“Jesus,” he said. “I thought that the guy cheated on you or was married or something. Not that.”
The surprising part about it was that Dr. Sanders had pursued Alice. She’d assumed he’d be thrilled when she disappeared from his life—making it easier to pretend it never happened. But when she didn’t show up at work the next day, he’d called and left a message for her. And he continued to call for the next three days while he was out of town. Alice became so anxious about it, she’d got a new number. Then it occurred to her that he’d have her home address in the company records.
“I packed up my apartment, moved in with Mom and Dad,” she said.
“That was then?”
It had been a dark time. Her mom had just been diagnosed with cancer—and Alice had told them she was moving home to be closer to her. Her parents had thought it was out of the blue.
“What happened to the job?” her dad had asked.
“I quit,” she’d said. “You were right. It wasn’t for me.”
Her parents had been skeptical but they assumed, as Paul obviously had, that it was over a boy. A heartbreak. Something that she would recover from, given time.
For months Alice replayed the evening—and all the months leading up to it—on a loop, wondering what she might have done differently. Wondering what her role had been. And worrying that she would run into him. She worried so much she made herself sick. She gained weight. Her periods stopped.
Later than she should have, she realized why.
And then … her mother died. The funny thing was, if not for that she might have terminated the pregnancy. But there was something about losing her mother that made her want to hold onto the life she had inside her. It was almost as if her mother’s death had assured Zoe’s life.
A few months later when her great-gran needed a carer, it felt like the perfect solution. She could get out of San Francisco. She wouldn’t have to worry about running into Dr. Sanders whenever she left the house. She could start over, with her baby.
Which is exactly what she did.
40
David had made lunch reservations. It had been forever since he’d done that. He used to do it all the time in the early days, when the prospect of getting through the entire workday without seeing each other was simply too difficult. The funny thing was, until recently Kate had still found it hard getting through the day without David. Every night when she arrived home she automatically quickened her pace, already anticipating the sight of him—at the grill in shorts or helping Scarlett with her homework at the dining room table. Unfortunately it had been weeks since she’d felt this sort of anticipation. So when he’d suggested lunch, she’d been cautiously optimistic. Perhaps things were turning around? Maybe he’d even reconsidered things on the baby front?
She was putting on her coat before heading out to meet him when her phone started ringing. Actually, not her phone. Alice’s.
“Alice Stanhope’s phone, this is Kate speaking.”
“Oh uh … hello. This is Rosalie Hunt, Zoe’s school principal. May I speak to Alice?”
Kate hesitated. Alice was probably just getting into her first movie. She didn’t like the idea of disturbing her if she didn’t have to.
“I’m sorry, she’s not available right now. Can I help you?”
There was a short silence. “Who am I speaking with?”
“Kate Littleton. I’m a … family friend.”
“Well … this is a little awkward. I really do need Alice down at the school right away. It’s quite urgent.”
“Is it Zoe?” Kate asked. Her heart had quickened a little. “The reason I have Alice’s phone is in case anything came up about Zoe.”
“Well unfortunately something has come up. Zoe has had an … incident at school today. And she appears to have left the school premises.”
“She ran away?”
“We just can’t locate her right now. But if we don’t find her soon, we’ll have to contact the police. Is Alice able to come down?”
“Unfortunately not.” Kate looked at her watch. “Not for a few hours, at least.”
“I see. Well, is there someone else who can help? Anyone who knows Zoe, who might know where to find her? I’m afraid we’re a little bit stumped.”
Kate imagined Zoe’s horror if the police were involved. “I can come down,” she heard herself say.
“Thank you,” she said, sounding relieved. “Come right to my office. I’ll see you soon.”
Kate had no idea where to find Zoe, but at least there’d be someone there waiting for her if she did turn up. The idea that no one would be there for the girl after her … incident, whatever it was, was just too much for Kate to bear.
Kate briefly considered telling Alice, but decided against it. She had at least two hours of chemo left and the last thing she needed was to be strapped to her chair worrying about her daughter that whole time. And who knew, maybe Kate could sort the whole thing out and she’d never have to know? She drove like a fiend to the school, parking illegally right out front.
Now she sat in the principal’s office.
“Thank you for coming down. I’m Rosalie Hunt.”
“What happened?” Kate asked.
“Zoe’s class had a debate this morning.”
“Zoe told me about it,” Kate said. “She was quite nervous.”
“Apparently so. She’s not typically one to take part in this sort of thing, so her teacher was thrilled that she volunteered for a big role. She appeared to be doing well with it, attending group meetings, and she turned in a stellar written portion. But once she got in front of the room, Zoe froze. Couldn’t find her words.” Rosalie exhaled, long and slow, through her nose. “It seems she had some sort of panic attack. And then, well, she … urinated on the floor.”
Kate’s hands found her cheeks. “No.”
“Obviously we’re very concerned. I don’t suppose you’d have any idea where she might have gone?”
“None. But … I’ll find her.”
“If you do I’d suggest taking Zoe home right after so she doesn’t have to run into any of the students. And then … probably a few days at home would be best.”
“Yes. Yes. Of course.”
“Students do recover from these kinds of things, but it won’t feel like it for Zoe. Make sure you—”
Kate didn’t hear the rest. She was already on her way out the door.
41
It didn’t take Kate long to realize she was completely out of her depth. She’d called Zoe using Alice’s phone, but she didn’t pick up. She’d searched the school grounds, visited Alice’s apartment, the nearby park, the mall. Now, she was stumped.