It was so cold that night. I could see my breath, so to entertain myself, I kept blowing hot air out of my mouth.
People went in and out of the house throughout the night, and hardly even noticed me sitting on the bench. I reached into my back pocket and pulled out a small pad of paper and the pen that I always had with me, and started to doodle. Whenever Ma wasn’t around, I kept myself busy by drawing.
I drew a lot that night, until I started to yawn. Eventually I fell asleep, tucking my legs inside of my red hoodie and lying down against the bench. When I was sleeping, I didn’t feel as cold, which was kind of nice.
“Hey!” A harsh voice said, waking me from my sleep. The moment my eyes slightly opened, I was reminded of the coldness. My body began to shiver, but I didn’t sit up. “Hey, kid! What the fuck are you doing here?” the voice questioned. “Get up.”
I sat up and rubbed my eyes, yawning. “My ma is inside. I’m just waiting.” My eyes focused in on the guy speaking my way, and my eyes widened with nerves. He looked mean, and had a big scar running down the left side of his face. His hair was wild, peppered with black and white, and his eyes kind of looked like mine. Brown and boring.
“Yeah? How long have you been waiting?” he hissed, with some kind of cigarette hanging between his lips.
My eyes moved up to the darkened sky. It was light when Ma and I arrived. I didn’t answer the man. He groaned and sat down next to me. I scooted closer to the edge of the bench, as far away from him as I could get.
“Chill the fuck out, kid. Ain’t no one gonna hurt you. Your mom’s a junkie?” he asked. I didn’t know what that meant, so I shrugged. He snickered. “If she’s in that house, she’s a junkie. What’s her name?”
“Julie,” I whispered.
“Julie what?”
“Julie Silverstone.”
His lips slightly parted and he tilted his head, looking my way. “Your mom’s Julie Silverstone?”
I nodded.
“And she left you out here?”
I nodded again.
“That bitch,” he muttered standing up from the bench with his hands in fists. He started for the front door and as he opened the screen door, he paused. He took the cigarette from between his lips and held it out to me. “You smoke pot?” he questioned.
It wasn’t a cigarette at all. I should’ve known by the smell. “No.”
His brows furrowed. “You said Julie Silverstone, right?” I nodded for the third time. He placed the joint in my hands. “Then you smoke pot. It will keep you warm. I’ll be back with your bitch of a mother.”
“She’s not a,”—the door slammed before he could hear me complete my sentence—“bitch.”
I held the joint between my fingers and shivered in the cold.
It will keep you warm.
I was freezing.
So I took a puff, and choked on my own coughing.
I coughed hard for a long time, stomping out the joint into the ground. I didn’t understand why anyone would do that—why anyone would ever smoke. That was the moment I vowed to never smoke again.
When the man came out, he was dragging Ma along with him. She was hardly awake, and sweaty.
“Stop yanking me, Ricky!” she yelled at the man.
“Shut the hell up, Julie. You left your damn kid out here all night, you fucking crackhead.”
My fists formed and I puffed out my chest. How dare he talk to Ma like that! He didn’t know her. She was my best friend, other than my brother Kellan. And that guy had no right to talk to Ma like that. Kellan would’ve been so mad if he heard that guy. Good thing he wasn’t here and was with his father on some kind of ice fishing trip.
I didn’t know people could fish when there was ice out, but Kellan told me all about it last week. Ma said ice fishing was for weirdos and losers.
“I told you, Ricky! I ain’t using any more. I—I promise,” she stuttered. “I just stopped here to see Becky.”
“Bullshit,” he replied, pulling her down the steps. “Come on, kid.”
“Where are we going, Ma?” I asked, following behind my mom, wondering what was going to happen next.
“I’m driving you two home,” the man replied. He put Ma in his passenger seat, where she closed her eyes and slumped over. Then he opened the back door for me, slamming it shut after I climbed inside. “Where do you stay?” he asked, climbing into the driver’s seat and driving off, away from the curb.
His car was shiny and nice, nicer than any car I’d ever seen. Ma and I took the bus everywhere, so being in his car kind of made me feel like royalty.
Ma started hacking and coughing, and tried her best to clear her throat. “See, that’s why I had to see Becky. My landlord is being a dick and told me that I didn’t pay the last two months! But I did, Ricky! I paid that asshole, and he’s acting like I didn’t. So I came to see Becky to get some money.”
“Since when does Becky ever have money?” he asked.
“She didn’t. She didn’t have money, I guess. But I had to see. Because the landlord said I can’t come back if I didn’t have the money. So I’m not sure where we should go. You should let me go check with Becky really quick,” she muttered, opening her passenger door as the car drove.
“Ma!”