The Forbidden

Jack helps me into his car, gets me comfy, fussing and faffing around me until I resort to batting him away. “Jack, I’m good,” I assure him, and he scowls at me in response. “I’m good,” I breathe, resting my head back, my hand involuntarily resting on my stomach.

The whole drive home, he holds my hand while I let my mind run away with me, wondering exactly what happens now. I have Jack back. My happiness should be complete. Yet I can’t ignore my apprehension, and I don’t think I should. We’re going to have to think carefully about how we approach this, decide together and be strong. This isn’t going to be easy. But my reward is Jack. Whether I deserve him or not is something I’m past agonizing over.

Once we’ve reached my apartment, Jack gets out of the car, rounding to meet me on the pavement. “Okay?”

“Okay,” I assure him as he relieves me of my bag. I head straight for the kitchen and flick the kettle on while Jack throws my bags to the floor next to the sofa.

“I’ll do that.” He muscles in, confiscating the teaspoon from me. “You go get on the couch.”

“Jack, I’m fine.”

“You look a little pale.” He scans my face, pouting. “How d’you feel?” His palm meets my forehead, feeling for my temperature.

Oh my God! “Perfect!” I laugh, reclaiming my spoon and loading my mug with sugar. “You’re not going to be irritating and smother me, are you? Because, just so you know, that’s going to drive me mad.”

“I can’t make any promises.” Jack seizes me from behind and whirls me around, pushing me up onto the worktop.

I drop my spoon on a tiny gasp of surprise. Given the circumstances, is it wrong that I’m reduced to a pool of lust? I’m not sure. I can’t think. He nuzzles into my cheek and breathes me into him.

“I’ve got you back,” he says quietly. “Thank God I’ve got you back.” Pulling away, he holds my hips and gazes at me like he can’t quite believe it’s me. “I’m going to make it up to you,” he vows. “For everything I’ve put you through.”

“Jack—”

“No.” His finger meets my lips, silencing me. “It’s not up for discussion. Now”—he drops a light peck on my cheek—“go get in some comfy clothes so we can slob out. I’ll finish the tea.” He leads me by the backs of my shoulders to the door. “Go.”

I submit, looking over my shoulder as I leave. “Jack,” I say as he goes to turn, hindering his return to the kitchen.

He looks at me questioningly. “What?”

“What are you going to do about Stephanie?” I don’t actually mean her; I mean more about her condition, and he knows it.

“I haven’t figured it all out yet,” he admits. “I honestly don’t know where to start.”

“And what about me?”

“I’ll have to tell her about you eventually.” He nods to my stomach with a small smile. “Not yet, but soon. Once the dust settles.”

“Okay.” But I wonder if the dust will ever settle.

“But maybe first I’ll move you to another country.”

I smile, despite it not being a laughing matter. He’s worried. I’m worried. “I think I’ll like you fussing over me,” I tell him, loving the elation that springs onto his face. I have to let him do his thing. And I want to. I want to let him fuss over me. Who would have thought?

“And I’m going to love doing it.” He winks and continues on his way. “Brace yourself, baby.”

I chuckle and go to the bathroom to freshen up and find some cozy clothes. Once I’ve brushed my teeth, washed my face, and dragged on some sweatpants and a tank top, I find my slouchy bag by the couch where Jack dumped it and grab my phone before making my way to join him in the kitchen, colliding with him as I enter. “Oh!” I drop my mobile and it hits my bare foot. “Fuck!” I yell, bringing it up and hopping around with a screwed-up face.

“Ouch!” Jack says on my behalf. “Come here, clumsy.” He picks me up and carries me into the lounge, putting me on the couch. “Let’s see.” He claims my foot, crouching by the sofa.

“It hurts,” I complain, feeling a throb begin to set in, peeking down to my foot as Jack rubs the sharp pain away.

“Let me get some ice.” Setting my foot on the cushion, he hands me the remote and disappears, returning seconds later with my phone and the ice. After he’s fussed over my foot, he hovers over me, bracing his arm on the chair and lowering his face close to mine. “Don’t move until I’m back.”

“Where are you going?” I ask, sounding affronted. We just got here.

“Shop. My sweet tooth is raging. I want to curl up on this couch with you and stuff myself stupid with Giant Strawbs. Then I’ll cook that meal I owe you.”

He’s going to cook for me. In my kitchen. “Get extra Strawbs,” I order, giggling when he dips, crowding me and smothering my face with wet kisses. “Stop!”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too!” I laugh, pushing him away. “Hurry up.” The sooner he goes, the sooner he’ll be back. I need to stick myself to him and I don’t plan on unsticking myself for a while.

Jack laughs as he leaves, and I flick through the channels…and flick…and flick, searching for anything decent to watch. “Rubbish,” I grunt, tossing the remote control aside and scooping up my phone when it rings. It’s Lizzy.

“Everything okay?” she asks in greeting.

At this particular moment in time, yes. Everything is perfect. I just have to have faith that this all works itself out. “For now, yes. Thank you for being there today.”

“I’d say I wouldn’t have had it any other way, but that would be a lie.” I smile, fully aware of the trauma I’ve put my friend through.

“I’m sorry. For lying to you, for putting you through today.”

“And I’m sorry for judging you,” she replies, bringing fresh tears to my eyes. “Now, don’t make a fuss, but Jason’s taking me to some posh place in Oxford. I need to borrow a cocktail dress.”

I smile at my phone. “Come over when you’re ready.”

“On my way!” She hangs up, and I go back to pointlessly flicking, snuggling down and flexing my foot back to life.

I’m still flicking when there’s a knock on the door a half hour later. Scrambling up from the couch, I go to let Lizzy in, pulling the door open with a huge smile on my face.

But it’s not Lizzy.

My smile falls and every drop of blood drains from my face.





Chapter 27



Stephanie.” I all but breathe, stepping back a few feet in shock.

“Hey, Annie.” She beams at me, bright and…normal? She looks normal, too. Composed and…normal. “I felt I should apologize for the other night.” Pulling her bag onto her shoulder, she walks straight in without me even offering.

She doesn’t know about me, I tell myself. Act normal! I look back onto the street, mindful that Jack could come back at any moment and change that.

“How are you?” I ask, just for the sake of it, because I haven’t the foggiest idea what else to say.

“Great!”

Great? She looks normal. She claims to be great. What the fuck am I missing? “That’s…great.” I smile awkwardly. I need to get her out. “I was just popping out,” I say as non-offensively as I can.