“No way,” he murmured, reaching out as if he just expected me to hand it over.
With a scowl, I slapped it back to my chest. “I don’t think so, Scooter.” I’d learned the hard way to never show my lyrics to another living soul. After Fisher had stolen my lines and used them to make Fish ’N’ Dicks’s one and only hit song, I was never going down that road again.
But Asher blinked at me as if I was insane.
So I cleared my throat. “I just...they’re all awful. So there’s no point in wasting your time even looking at them.”
“Whatever, man. I’ll be the judge of that. Besides, ninety percent of mine suck ass too. Now...gimme.”
When I merely shook my head stubbornly, he sent me a sexy grin. “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.”
I snorted. “Honey, I just saw yours and let me say...holy fucking wow. You win.”
Asher’s mouth fell open before he shook his head and murmured. “I can’t believe you just admitted that to me.”
I shrugged. “What? That you’re bigger? You’re the one who had no qualms of flashing your junk at me. So I’m just saying that was one impressive cock. Seriously, you should be proud of that monster. I mean, the first moment you came out of the bathroom, swinging it around, I just wanted to...you know, suck on it.”
When I wrapped my hands around air as if gripping a ginormous invisible penis, I realized what I was doing and what I’d just said. “I mean...” Oh holy hell, that had to be going too far, even for a gay guy.
I gaped at Asher, bracing for him to kick my ass or throw me out of our hotel room, or something, but he only threw back his head and laughed. “Holy shit, you are so fucking funny. That has to be the gayest thing you’ve ever said to me.”
Gulping, I cringed backward. “Yeah, sorry.”
“Meh, don’t worry about it.” Still laughing, he wiped tears from his eyes. “But, wow, you are definitely one hundred percent gay, aren’t you? I mean, you really prefer guys.”
“Um...yeah,” I drew out the word as if that shouldn’t be so hard to believe.
He shook his head. “That’s just so strange. You don’t even like boobs? I mean...boobs, man.” He feigned squeezing a pair. “They’re just so...” He made a hungry sound in his throat. “Breastly.”
I shrugged. “Eh.”
Still with the head-shaking, he studied me as if I was some odd, unnatural specimen. “Okay, fine. What about pussies then? Seriously, no way can you have a dick and turn your nose up at one of them. They’re all wet and warm and tight. They were freaking made to hold a cock, and they feel like heaven when you slide into one. And the flavor. Have you ever even tasted a *?”
I wrinkled my nose. “Eww. No.”
He lifted his hands. “Well, there’s your problem. You have no idea what you’re missing.”
Narrowing my eyes, I said, “Are you trying to turn me hetero?”
“No.” Then he laughed as if laughing at himself. “Well, I didn’t think I was. I was just trying to figure out what you didn’t like about women. They’re freaking perfect, all soft and feminine and good-smelling.” He sucked in a breath and closed his eyes. “There’s nothing like sinking into one while you’re sucking a nipple into your mouth. And then warm, smooth legs go and wrap around your waist until she’s digging the heels of her feet into your ass. It’s just...nirvana.”
Heat traveled up my thighs until my * was so wet and aching I had to squeeze my legs together under my covers.
Asher opened his lashes and glanced at me from glossy, lust-covered green eyes, letting me know the vision he described affected him as much as it had affected me. I wondered how big his monster cock was now, and how it’d feel if he was on top of me, sliding it deep between my legs as he sucked on my nipples.
Dios.
I shuddered, noticing he was doing the same thing.
“Sorry, I just...love women,” he murmured before glancing away as if suddenly uncomfortable.
Which made me think of the stench of perfume that had clung to him when he’d entered the hotel room only half an hour ago.
My lust soured, then died completely.
“Yeah, I can tell,” I muttered. When he glanced at me with a confused frown, I said, “You smelled like a dozen whores when you came in. I’d have hopped into the shower first thing to wash off all that reek too if I’d been you.”
Chuckling, Asher didn’t take offense. He merely shook his head. “That actually came from only the one woman. The blonde. Monique.”
I snorted, wishing Monique an awful untimely death. “Well, Monique has quite a habit of rubbing her perfume off on other people.”
Asher rolled his eyes and muttered, “You’re telling me.”
My mouth fell open as I stared at him. Finally, I said, “Oh, I’m sorry, man. Did Monique not do it for you in the bedroom?” The skank’s * had probably been so well-used it hadn’t been nearly tight enough for him.
“Huh?” He glanced at me as if I was insane. Then he shook his head. “No. We didn’t have sex.”