I’d said my piece, done what I said I would. I’d given her an easy out. Now it was time to take what was mine. “Good,” I said, tucking a strawberry strand of hair behind her ear. Honesty and vulnerability stared back at me, and God, she smelled incredible. “I like being the guy who makes you feel that way.”
Peyton’s mouth fell open, eyebrows furrowed, and I almost laughed. Yeah, I was giving myself whiplash, too. Time for a new plan. I was more of an action guy, anyway.
Dragging my fingertips across the soft cotton of her shirt, I found the hollow of her spine and tugged her against me, swallowing her small gasp of surprise. When I began lowering my mouth, she stuttered, “I… I’m confused.”
I touched my forehead against hers. “And I’m yours.” Her hands left my shoulders and skimmed hesitantly over my back. “I mean it, Sunshine. You deserve better, but if you still want me even after knowing what a disaster I am, then I’m all in. I’m too selfish to walk away.” I leaned back. “But don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
The smile began in her eyes. Blue-gray glowed with an inner light, then the smooth skin around them crinkled. When I grinned in return, letting her know I was for real, that this was for real, the full force of it broke through. It was like watching a sunrise.
Peyton’s grip around me tightened, her chest became flush with mine, and I chuckled when her cheeks turned light pink.
“Consider me warned,” she replied. Her smile was playful and sexy without trying to be, just like her, and I released an exhale of relief. Denying myself what I wanted sucked. No wonder I never did it.
I ducked my chin again, eager to taste the lips I’d been dreaming about for weeks…
“Ah!”
…and ended up grazing cheekbone.
Peyton flinched, not the reaction I was going for, and I loosened my hold on her hips.
“Uh, okay.” Frowning, I fought the impulse to laugh it off or make a joke. Instead, I said, “I’m sorry. Did I… read this wrong?”
This hadn’t happened before. Usually, I was the one turning girls away, not the other way around. She shook her head vigorously and the pink of her cheeks flushed a bright red.
“No! No, no, no.” Peyton squeezed her eyes shut and laughed at herself, a strained sound that turned itself into a snort. Groaning, she dropped her head to my shoulder. “This is all me.”
She mock-sobbed, a strange reaction I found cute as hell, and I raised an eyebrow. “I’m just gonna say straight out that I have absolutely no idea what’s happening here.” I dipped my fingers beneath her hair and kneaded the muscles that had turned to stone. “But hey, you’re calling the shots here, all right? We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. You hear me?”
“But I do want to,” she insisted, or rather, I thought she insisted. Peyton’s voice was muffled against my shoulder, so I nudged her chin up with my thumbs. She let out a sigh. “It’s just that… well, it’s the first time I’ve ever wanted to.”
Her eyes widened, imploring me to read between the lines, but the pink swipe of her tongue distracted me. Sue me, I’m a dude. But then, a few seconds longer than it should have, her words sank in, and I jerked back like I’d been electrocuted. “Oh.”
Not my smartest move.
Peyton winced and her head fell back against my chest, hiding her face, and if I could’ve kicked my own ass in that moment, I would have.
“Hey, listen.” Gently lifting her chin again, I bent my knees so I could look into her eyes. “I’m glad you haven’t done this before.” She scoffed at this, and my smile grew smug. “No, I’m serious. I’m damn proud to be your first. You think I don’t love knowing I beat out all the other dudes with their heads up their asses?”
“Ha, yeah, cause there was a real line forming, let me tell you.” Peyton rolled her eyes. She really had no clue how amazing she was.
“Maybe you didn’t notice,” I said, sliding my thumb over her lips. “But guys were watching. Trust me. How could anyone see this mouth and not go insane wanting a taste?”
Evidently, this was better. I was bound to say the right thing eventually.
Peyton’s lashes lowered as a soft smile curved beneath the rough pad of my thumb. Something heavy moved inside my chest.
“Well, it’s hard to be kissed when you’re in and out of hospitals for a year,” she said, latching onto my wrists. “Before that, there were guys in my homeschool co-op, and I was around a bunch at rodeo events, but there’s never been anyone I was really interested in.”
“Until me,” I clarified because I was an arrogant ass. Also because I wanted her to smile again. She didn’t disappoint.
A musical laugh sprang free, her happy smile trailing behind, and I was in heaven. “Until you,” she agreed. She squinted one eye and added, “Though you should know, I’m probably gonna be really, really bad at it.”
The expression on her face said she honestly believed it, and I couldn’t wait to prove her wrong. I leaned close to her ear and whispered across her skin, “That’s impossible.”
Peyton’s breath caught in a gasp, and I angled back to see her face.