I walked to the first basket, with a label declaring the contestants were all from Clermont. I pulled one from the side, cameras flashed, and the handful of people in the room actually applauded. Mom wrapped her arm around Ahren in excitement, and he sneakily made a face at me. Miss Marlee sighed with delight, but Miss Lucy was absent. Osten was missing, too, which was no surprise, but Kaden stood by, observing the whole thing with interest.
I used different techniques for different bins. On one, I plucked the envelope from the very top. On the next, I buried my arm to fish out my choice. The onlookers seemed incredibly amused when I got to Carolina, Mom’s home province, picked up two envelopes, and weighed them in my hands for a few seconds before dropping one back in.
I placed the last entry in Dad’s hands, and there was more clapping and camera flashes. I gave what I hoped was an enthusiastic smile before the reporters all exited the room, off to give their exclusive stories. Ahren and Kaden left, joking as they went, and Mom gave me a quick kiss on the head before she followed them. We were speaking again but didn’t have much to say.
“You did marvelously,” Dad said once we were alone, a genuine tone of awe in his voice. “Really, I understand how nerve-racking this can feel, but you were wonderful.”
“How do you know though?” I placed my hands on my hips. “If you didn’t pick out the entries yourself?”
He swallowed. “You’ve heard the broad strokes of how your mother and I found each other. But there are tiny details that are best left in the drawer. The only reason I am telling you this is because I think it will help you to see how fortunate you are.”
I nodded, not sure where he was going.
He took a breath. “My Selection wasn’t a farce, but it wasn’t that far off. My father chose all the contestants by hand, picking young women with political alliances, influential families, or enough charm to make the entire country worship the ground they walked on. He knew he had to make it varied enough to seem legit, so there were three Fives thrown into the mix but nothing below that. The Fives were meant to be little more than throwaways to keep anyone from being suspicious.”
I realized my mouth was gaping open and shut it immediately. “Mom?”
“Was meant to be gone almost immediately. Truth be told, she barely made it past my father’s attempts to sway my opinion or remove her himself. And look at her now.” His whole face changed. “Though it was hard for me to imagine, she is even more beloved as queen than my mother. She has made four beautiful, intelligent, strong children. And she has been the source of every happiness in my life.”
He flipped idly through the envelopes in his hands. “I’m not sure if fate or destiny is real. But I can tell you that sometimes the very thing you’ve been hoping for will walk through the door, determined to fend you off. And still, somehow, you will find that you are enough.”
Until then I’d never had a reason to doubt that I’d seen the whole picture of my parents’ love story. But between Dad’s confession that Mom wasn’t even supposed to be a choice and Mom’s revelation that she didn’t want to be a part of the choosing in the first place, I wondered how they had managed to find each other at all.
It was clear from Dad’s expression, he could barely believe it himself.
“You’re going to do great, you know?” he said, beaming proudly.
“What makes you think so?”
“You’re like your mother, and my mother, too. You’re determined. And, perhaps most important, you don’t like to fail. I know this will all work out, if only because you’ll refuse to allow it to go any other way.”
I nearly told him, nearly confessed I had come up with pages of ideas to drive these boys away. Because he was right: I didn’t want to fail. But for me, failure meant having my life led by someone else.
“I’m sure everything will turn out just as it should,” I said, a whisper of regret hanging in my voice.
He lifted a hand and placed it on my cheek. “It usually does.”
CHAPTER 7
IN THE STUDIO, THE SET was slightly rearranged. Typically, Ahren and I were the only ones who sat on camera with my parents, but tonight Kaden and Osten were given seats onstage as well.
Dad’s officials were in a cluster of seats on the opposite side, and in the middle a bowl waited with all the envelopes I’d picked earlier. Beside it was an empty bowl for me to place them in as they were opened. I had reservations about reading out the names myself, but at least it gave the appearance of control. I liked that.
Behind the cameras, seats were filled with other members of our household. General Leger was there, kissing Miss Lucy on her forehead and whispering something to her. It had been a few days since I’d overheard their conversation, and I still felt awful for her. Of all the people in the world who ought to be parents, it was the Legers. And of all the people in the world who ought to have the ability to fix things, it was the Schreaves.