“Guess who’s gonna pay for it if we get caught?” Tino barked at her. “You just threw me under the bus.”
“I’ll tell them you didn’t know.” Carina popped her gum again. “I promise.”
“Which isn’t a lie.” Brianna looked to Tino in concern. “I thought you knew.”
Tino dropped his head back against the seat. “Cazzo.”
“I had to cheer for Brianna,” Carina went on, though she sounded a little frantic. “What kind of friend would I be if I didn’t come?”
“Carina.” Tino sighed in annoyance. “If we get caught, I’m fucked on so many levels.”
Carina was quiet for a long time before she said, “I’m sorry.”
Tino closed his eyes. “Just don’t do it again.”
“Am I an asshole?” Carina asked in the same way Tino had, looking to Brianna for confirmation.
“Yeah.” Brianna winced. “Pretty much.”
“Does that mean you don’t love me anymore?” Carina asked like a girl who needed someone to love her more than anything. It was a rare show of vulnerability from her. “That you don’t wanna be my brother?”
Tino snorted and looked back to her. “If I stopped loving someone for being an asshole, I would’ve dumped Nova ages ago. Brothers love you even when you fuck up. That’s sorta how it works.”
Tino’s excitement for anything in general had waned since the night before.
The Bed-Stuy trip went from being the one thing he was excited about to just one more thing to do because he was fucking obligated. It was hot, the walk was long on crutches, and now, on top of everything else, he had to worry about getting caught with Carina.
He was still fighting that void that wanted to sneak up and wipe out any semblance of who he was before he’d been forced to move to Dyker Heights.
And what the fuck was he fighting it for?
He wanted to be numb.
He wanted to stop thinking about what happened the day before.
He wanted to be pissed off at Carina for being built like her mother in a twelve-year-old sort of way. It was really fucking him up, on every single level. He could see what she was going to turn into, and it was making him feel like he was going to lose his lunch again.
He was irrationally furious at his ma. Which he hated, because she was gone, and he didn’t want the nice things about her to be ruined.
He was sort of pissed off at Romeo too.
For being in jail.
It was just all mixed up in his mind, the fear for Romeo and the fear of Mary.
And he still had a whole fuckload of issues where Nova was concerned.
Tino wasn’t naturally an angry person.
And Carina was a brand-new sister.
He couldn’t imagine hating her too.
Carina isn’t her mother.
He said it like a chant in his mind, knowing that like karate, if he practiced something enough, it became second nature. He wasn’t going to let Cosa Nostra ruin that too.
They didn’t get to ruin it.
“What song are you dancing to?” he asked Brianna on instinct, because he needed something to be fucking excited about, but then just as he said it, he realized he didn’t want to know yet. “Never mind.”
She stopped walking and looked at him curiously.
“I don’t wanna know. I thought I did, but I don’t. I’ll wait.”
She frowned.
Carina did too.
“I want it to be a surprise,” he explained to both of them. “’Cause, you know, I don’t have cable.”
Brianna was still frowning, her cheeks pinker than usual. She got flustered easily. He thought it was cute in a way few girls had appealed to him before now. Plus, she had these amazing green eyes that glowed in the sunshine.
They were unique.
And her hair was too, this very dark red, not orange, but more copper. It almost didn’t look real, but he was sure it was.
She had on black stretch pants and one of those loose-fitting, very hip-hop-styled tank tops. The sleeves hung open down to her waist, showing off her sports bra. It almost worked; she almost fit in, except her hair was pulled into a tight, ballet-dancer-type bun.
“You should take your hair down,” he said as he started walking again. “I promise none of the girls in this crew wear their hair like that. It’s too stuck-up looking.”
“But it’ll get in my face,” she argued as she followed him.
“He’s right,” Carina agreed and pulled at one of the pins in Brianna’s hair as if she had already decided.
“Stop it!” Brianna snapped at her. “I can’t do it right if it’s in my face.”
Carina pulled out another pin.
Brianna pushed her, but Carina was unfazed.
By the time they got to the studio, Carina had a handful of pins, and Brianna’s hair was a mess of red waves that hung down to the middle of her back.
They stood outside the studio doors, and Brianna held up her hands at both of them. “This isn’t gonna work. It’ll be in my face the whole friggin’ time. If I screw up, it won’t matter how I look.”
Tino supposed that would be a problem, so he pulled off his hat and put it on her head. Carina reached over and messed with the sides of Brianna’s hair, making it fall right under the hat and pushing it out of her eyes.