Dad stood in shock. “Love, what happened?”
“Hell if I know.” I stormed off, humiliated. As if the whole thing wasn’t embarrassing enough, the sad eyes of everyone around me made it even worse.
Poor thing, their expressions seemed to say. And I hated their pity more than I hated the people who thought this was acceptable.
I scurried through the palace, head down, hoping no one would stop me. It wasn’t my lucky day, of course, because as I rounded onto the landing of the second floor, Josie was there.
“Ew! What happened to you?”
I didn’t answer, moving even faster. Why? What had I done to deserve this?
Neena was cleaning when I walked in. “Miss?”
“Help,” I whimpered before bursting into tears.
She came over and embraced me, getting my mess all over her pristine uniform. “Hush now. We’ll clean you up. You get undressed, and I’ll start the bath.”
“Why would they do this to me?”
“Who did it?”
“My people!” I answered in pain. “My subjects. Why would they do this?”
Neena swallowed, disappointed for my sake. “I don’t know.”
I wiped at my face and makeup, and something green came off on my hand. The tears fell again.
“Let me start that bath.”
She scurried away, and I stood there, helpless.
I knew the water would get rid of the mess, and I knew it would take away the smell, but no amount of scrubbing would ever wash away this memory.
Hours later I was scrunched up on a chair in Dad’s sitting room, bundled in my coziest sweater. Despite the heat, my clothes were my only armor at the moment, and the layers made me feel safe. Mom and Dad were both drinking something a little stronger than wine—a rare occasion—though it didn’t appear to be doing much for their nerves.
Ahren knocked but came in before anyone answered the door. Our eyes met, and I rushed across the room, throwing my arms around him.
“Sorry, Eady,” he said, kissing my hair.
“Thanks.”
“Glad you could come, Ahren.” Dad was looking at some of the stills from the parade that the photographers had provided him, stacking them on top of several of today’s papers.
“Of course.” He put his arm around my shoulder and walked me to my seat, going to stand with Dad while I curled back up into a ball.
“I still can’t believe this happened,” Mom said, reaching the bottom of her glass. I could see her weighing in her head whether or not to have another. She decided against it.
“Me either,” I mumbled, still suffering under the surge of hatred those people felt for me. “What did I do?”
“Nothing,” Mom assured me, coming to sit beside me. “They’re mad at the monarchy, not you. Today your face was the one they could see, and that’s the one they attacked. It could have been any of us.”
“I felt so certain a Selection would lift their mood. I thought they would delight in this.” Dad stared at the pictures, still shocked.
We sat silent for a while. He’d been so wrong.
“Well,” Ahren started. “They might have if it wasn’t Eadlyn.”
We all gaped at him.
“Excuse me?” I nearly started crying all over again, pained by his cruel words. “Mom just said it could have been you or her or anyone. So why are you blaming me?”
He pursed his lips, looking around the room. “Fine. We’ll talk about this. If Eadlyn was a typical girl, one who wasn’t raised to be in control all the time, this would probably look different. But pick up any of those papers,” he said, gesturing to the pile. Dad did. “In general she comes across as distant, and every picture from last night’s dinner is uncomfortable to look at. You’re nearly scowling in some of them.”
“If you were in my shoes, you’d know how hard this is.”
Ahren rolled his eyes at me. More than anyone, he knew I wasn’t intending to pick a mate in the next few months.
Mom left me and peeked over Dad’s shoulder. “He’s right. On your own, you look like an island, and with the Selected there’s no chemistry, no romance.”
“Listen, I’m not performing for anyone. I refuse to act all dopey over a bunch of boys to entertain people.” I crossed my arms, determined.
Two days in and this was already a disaster. I knew it wouldn’t work, and now I was stuck in this humiliating situation. Could they dare ask me to sink further into shame for the sake of something that clearly wasn’t going to help?
The room went silent, and, foolishly, I thought for a moment that I’d won.
“Eadlyn.” I looked at Dad, trying not to be moved by the pleading in his eyes. “You promised me three months. We’re trying hard to brainstorm on our end, but we can’t extinguish that fire if we’re dealing with new ones. I need you to try.”