“You could suggest to her that she simply take a walk around the garden,” Brant said. “Perhaps he would be appeased.”
“I don’t want her around him. Better I face his wrath than Allete.” The idea of him anywhere near my princess produced a kind of rage in me that I had never known was possible. I was not about to suggest she spend any time with him, no matter how brief.
As if on cue, Cathal rounded the corner.
“Speak of the devil, and he shall appear,” Brant muttered under his breath.
I didn’t bother to acknowledge the king. I simply stared straight ahead like a silent sentry. There was no point in me wasting my breath. Cathal would do enough talking for the both of us.
“I have left her alone for two days. I am not leaving here without seeing my bride.” His voice was surprisingly calm, but his clenched fists and stiff shoulders spoke volumes about what he was feeling on the inside. Cathal was livid.
“I will check with the princess,” I told him and knocked gently on the door. Her voice called out for me to enter, and I pushed the door open, slid inside, and closed it behind me in a nearly seamless motion.
“How are you today, princess?” I asked as I looked her over, trying to determine how she was feeling simply by observing her body language. She seemed resigned, and it troubled me.
“I am fine, Torben. Thank you for being so diligent in your job. I know you must be tired.”
My lips lifted only a fraction. “I’ve gone longer without rest and spent time in far worse conditions than a palace corridor.”
Allete sighed and turned to fully face me. She wore a simple blue dress that was alluring and concealing at the same time. She was beautiful, even as worried and tired as she looked. She was the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen.
“I suppose Cathal is waiting on me? Is that why you’ve come in?” Her voice held a weariness to it that made me want to fix anything and everything in the world just to see her smile for a moment.
“I came to see you because the corridor is dull and cold. You, lovely Allete, are the opposite. You are bright and shining, with a warmth that fills any room. You are my sun.” I do not know at what point in my life of raiding and plundering that I suddenly became a master of words, but there it was. If Brant had heard me, he would have laughed until his huge body laid sprawled on the floor, belly up, twitching like a spider that was taking its last breath.
Her eyes were wide, and her mouth had dropped open. Her chest was rising and lowering a bit faster and she was wiping her palms on her dress. I’d made her uncomfortable. I’d shaken the ground beneath her feet, and she didn’t know quite how to handle it.
“But, yes you are correct, the other reason I came was because Cathal is demanding to see his bride.” I felt my own heartbeat increase, loathing the idea that Cathal believed Allete to be his.
“I’ve allowed myself two days,” she began, choosing not to acknowledge my poetic words. “I will not get away with another.” She took a deep breath and then several steps toward the door. She stopped and looked at me. “You will be with me?”
“I will. Whether the heavens collapse and the mountains descend into the depths. Whether the gods curse all humans and wipe us out. Whether the great abyss and Hades himself takes over the world of the living. For as long as you want me, I won’t leave you.” She couldn’t possibly know all the ways I meant those words. She couldn’t know that I’d just chosen her as my mate, the woman I would build a life with. She couldn’t know that the words I’d spoken were the very same words used in the ceremony of joining a man and woman in my clan.
“There are times in our lives that painful things happen. During these times, we realize that nothing could have prepared ourselves for such pain. Our hearts are not prepared for it, our minds cannot grasp it, and our souls are left broken from it. I have felt such pain, but I realize that brokenness is not the end. I realize that I can let the pain destroy me, or I can rise from the rubble that has become my heart and be all the stronger for it.”
* * *
~Diary of Allete Auvray
I had only been expecting a simple ‘yes’. The question was certainly simple enough. I just needed to know that I would not be facing Cathal alone. But deep down I knew that the question wasn’t that simple. I needed to know that Torben would be the one to keep me safe. But he had said so much more than yes. The words were beautiful, but something in my gut told me that they were more significant than I realized. The words were far more than a simple statement. They felt like a covenant. Whatever the words had meant to him, for me they were a lighthouse. They were a beacon of hope. Maybe he realized I needed something hopeful to stand on because I felt so uncertain about my future.
I took a deep breath and then nodded at Torben to open the door. I kept my eyes on the ground, unable to look at the man who had stripped me of my dignity. But of course, he wasn’t about to let me protect myself.
I felt his fingers under my chin, and I had to swallow back the bile that was threatening to make an appearance. As he put pressure on my chin to raise my face, I bit the inside of my lip in order to keep myself from crying. I would not shed anymore tears because of the monster before me. He was not worthy of my tears. But when my eyes finally met his, my resolve nearly crumbled. If it was even possible, Cathal looked more eager and lustful as his eyes roved over my body.
I felt like I needed to scrub myself with lye soap after his eyes perused me. He was no doubt removing every piece of clothing as he stared. The anger invoked by that thought kept the tears at bay. I was simply a brood mare to him. He did not want me for any other reason than to look pretty and bear his children. I would not cry, no matter how it hurt my soul.
“How are you feeling, my love?” Cathal asked. His voice was sickeningly silky. He leaned closer and took a deep breath. “You smell divine. You must no longer be sick.”
“I am better. Though I’m still tired.”
“I have missed you.” His hand dropped from my face and grabbed my hand. He wrapped it in the crease of his elbow and began to lead me away from my chamber. “Instead of spending time with my lovely, tasty bride, I have had to endure boring talks with your father concerning your dowry and the protection of his kingdom.”
“I apologize, my lord. I’m sure that must have been quite unpleasant.” No matter how unpleasant he thought his time with my father had been, I knew it would be nothing compared to the time I was about to spend with him. My skin was crawling, and my stomach was threatening to climb out of my throat. His touch alone was enough to make me want to dunk myself in a vat of scalding hot water.
“I would like to take you on a ride today,” he said. “And I wish you to ride with me.”