The Lovely Reckless

“I got you out of the apartment, and it wasn’t easy,” Lex says. We’re at her house later that night. “My mom doesn’t like talking to strangers unless they’re donating money to one of her charities. And you’re lucky she doesn’t pay any attention to me, or she would know that I’m not taking chemistry. So what’s the big favor?” She holds up her hand. “Wait. Let me guess. Your dad is home, and you need me to cover while you race cars or meet up with your new boyfriend?”

I’m not lying to her anymore. She’s my best friend and I owe her the truth, whether she ends up helping me or not. “It’s so much worse.”

She finally looks at me, her blue eyes rimmed with smudged black eyeliner. “How much worse?”

“My dad and Tyson have been investigating a crew, and Marco is involved.”

We’re sitting across from each other on her king-size bed, the way we’ve done since we were sharing secrets about the boys we had crushes on in elementary school.

Lex crosses her legs. “Marco knows who is doing it, doesn’t he?”

My eyes sting and my throat burns. “It’s him, Lex. He’s stealing cars. Marco’s dad is in jail, and he owed some lowlife money. Marco has to work off his father’s debt, or his sister will end up in foster care.”

Lex blinks, like she’s still processing what I said. “Did you tell your dad about Marco’s father and the guy threatening Marco and his sister?”

“I can’t betray Marco’s trust, and Dad won’t believe me anyway. In his eyes, Marco is a thief. Dad will never be able to see him as a victim.”

“Don’t hate me for asking, but are you sure Marco is telling the truth? What if he made up the whole story?”

“He’s not lying, Lex. You have to trust me.”

Worry lines form between her eyebrows. “I think you have feelings for this guy, and it’s affecting your judgment.”

“I need to see him, and I can’t take the chance of doing it at the rec center.”

Lex jumps off the bed and circles the room. “You want me to let him come here? Are you crazy?”

Probably.

I’m crazy about Marco and desperate to help him. It’s impossible to explain, but I know he’s telling the truth. I feel it in every kiss. Every touch. It’s in Marco’s eyes when he looks at me and in his voice when he says my name.

Marco said there was no going back when it came to his feelings for me. There’s no going back for me, either.

“I’m not asking you to trust him or like him. I’m not even asking you to help him. I’m asking you to help me.”

Lex stares at me like I’m standing on that ledge and she’s afraid I’ll jump. “Are you’re falling for him?”

“He makes me feel safe. For the first time in months, I care about the future.”

Marco makes the future feel possible, a place worth imagining. As long as he’s in it.

Lex walks over to her desk and picks up a crystal-studded frame with a picture of the two of us at the eighth-grade dance.

I love that picture, almost as much as I love Lex. I can’t leave her or Abel behind, even if Lex’s blue eyes will always remind me of Noah’s, and so many of my memories of Abel and Lex include him. Even if I have to carry some part of the old Frankie with me so I can carry them, too.

Lex touches the spot where our faces smile from behind the glass. “Sometimes I wish we could go back. You and me and Abel—best friends—eating candy from the broken vending machine at the club and cannonballing into the pool until the old ladies complained. Things are so complicated now.”

I don’t think she’s talking about the two of us anymore. “Do you know what’s going on with Abel? I haven’t had a chance to call him.”

“No, but right now, we’re talking about you.” She sets the frame back on her desk. “I don’t want you to get hurt. You’ve lost so much.”

“That’s why I can’t lose Marco, too.” Saying the words—the thought of never feeling his arms around me again—threatens to break me. “Will you help me?”

“Haven’t I always been there when you needed me?”

I don’t hesitate. “Yes.”

“There’s your answer. You can talk to him in the pool house. My parents won’t go down there unless the house is on fire. Maybe not even then.” Lex forces a tiny smile that looks sadder than tears.

I jump off the bed and throw my arms around her. “Thank you.”

She squeezes me tighter. “Just don’t get hurt.”

I almost say I won’t, but the situation between Marco and me has hurt written all over it.

I’m okay with hurt.

It’s losing I can’t handle.





CHAPTER 28

DIFFERENT PERFECT

The pool house in Lex’s backyard is bigger than Marco’s entire apartment. Her mom spared no expense outfitting it with an L-shaped sofa and a flat-screen TV, a pool table and air hockey, and a stocked kitchen and full-size bathroom.

In middle school, Lex and I spent hours planning the parties we’d throw here and which boys we’d kiss when we played Spin the Bottle. We only ended up playing once, with Abel and his cousin who was visiting for the summer. After a six-pack of beer and a dozen do-overs, Lex’s spin landed on Abel, and she freaked out and puked in the bathroom before she kissed him.

Right now, I’m the one who feels like puking. I don’t know if Marco will go for my plan.