My finger hovered over the send button for entirely too long.
Visiting one sick kid wasn’t the same as exhausting myself in hospitals every opportunity I got. What would be the harm in just flying out for one day? It wouldn’t even have to be a full day. I could be back in time for dinner. Or, better yet, maybe Sam would go with me and we could make it a fun trip for both of us.
My finger inched closer to the send button.
Surely, he’d be on board with something like this. He knew how important visiting sick kids was for me. I mean, he couldn’t expect me to give it up completely.
“You’re not Spiderman.”
Shit.
I pressed play on the video once more, my finger still hovering over send as I watched that little boy’s eyes light when my song came through the speaker of my phone.
It’s the right thing to do. No matter how it affects me.
But what about how it affected Sam?
Before I even realized it, I was on my feet and heading out to Sam’s shop. I slung the door open and was instantly greeted by the loud grinding of a power tool. Sam was in the corner, hunched over a table, a cigarette dangling between his lips. The room fell silent as his gaze swung to mine. I must have looked panicked, because he immediately dropped the tool on the table and marched in my direction.
“What’s wrong?”
“Can we go to Indiana?”
He spun to drop his cigarette into an ashtray before turning back to face me. “Depends on why you want to go, I guess.”
“There’s a sick little boy who sent me a video on Twitter. I think it would be a really nice thing to do. It’s not like I have a lot going on right now. But I bet it would mean a lot if we showed up. I could have Stewart get in touch with his parents and make it a big surprise,” I rushed out in one long breath until I ran out of air.
He arched an eyebrow.
I sucked in deeply before exclaiming, “We could both go! Make it a romantic getaway!”
He stared at me for a minute before silently flipping his palm up, requesting my phone. I sidled up beside him as he pressed play on the video.
My eyes bounced between his face and the phone as I watched him smile warmly at the child on the screen. When it ended, he tossed an arm around my shoulders, and just like I had, he pressed play again. I cuddled into his chest, wrapping my arms around his hips. Closing my eyes, I listened to his strong heartbeat as I awaited the verdict.
“What do you want to do, Levee?” he asked when the video ended.
I didn’t open my eyes as I answered, “I want to go.”
“And you think that will help him?”
“I don’t know.”
“But you think it might help you though, right?”
Yes. “I don’t know.”
Sam sucked in a hard breath, my head rising as his chest expanded. “You know I love you, right?” he said.
I didn’t answer that question, nor did I release my hold around his waist even when his arms fell away from me. “You’re going to tell me no, aren’t you?”
“No. I’m not telling you anything. If you want to go, go.”
I craned my neck back in surprise. “You want to go with me?”
“Nope,” he answered shortly.
“Why…why not?” I stuttered.
“Because you’re supposed to be on a break. You’re supposed to be going to see your therapist tomorrow. You’re supposed to be firing Devon, contacting Stewart, cleaning out your closet.” He paused, raking an angry hand through his hair. “You’re supposed to be fucking moving in with me.”
Shit. Maybe I am moving in permanently.
I finally stepped away. “What do you expect me to do, Sam?”
“The things you promised!” he roared before collecting himself. “If you want to go, do it. But that’s on you,” he snapped, turning his back on me.
My guilt morphed to anger. “See, that’s exactly the problem. It is on me!”
His back was still to me as he lit a cigarette. “Two days.” He laughed without humor.