The Secrets of Lake Road

“It’s not.” Megan looked back at the old jukebox. The outside world had moved on in terms of technology, but the lake and its community refused to succumb to any pressure to change. It was the sense of familiarity, of sameness, that Caroline found comforting year after year. She wished she could say the same about her friend.

They were both silent. The air between them felt awkward and strange. She didn’t want to think about the things Megan talked about, about kissing boys, but her mind jumped to Chris anyway. Her ankle tingled where his hand had touched her, the skin still warm. She bent down and swiped the feeling away, pretending she had an itch. She cleared her throat. She wanted to say something to make the queerness in her stomach and the weirdness between her and Megan go away.

“Come on,” she said, and tugged Megan’s arm, thinking if she could get her to jump into the lake, the water would take care of everything else. For one, it would wash the paint off Megan’s face and she would look more like the Megan from summers past. Two, it would rinse away the heat from Chris’s hand on her skin—and whatever feeling that came with it, the one that squirmed in her stomach, would drown.

*

Caroline continued to pull Megan through the Pavilion and out onto the beach. No one stopped them to check for swim passes. No one cared. Caroline tossed her baseball cap, kicked off her sneakers, and stripped from her shirt and shorts to the one-piece bathing suit she wore underneath. The sand was hot to the touch. The girls hurried past the chain-link fence with the sign SWIM AT YOUR OWN RISK, and stepped onto the pier.

Caroline looked around for anyone she might recognize, and spotted Adam. His family was one of the regulars who rented a cabin on the lakefront. He was a few years younger, at ten years old. His body was thin and birdlike. His summer buzz cut made his ears appear too big for his head. On either side of Adam were the Needlemeyer twins, Ted and Ned. They were one year younger than she and Megan, and as they walked toward them, she could’ve sworn she heard Megan call the boys babies under her breath.

The twins ribbed Adam, bumping him in the shoulder. Adam shoved Ted back. “I’ll do it when I’m ready,” he said.

“Do what?” Caroline asked. Behind Adam was the high dive, and beside it the low dive and the one most used.

“We dared him to jump off the high dive and touch bottom, but he’s too scared. Chicken. Bwack, bwack, bwack.” Ted flapped his arms.

“Am not.” Adam shoved him again, which only coaxed Ted into flapping his arms faster.

“Let’s see you do it,” Megan said to Ted.

“What? You don’t think I can?” Ted folded his arms, puffing up his chest.

“I think you’re just as scared as Adam,” Megan said, and lay down on the pier, positioning her body under the sun’s rays.

“I’m not scared,” Adam said. His face paled, and he looked as though he might cry.

Caroline stepped in front of him to shield him from the others. She didn’t want Adam to cry, nor did she want them to see if he did.

“Go on,” Ned said to his brother. “Let’s see you do it. I dare you.”

Ted glared at his twin and then turned toward the ladder and started to climb. For as long as Caroline had known them, neither brother would ever back down from a dare. It was a brother thing, or maybe a twin thing, always trying to one up each other.

Caroline watched Ted ascend. She had to shield her eyes from the sun when he reached the very top. “This is stupid,” she said.

Ted walked to the end of the board. His brother called up to him, “Pencil jump.”

He dropped his head as though he were hoping no one would suggest how he had to do it, but of course his brother did. “Fine,” he said, and hesitated, head bowed, staring at the water below.

“Bwack, bwack, bwack.” Ned flapped his arms.

Ted wavered. Ned kept squawking, taunting him. Until he jumped.

Caroline pulled in a sharp breath. At the last second Ted spread his arms wide to prevent a deep plunge. He hit the water with a slap.

“Chicken!” Ned called when Ted surfaced. Then he turned to Adam and said, “Your turn.”

Caroline looked at Adam, whose face was no longer pale, but more ash gray. “Don’t try,” she said to him. “It doesn’t mean you’re a chicken. It means you’re smart.” She climbed the ladder to the low dive, but everyone knew you could never touch bottom jumping off the low dive. The lake was just too deep. Still she said, “Watch this, Adam,” and pencil jumped clean into the water. At first it was cool and refreshing, but the farther she sank, the temperature dropped to near freezing. And although she kept her eyes closed, the darkness of what lay below deepened. She kicked her long legs wildly, her arms paddling at a frantic pace, and propelled to the surface, relieved when her head broke above water and her lungs breathed in air.