once.
Yet here I was, driving out to see him.
As if I honestly believed we could go back to being friends after that kiss.
He’d cut off all contact with me because our conversations had gone from him finally having someone he could talk to in his life to deep, emotional conversations. To talking late into the night. To wanting to wake up and call him. To wanting to talk to him every day just to tell him about my day. To wanting to fly out there and see his smile to match the laugh I could draw out of him.
And then New Year’s. When our conversations had gone from everything but admitted feelings to almost crossing a line we would never have been able to come back from.
He’d ended it for a reason.
We probably should have been smarter and stuck to that.
Too late now.
He’d had his tongue down my throat, and I certainly wasn’t about to forget it. Even though the sane side of my brain told me I should want to forget.
I pulled into the Café J and killed the engine. It was busy, and the parking lot was full. I hurried inside, and after looking around and seeing Landon wasn’t there, I put my name down for a table for two.
“Should be about fifteen minutes,” the hostess said.
“Thanks.”
I took a seat on the bench to wait for Landon and pulled out my phone. I had two missed calls from him but no voice mail or text messages. Odd.
I dialed Landon’s number and waited. He wasn’t like me. He didn’t avoid phone calls like the plague. He almost always answered immediately. But, this time, his voice mail actually picked up.
“Hey. This is Landon Wright, and you’ve reached my voice mail. I’m not here right now, but if you leave a message, I’ll get back to you.”
Beep.
I ended the call. If I hated voice mails, I wasn’t about to leave one for him. Still, it was strange.
“Martin,” the hostess called.
“That’s me!” I waved my hand and stood.
I let the woman escort me to our table in the back of the room and ordered a glass of water for each of us. I assured the waiter that Landon was on his way and would be here any minute.
After about ten minutes of radio silence, I craned my neck back up to the front to see if maybe he was waiting and didn’t realize that I’d gotten a table already. But he wasn’t up there, and my phone hadn’t rung.
Landon was late.
Seriously, this was annoying. Why insist on seeing me if he was going to show up late? He was probably just working off that hangover or something, but it was crappy not to at least text.
I tried calling one more time, but he didn’t answer. Huh. I chewed on my lip. This wasn’t like Landon. Maybe something had happened. What if he’d been in a car accident or something? What if something had happened to him or Austin, and he couldn’t get to his phone? A slew of other worst-possible scenarios ran through my head.
With fear driving me, I sent Landon a text.
Hey, is everything okay? I’m worried about you. Call me back.
I bit my nail down to the quick as I waited for what felt like an endless amount of time. I shooed away the waiter more than once as he came by to check on me. Ten minutes turned into twenty, and twenty was quickly approaching thirty. I hadn’t eaten anything, and I had gone from worried to pissed.
Landon Wright had made me come here, only to abandon me.
He’d stood me up.
My heart beat rapidly in my chest, and I could hear whooshing in my ears, as if I were going through a tunnel. A flush of embarrassment coated my cheeks, and anger suffused my system.
I didn’t know what was going on in his life. I didn’t know what was really happening with Miranda. But this wasn’t acceptable.
I clenched my hands into fists and stood from the table.
Landon had made an idiot out of me.
I knew I’d been right the first time. I’d left Austin’s house last night, visibly upset about what I’d come to realize. Landon and Miranda had shit to work out, and I’d happened to be the closest person for him to channel his anger into. That was all it had been.
When he’d called this morning, I’d thought that maybe I’d read the situation wrong. Maybe I shouldn’t have left last night. Maybe we could see where things could go between us. Maybe he did want me.