“Tell me what?”
“That I went on the pill.”
Erik turned around and looked down at her.
She smiled at him. “I just started. You’re supposed to keep up a second method for the first month. But then…”
He kept staring at her. She stepped up, level with him, and touched his bottom lip. “I can’t wait,” she said. “Nothing between us.”
Erik closed his eyes. “Get up there,” he whispered.
Epiphany, Part Two
“Qu’est-ce qui se passe?” Daisy whispered later. Her naked body curled up against his side, head on his chest. “What are you thinking about?”
“Nothing.” His body was relaxed but his mind was tangled in knots. He turned the snarl over and over, unable to find an end to draw out.
“You keep looking out the window to your place. Is his car still there?” Her tone was teasing and Erik put the pillow over his face. She peeked under it. “You think they’re hooking up?”
“I don’t want to know.”
“But you can’t stop thinking about it.”
Erik took the pillow and bopped her lightly on the head. “Stop knowing me.”
She laughed. “I’m sort of fascinated with it myself. Am I a voyeur?”
“Go over and voyeur away. Feel free.”
“I kind of want to,” she said absently.
“It doesn’t bother you?”
“Two men having sex?”
“I mean, Lucky’s your best friend.”
Daisy pushed up on her elbow, her fingers in Erik’s chest hair. “She is. And in a manner of speaking, so is Will.”
“So what if Will is hooking up with James? Is it cheating?”
Her chin rose and fell. “In the strictest sense, I guess it is, yes.”
“Would you tell her?”
“I don’t know. Right now I have nothing to tell. And you don’t either.” Her hand caressed his face, her thumb moving along his eyebrows and trying to smooth the wrinkle of worry between them. “But I can tell it’s bothering you.”
“No, it’s not,” Erik said. And then, because he was bothered, and because ultimately he laid all his troubles at her feet, he sighed against her hand and said, “Yeah, it is.”
“It’s not like there’s never been speculation about Will being bisexual. David would put money on it.”
“But it’s old speculation. Since he’s been with Lucky, does anyone even say that anymore?”
“Not really, no. It’s a dated joke.”
“Well, it’s one thing to joke about it and another thing to see it happening.” He looked up at her. “And I don’t know why I care. I don’t know why it bothers me so much. Easy to say it’s because he’s cheating on Lucky. But that’s not it. Not entirely. I don’t know…”
She was quiet a moment, stroking his head. “He’s your friend,” she said.
“David’s my friend and I couldn’t care less who he sleeps with.”
“No, I mean Will is your closest friend. You don’t have a lot of close male friends, Erik. You cultivate those relationships carefully. Even cautiously.”
“Something, something. Psychology. Fathers?” he said, smiling.
“Paging Dr. Freud. Whatever the reason, it’s still true. You’ve grown this friendship with Will over the years. You’ve put time into it. You’re emotionally invested in it. You’re close with him. It’s not sexual but you’re tight. And along comes James and he’s able to dial into Will not only artistically but perhaps physically.”
“I can’t compete on that field.”
“Please, Will would go to bed with you in a heartbeat.”
“Stop,” he said, groaning. “I have enough bad visuals going on right now.”
“You’re not threatened by it,” she said, toying with his necklace. “I know you’re not.”
“No, just revolted.” He hated admitting it, but homosexuality still repelled him at some primal level. At the same time he was keenly aware of something which tasted a lot like…