‘Sorry. Again. I don’t know why I didn’t think to check or anything. Cherry just said she was famished and we went and grabbed something.’
She hadn’t been that hungry, remembered Cherry. She’d just said she was because she preferred eating alone with Daniel rather than having his mother tag along. It would’ve been more polite, more friendly to wait, but it was only one night, for God’s sake. It wasn’t like she hadn’t done the whole family and friends thing the night before. Laura could hardly expect them not to want to be alone at some point. In fact, she thought, with a touch of irritation, if she’d stop trying to be there the whole bloody time, she might not find herself alone at dinner.
Laura looked across to Cherry and smiled. ‘Right, well, I’d better go. The reservation’s at nine.’
‘We’ll come with you. Have a nightcap or something,’ said Daniel.
Cherry really didn’t want to. She was tired after a day of sun and half a bottle of wine, but she smiled as if she thought the plan was a good one.
Laura hesitated. ‘No, it’s all right. You’ve been out all day. I expect you just want to relax a bit. I’ll be perfectly fine on my own.’ She grabbed her jacket and bag, and kissed Daniel’s cheek. ‘See you both later.’
‘Sorry again, Laura. We’ll call next time,’ said Cherry.
Laura nodded and left the house.
As the door shut, Cherry pulled a face. ‘I feel bad.’
‘Yes, me too,’ said Daniel. ‘Maybe we should spend a bit of time with her tomorrow.’
‘I was thinking the same thing. Do you think your mum would enjoy a relaxing day by the pool? We could cook lunch, make up for it,’ said Cherry, and her burst of benevolence was rewarded with a hug.
Laura came home to a quiet house, a light left on for her. It wasn’t quite eleven. There was a note on the table: ‘Waited up for a while but fell asleep on the couch. Hope you had a great night. Fancy a day by the pool tomorrow? We’re doing lunch!’
Daniel had signed it from himself and Cherry. She listened out but could hear nothing and so went to bed alone.
THIRTEEN
Sunday 22 June
The next morning, Laura expected Daniel and Cherry to rise late again, but to her surprise they’d already got up and had breakfast by the time she followed the waft of fresh coffee into the kitchen. She could hear them laughing and chatting outside. She liked listening to their youthful exuberance and enthusiasm, their limitless energy for what they wanted to do with their lives, with no sense at all that the energy might run out or the beliefs might change. The mix of determination and idealism was exciting. She especially liked not knowing how it was all going to turn out, the joyful anticipation as you reached every milestone in a child’s life. Would it be a girl or a boy? What would they look like? What would their personality be like? How would they get on at school? Who would their friends be? What would they choose to study, choose to become? Having a child was the very best kind of lucky dip. She still thought of Rose like that every time Daniel reached a milestone, just briefly, a curious, painful wonder that would never be answered.
She poured herself a coffee and took a fresh croissant from the paper bag, and carrying the plate and the cup and saucer, made her way onto the terrace. She stopped almost immediately at the sight of Cherry brushing her hand across Daniel’s stomach as they both lay back on side-by-side loungers, eyes closed against the sun. Her hand went lower and her fingers tucked themselves into the top of Daniel’s shorts and, Lordy, she thought she saw a twitch. Torn between a polite but firm cough or silently turning and slipping back inside, the hesitation cost her her anonymity. Cherry had opened her eyes and for a moment her hand stayed where it was. She looked at Laura and then slowly removed it. She looked embarrassed. Laura decided it was kinder to ignore it.
‘Good morning,’ she said, walking across and taking her place by the pool.
‘Oh, hi, Mum,’ said Daniel, with a conspiratorial grin across at Cherry. ‘How was Vincent?’
‘Very well. Wanted to know everything you’d been up to. I tried to fill him in as best I could, but you’ve yet to tell me,’ she said lightly. ‘He wanted to meet you too, Cherry, and says there’s a table for you tonight, before you fly home tomorrow, if you fancy it. No pressure, but if you do decide to go over, he’ll find you some space.’
‘How nice,’ said Cherry.
Laura glanced up, but Cherry had closed her eyes.
Daniel pulled on Cherry’s hand. ‘Come on, time for a swim. Are you coming in, Mum?’
She didn’t much feel like it. She’d wait until after they got out. Do a few calm lengths. ‘Just going to have my breakfast first.’
They got into the pool.
‘Is it cold?’ called Laura, already knowing the answer by Cherry’s squeals. It was a little pathetic, she recognized, being unable to make conversation. But neither of them answered. They didn’t hear – they were so absorbed in each other, and Laura watched them for a while from behind her sunglasses as she bit into her croissant. There wasn’t much actual swimming going on, more ducking, splashing, arms wrapped around each other. She looked away, feeling excluded, and, she was ashamed to admit, rather jealous and lonely.
They climbed out about five minutes later and lay with arms hanging down, fingers surreptitiously meeting and touching.
Laura decided to go in. She swam for a bit and then floated, gazing up at the sky. She felt weightless, and with her ears underwater, the sound of her thoughts became filtered and pure. So far this trip, she’d felt distant, out of sync. When she was in the pool, her son and his girlfriend were out, with eyes closed. When she wanted to go for dinner, they’d already eaten and were heading for bed. When she suggested a day out in the countryside, they’d decided on the beach. It wasn’t quite how she’d envisaged Cherry’s visit. She smiled inwardly; she was a gooseberry.
Laura had hoped to get to know Cherry a bit and found herself wondering why she didn’t seem to want to talk much. She might have made a bit of effort, seeing as she was staying in the house. She stretched out in the water. Never mind, let them have their time together; Cherry was leaving the next day.
She climbed out and went back to her lounger. Cherry was talking in that low, private voice that was exclusive to lovers and Laura pulled out her book and started to read.
She awoke to find both of them gone. Groggy, she sat up and reached for her watch to check the time. It was noon. She suddenly saw Cherry in the doorway of the house, looking at her. Had she just arrived, or had she been watching a while? Laura pulled her wrap around her and sat up.
‘We’ve made lunch,’ said Cherry, and she went back inside.