Tears filled my eyes, and I nodded. The gentlemen scattered, some leaning in a corner and others perching on benches. They bowed their heads or lifted them, all for my mother. They’d caused such an upheaval in my life . . . and I was so glad they did.
Hale kept his fist to his mouth, rocking on his feet nervously. Ean, as I expected, was very steady, arms crossed in concentration. Henri leaned forward on his bench, his curls flopping over his eyes; and I was happy to see that, even though he didn’t need to come, Erik stood beside him.
Kile found his mother, and they held each other. Kile was actually moved to tears for Mom, and, strangely, that tenderness made me feel stronger.
My eyes moved from him to the other remaining boys, and I thought again of how each of them had grown on me in his own way . . . and I looked over at Dad. His face was red from crying, his suit was all rumpled, and I could see the distress in every molecule of his body, horrified at the thought of his wife dying.
It wasn’t all that long ago that he’d stood where I did, that my mom’s face was one of many in his world. And yet, despite all the impediments and all the time that had passed, they were still deeply in love.
It was obvious in everything, from their shared room to the way they fretted over each other to the way they seemed to be incapable of not flirting with each other even after being married so long.
If anyone had told me I might consider that a possibility for myself a month ago, I’d have rolled my eyes and walked away. Now? Well, it didn’t seem so far-fetched. I didn’t expect to find what my parents had or even what Ahren had found with Camille. But . . . maybe I could find something. Maybe there would be one person who’d still want to kiss me when I had a runny nose or would rub my shoulders after a long day of meetings. Maybe I could find someone who didn’t seem so scary, who made letting him past the wall seem natural. But all that still could be asking for too much.
Either way, I couldn’t slow now. I knew that for my sake—for my family’s sake—I had to finish my Selection.
And, when I did, I’d have a ring on my finger.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
SPECIAL THANKS TO:
You, for being a generally cool person, but mostly for picking up a fourth book when you thought there’d only be three.
Callaway, for everything, but mostly for doing dishes and math, so I don’t have to.
Guyden and Zuzu, for being the cutest kids ever, but mostly for giving me snuggles when I’m having a rough day.
Mom, Dad, Jody, for all your encouragement, but mostly for being as weird as I am.
Mimi, Papa, Chris, for being so supportive, but mostly for watching the kids over Christmas break so I could sleep.
Elana, for being a really incredible agent, but mostly for making me feel certain that if anyone tried to pie me in the face, you’d tackle them for me.
Erica, for being a very talented editor, but mostly for letting me call you about eighteen times a week without complaining.
Olivia, Christina, Kara, Stephanie, Erin, Alison, Jon, and a gazillion other people at HarperTeen, for being generally awesome people, but mostly for making my life much easier even though we, like, never see one another.
God, for being God, but mostly for making a world where things like kittens wearing bowties are a reality.
And to anyone else I forgot—which is undoubtedly a lot of people—because I’m generally forgetful, but mostly because I’m so tired now, I’m typing this with my eyes closed.
Love you all!