Roman awakened late in the afternoon, hair stiff with dried paint, mouth dry, head pounding, sick to his stomach. He checked his cell phone. No response from Grace.
Depression hung so heavy he felt the crushing weight of it. Just end it, a voice growled. Roman tried to pray, but the voices kept taunting him. Even the demons believe in Jesus, Bobby Ray. And you know where they are. You know where you belong.
His cell phone rang, and he grabbed it, not even checking the ID. “Grace? Where are you?”
“It’s Brian.”
Roman felt the hard kick. “Is she with you?”
“No. She’s staying with a friend.”
Emotions in turmoil, Roman wanted to make demands, but knew he had no right. “She’s safe. She’s okay.”
“Safe, yes. Okay? No more than you, by the sound of your voice.”
“You’re the kind of guy she’s looking for. Someone stable, all together.”
“She’s in love with you.”
Why did love have to mean loss? Roman’s eyes felt like they were filled with salted sand. He rubbed them. Don’t cry. A man doesn’t cry. The silence stretched.
Brian sighed. “I’d say you’re in new territory, my friend. I’m here, if you want to talk. Day or night.”
Brian sounded like Jasper. When had talking ever done any good? Roman didn’t trust himself to speak. He touched the button to end the call and tossed the phone on the coffee table.
GRACE CALLED THE GARCIAS. Thankfully, Ruben answered. He didn’t seem surprised to hear from her in the middle of the week, nor that she needed to speak with him and Selah as soon as possible. “You’ve made your decision.” He sounded relieved. “Come this evening after seven. It’s important the whole family be here.”
Shanice asked if Grace wanted her to come and lend support, but Shanice wouldn’t hold back if Selah resisted. The last thing Grace wanted was to hurt the family who’d helped her through the most difficult time in her life. But she wasn’t going to make her child the sacrifice.
Selah opened the door and embraced her. “I know how difficult this has been for you, chiquita. I knew you’d eventually do the right thing.” She released Grace and stepped back, her smile beaming. “Ruben and the children are in the living room.”
No one spoke when Grace came in. She felt outnumbered with Ruben, Javier, and Alicia all seated in the living room. The atmosphere felt heavy with tension. Only Selah looked happy, excited. “We’ve been looking forward to this for months.” Selah waved her toward the couch. “Please, sit.”
It might have been wise to bring Shanice as support. Insides quivering with nerves, Grace perched on the edge of a chair. She swallowed hard, trying to find the right words.
Selah clasped her hands in her lap, cheeks flushed, eyes bright. “We can have the papers—”
“Selah.” Ruben spoke firmly. “Permítele hablar.”
Grace didn’t know an easy way to tell Selah. “I’m keeping Samuel. I’m taking him with me tonight.” Selah looked confused and then shocked. Grace went on quickly before she could speak. “I can’t begin to tell you how much I appreciate all you’ve done—”
“You can’t take him!” Selah’s eyes darkened in anger, even as the color drained from her cheeks. “This is his home. He belongs here with me!”
“Grace is Samuel’s mother, Selah.” Ruben put his hand firmly over his wife’s. “You and I have talked about this many times.”
Selah yanked her hand free. “I’m as much his mother as she is.” She glared at Grace and looked ready to fight.
Alicia surged to her feet, startling everyone. “You’re more his mother than you are mine!” She burst into angry tears, stepped around the coffee table, and fled down the hall. Stunned, Grace winced at the slammed door.
Ruben, furious, jerked his head at Javier. “Get your sister. This is a family matter.” When they both came back, Ruben stood. “Siéntate!” A rapid-fire conversation in Spanish took place before Alicia obeyed.
Ruben took his seat, calmer now. “Tell your mother how you feel, Lici.” He spoke gently, but with insistence.
“She won’t listen. She never listens.” The tears came again, but all defiance was gone.
“What’s wrong with you?” Selah demanded, her anger shifting from Grace to her daughter.
“You care more about Sammy than you do about me or Javier.”
Selah waved a hand, dismissing the accusation. “That’s not true! I do your laundry. I fix dinner every night. I drop you off at soccer practice and pick you up. You’ve been spoiled.”
Alicia’s young face twisted with hurt. “When was the last time you came to one of my soccer games, Mamá? You used to come.”
“I don’t have time.”
“Papá makes time. He comes when he doesn’t have to work late. But you? You never have time anymore. Sammy is always your excuse. It’s too hot. He needs to play, and he can’t do that in a stroller. He needs a diaper change.” Her voice rose. “It’s always about what the baby needs.”
Angry and defensive, Selah looked between her children. “I’m always here for you! You’re both almost grown up already. You don’t need me anymore.”
“You used to sit and talk with me after school every day, Mamá.” Alicia leaned forward, hands fisted in her lap. “All you care about is Samuel, and he isn’t even yours!”
Selah looked as though she’d been slapped.
Ruben turned to his son. “What about you, Javier? Do you have something to tell your mother?” When Javier shrugged, Ruben told him to speak up.
“I’m graduating in June and—”
“Yes,” Selah interrupted, impatient. “And you’ll go off to college and have a life of your own.”
“I’m not going to college next year, Mamá. I’m enlisting in the Army.”
Selah stared at him, then shook her head. “No, you’re not. That’s not even funny. Tell him, Ruben!”
“He’s eighteen. He can speak for himself.” Ruben leaned back in his chair, his hands gripping the arms, the only sign of his tension.
Javier leaned forward. “The Army will pay my way through university, Mamá.”
“You’ll go to the junior college and work.” She turned away from Javier and faced Grace again. “We have other things to talk about tonight.”
“More important things than your own children!” Alicia started to rise again, but one look from Ruben had her sitting. She turned her face away.
Javier shrugged. “Maybe she’ll believe me when I get on the bus to boot camp.”
Alicia erupted again. Selah grew defensive.
Grace didn’t want to be in the middle of their family crisis. Maybe caring for Samuel had been Selah’s way of fighting off the inevitable loss of her own children. They all began talking in Spanish at once. Grace got up quietly and walked down the hall. Samuel awakened when she lifted him. “Mama . . .”
Her heart melted. Oh, Lord, thank You. He knows I’m his mother. He rested his head on her shoulder and fell back to sleep. She had reached the front door when Selah came into the foyer.
“You can’t take him.”
“Mi amor! Stop this!” Ruben grasped her arm. “Samuel is her son. We agreed to help—”
She wrenched her arm from Ruben’s grip and took a step toward Grace, arms outstretched. Grace spread her hand on Samuel’s back and backed away. Ruben caught Selah by the shoulders. “Go,” he ordered Grace as Selah became hysterical.
A wave of grief overwhelmed Grace. Maybe if she’d tried harder, or worked things out differently, this family wouldn’t be suffering now. “I’m sorry, Ruben. I’m so sorry.” She fled, Selah crying out behind her. Opening the car door, Grace fumbled with the straps to secure Samuel in his seat.
“Grace, espera.” Ruben came down the walk. Selah stood on the threshold, arms wrapped around herself, sobbing.
Closing the car door, Grace stood in front of it. “You’re not keeping him, Ruben. I’m sorry Selah is so upset.” She started to cry. “Samuel is my son, and I’m not giving him up. I told you both at the hospital, right after he was born.”
He held up his hands. “It’s all right, chiquita. I knew this day would come. I warned her. She knows a child belongs with his mother.”