The Friends We Keep

“She is.” Gabby sighed. “I don’t know what to say to her. I know I can’t make it better, but boy, do I want to try. I hate feeling so useless.”


Their waitress arrived with the milk shakes. Hayley let the cool, thick, sweet treat melt on her tongue. She felt the beginnings of a sugar rush as her world righted itself.

“There’s no bad in this,” she whispered.

“You know it, sister.” Gabby grinned.

Nicole laughed.

“It’s kind of funny,” Hayley said. “You and Makayla seem so much closer than you used to be. I never would have guessed things would work out that way.”

“Me, either. Andrew and I still carefully avoid the topic of what to do when the baby’s born.” Gabby sipped at her milk shake. “Okay, this is going to sound completely crazy, but I’ve actually thought he might be right. About me staying home with her kid.”

Hayley felt her eyes widen. Nicole’s mouth dropped open.

“Are you serious?”

“Maybe. I don’t know.” Gabby looked down at the table, then back at them. “I’m not loving my job. It’s so boring and I’m working way more hours than they’re paying me for. For the first week, I figured it was because I was rusty, but now I think they’re shoving things at me to see how much they can get out of me. I know it’s a nonprofit, but I’m only supposed to be working twenty hours a week. I’m working more like forty.”

Hayley winced. “When? You have three kids, a house, a husband.”

“Tell me about it. I stay up late, get up early. It’s hard. Especially when I think about how little I’m getting paid. I don’t know. Then I think about all the women who are struggling just to put food on the table and I feel guilty for complaining.”

“You get to complain,” Nicole told her. “We all do. Someone else’s circumstances have nothing to do with you.”

“That sounds completely rational,” Gabby agreed. “If only I could believe it.”

Hayley got that. Guilt was powerful. It was like fear—it sucked up all the air until a person couldn’t breathe.

“What does Andrew say about your potential change of heart?” Nicole asked.

“I haven’t told him. I’m still working it through. I want to be sure I’m not running from work, if that makes sense. I want to make the decision from a position of strength, not to escape a job I don’t like. Committing to raising Makayla’s baby is huge. But I can’t help thinking what I’m doing now isn’t enough.”

“Is the baby the only option?” Hayley asked.

“No. I’ve been thinking about going back to college. I don’t think I want to practice law anymore. But I’ve never considered what else there could be.”

“That’s a big step,” Nicole said.

Hayley nodded. She’d never gone to college. Just a couple of semesters, and then she’d met Rob. What would she be doing if she’d finished her education? She’d never thought much beyond being a wife and a mother. If she could do anything, she would...

“I’d study nursing,” she said, surprising herself. “If I went back to school.”

Nicole smiled. “No surprise there. It’s the sweet spirit we were talking about before. You’re good at taking care of people.”

“I wish that were true.” Hayley sighed. “Lately I’ve only been thinking of myself. With wanting to have a baby and all. Poor Rob. We’re finding our way back together, but I could have lost him. I’m glad I didn’t.”

“We are, too,” Gabby told her. “What about you, Nicole. What would you do differently?”

“I don’t know. I love my business. And I can’t say I wouldn’t have married Eric because I needed him to get Tyler. I’m going to accept where I am and be happy.”

“Can you let the movie thing go?” Hayley asked.

“I’m going to do my damnedest to try.”

Nicole raised her glass. The other two clinked theirs against it.

“To doing our damnedest,” Hayley said.

“Every day,” Gabby added. “Even if that means getting up at four in the morning.”





Chapter Twenty-Six

Nicole shifted her weight from foot to foot. “I really appreciate this,” she said, both worried and late. “Kristie is usually so dependable and I’m not comfortable canceling a class at the last minute.”

Jairus put his arm around her and led her toward the front door. “Go,” he said. “We’ll be fine. Right, Tyler?”

Her son beamed at her. “Mommy, we’re going to paint!” He spoke with a charming combination of awe and anticipation.

“I look forward to seeing what you’ve done when I get home.” She hesitated, not sure what other instructions she should give him.