“No one can touch me—haven’t you figured that out yet, Shelby? God, it was so pathetic watching you scramble around for all these years, doing whatever Mommy Dearest asked. I mean, obviously it benefited me since I finally got to fuck you after all those years I spent wanting you, but still. Pathetic.”
He laughs again when Shelby darts out from around me. The only thing stopping me from punching him in the face is wrapping my arms around Shelby and holding her back from doing the same.
“He’s not worth it, Shelby,” I say quietly in her ear as she squirms and tries to fight my hold on her.
“I have to give that woman credit, though,” Landry muses, shoving his hands in his front pockets. “As weak as she was, she sure turned into quite the firecracker. I wanted to kill you and get you out of the picture permanently, but she convinced me sending you on deployment was a better idea. And it worked, too, until your deployment was almost up and I knew you’d come running back home to her. A few phone calls to the right people and voilà! Your unit heads off into the most dangerous, IED-infested area there is. Boom. No more Eli. You couldn’t just stay dead, could you?”
It’s Shelby’s turn to clutch at my arms and try to hold me in place, but it’s no use. As soon as he says those words, as soon as he mentions the explosion that killed my brothers, I’m charging across the room.
Somewhere in the back of my mind I can hear Shelby shouting my name, but all I can hear are the sounds of explosions and screams, all I can see is red, and all I can feel is rage. My hand wraps around his neck and I slam him into the wall at his back, getting right in his face.
“You killed my men,” I growl. “Did you have me taken hostage, too? Was my five years in hell the result of another phone call to the right people, you sick son of a bitch?”
I tighten my fingers around his neck and he reaches up to claw at my hand, choking out his words with a cocky smile on his face.
“That was just luck. But I did make sure to send them a nice hefty bonus to finish the job I started.”
Yanking him toward me, I shove as hard as I can and slam his back into the wall once more. I feel Shelby’s hands clutching to the back of my shirt, trying to pull me away, but I ignore her as I squeeze and squeeze and squeeze. The memories slowly start to flash through my mind—the scorching heat from the blast, the shrapnel and pieces of my brothers raining down on me, the ringing in my ears, the punches to the face, being dragged across the sand, blindfolded, kicked…the sounds, the smells, the pain, it surrounds me until it’s all I can do not to kill this man for being the one responsible for everything.
“Eli! He’s not worth it, Eli. Please, he’s not worth it.”
Shelby’s voice finally penetrates, repeating the words I’d said to her just a few seconds ago, and I slowly start to loosen my hold around Landry’s neck, his red face and bulging eyes still holding an air of satisfaction and arrogance even as he coughs and sputters and tries to drag in breaths.
“I’m not worth it?” he croaks, his hands rubbing the skin of his throat when I finally let go. “What about him? You’re actually going to choose him over me? A man who couldn’t even keep his best friend alive?”
Blood rushes through my ears and pain explodes behind my eyes. Images try to push their way to the front of my mind but I won’t let them. Not here. Not now. I’m not ready for this.
“He couldn’t even save his brother and you think he’s going to save you?” Landry shouts at Shelby, his eyes narrowing as he leans toward me. “Tell me, did Sergeant Edwards beg for you to help him right before they put a bullet in his brain?”
I stumble backward, shaking my head frantically back and forth. It sounds like Shelby is screaming from somewhere down a tunnel. I want to go to her, I need her to make this all better, but I can’t get to her. I can’t move. I can’t stop his words from penetrating and I can’t stop everything from hitting me all at once.
Rylan joking with Kat, but her never acknowledging him.
Kat asking me if I’d taken my meds anytime I spoke to him.
Rylan asking Paul a question and Paul not even looking in his direction.
Kat looking like she wanted to cry when I told her Rylan was moving in with me.
Rylan aiming the remote at the TV but never getting it to turn on.
Rylan with the same shaggy hair and beard.
Rylan never changing, never finding anything to do, never moving on.
“You need to tell Shelby what happened over there and let go. Just…let go.”
“I’ll leave when you don’t need me anymore.”
I squeeze my head in my hands and close my eyes, trying to make it go away. Go away, go away, go away. I’m not ready.
Shouting, the pounding of footsteps and gunfire sound from outside the room and I wonder just how many people they need to bring in here to kill two weak men who can barely move.
My hands are quickly shackled to a wall above my head right next to Rylan, my broken body groaning in protest. No matter what happens next, I will not give in. I was born a Marine and I will die a Marine.
“Ooh Rah,” we both whisper to each other, not breaking eye contact as a loud explosion shakes the walls, rattles our chests, and rains dirt and rocks down on us from the ceiling.
How much can a man take before he breaks?
I see one of our captors rush over to stand in front of Rylan, lifting his arm and aiming the gun right at his head.
I hear myself screaming, screaming, screaming, tugging as hard as I can on the chains, kicking my legs, doing whatever I can to make this asshole point his gun at me instead.
Rylan’s eyes never leave mine. He tells me it’s okay. He makes a joke that we all have to die sometime. He tells me never to stop fighting. He tells me to get my girl back and live a good life for both of us.
He stops telling me anything else when the gun explodes.
I can’t breathe. I try to scream, I try to fight, I try to kick and claw away from the nightmare that I don’t want to believe is real. I drop to the floor and curl into a ball, trying to make it all go away. It’s not real, it can’t be real.
I didn’t save him.
I couldn’t save him.
I can’t do this. I can’t handle this. I just want it all to go away.
Closing my eyes even tighter, I do what I can to make it all go away, but it’s no use.
I finally know how much a man can take before he breaks.
Chapter 29
Shelby
It’s been a week since the day in the studio when everything came crashing down. Seven days of crying, of worrying, of pacing the halls of the hospital, sleeping in a chair next to Eli’s bed and begging him to come back to me.